Yesterday my MIL asked, "so are you actually seeing a doctor yet or anything?" I said, "I have my 1st appointment at the end of the month." So she asks, "Where are you going?" I know what's coming, so I'm like, "uhhh, I'm going to someone in tampa" (duh).
"No, who's your doctor?"
"oh, well, I'm seeing a midwife at a birthing center."
here it comes, here it comes, from the MIL (who's an MD, darnit!), "You know, they're not really safe."
I explained briefly that she's well known, in an established clinic, they have an affiliation with MDs in case anything goes wrong, etc. etc. We'll see if this is the end of this or not. Meanwhile my own mom who's also an MD is like "whatever" she totally doesn't care. In fact she told me about an OB colleague of hers who said, "After going through this and knowing what we do to women, when it comes time for my own child I just want to go miles and miles away from anyone and any hospital."
Anyone else have familial opposition on the whole midwife/homebirth/nat'l birth thing?
i'm thinking I need to have on hand some JAMA, Lancet or other med journal studies to whip out if needed on questioning people. Actually most of MILs friends are docs so I'm expecting some tough questions later on when they find out abt the pregnancy and my mw decision.
"No, who's your doctor?"
"oh, well, I'm seeing a midwife at a birthing center."
here it comes, here it comes, from the MIL (who's an MD, darnit!), "You know, they're not really safe."
I explained briefly that she's well known, in an established clinic, they have an affiliation with MDs in case anything goes wrong, etc. etc. We'll see if this is the end of this or not. Meanwhile my own mom who's also an MD is like "whatever" she totally doesn't care. In fact she told me about an OB colleague of hers who said, "After going through this and knowing what we do to women, when it comes time for my own child I just want to go miles and miles away from anyone and any hospital."
Anyone else have familial opposition on the whole midwife/homebirth/nat'l birth thing?
i'm thinking I need to have on hand some JAMA, Lancet or other med journal studies to whip out if needed on questioning people. Actually most of MILs friends are docs so I'm expecting some tough questions later on when they find out abt the pregnancy and my mw decision.
:
And after going through it once, DH feels better about using the midwives if I go full term this time. He even saved the money we were going to pay for the last birth, so we could still use it for this birth (since I was quitting my job and our income was cutting in half - makes it alot harder to come up with $2000).
The hospital wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, and I do have an OB now that is really good with natural births, but I would still prefer the atmosphere of home, even if isn't my home (I have to go to a house across the state line to birth... only 15 minutes from my house though).
Yup....right now EVERYONE has an opinion!
I know my husband left his parents and is cleaving unto his wife, so what his parents think is secondary to what he and I think about our children and how we birth/raise them. Luckily, we're mostly in agreement about stuff, but the midwife issue was a little scary to his family (my family was ok - my sister used a midwife).
)
I was a first timer last time, and "young" (27/28 compared to the average age in my husband's congregations of around 70 and 75). They all were skeptical - and they ALL had opinions =) But you know what, it was those opinions that helped get me through the rough parts of labor. I knew that I could either plug through because I *could* do it... or I could face the "I told you so"s for the rest of my life here. They had no idea that they were the most powerful motivators! In fact, my best friend just had her first child last night - and she said the same thing... it was all the people she knew were doubting her that got her through a difficult, LONG labor without meds.
