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How many kids in one bedroom? - Page 2

post #21 of 35
This is something I wonder about too. Although I don't think it's detrimental for kids to share bedrooms, I also know that I didn't enjoy it as a child. I was desperate to have a room of my own, and finally talked my parents into letting me move into the basement when I was about 10.

Right now we have 4 kids and 3 bedrooms on the main floor. We have a boys' room, a girls' room, and a parents' room. The kids' bedrooms are pretty small, and I don't know what we're going to do in a couple of years when baby #5 is ready to move out of our bed. Our options are to move kids into the basement, or move to a bigger house.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mat4mel

For those of you whose kids use bunkbeds--- I am nervous about my 5 yr old dd sleeping on the top bunk, but I don't think we're going to have a choice. She is very agile and could climb up and down pretty easily but it still makes me nervous. Does 5 seem too young?
I know the AAP doesn't reccomend bunk beds until the age of 6, but I think it depends on the child. My DS started sleeping on the top bunk at age 4. My DD started sleeping on the top bunk at age 3.5 (with her 1yo sister sleeping on the bottom). We've never had any problems with this arrangement.
post #22 of 35
I'd do 3+ kids per room, but would try to have an "extra" room. Shared sleep is shared sleep, whether it's with one sib or three or five, but sometimes alone-ness is needed. Especially approaching adolescence. My personal ideal for several kids is four bedrooms--master, boys, girls, and spare--a room where anyone can get a few minutes/hours alone, or can go when they are sick and up all night or if they are upset with a roommate or something.

But I'm the voice of inexperience. No clue how this would play out IRL, just something DH and I have always kind of thought would be neat. Although when we had a couple familes living with us we let the kids hide out in our master bedroom when they were looking foor some peace and quiet for a littel while. It worked out well in that situation.
post #23 of 35

I never shared a room...

however, lots of people did for many generations. Houses for large families were small by today's standards. In my extended family most of my aunts and uncles had large (4-8 kids) families. Most everyone shared a room at least for part of the time.

I have no problem with having children sharing a room if by some chance our family grows really quickly.
post #24 of 35
I was the 5th out of six. I hated, hated, hated sharing a bedroom.
post #25 of 35
We live in a 1 1/2 story 1200 sq foot 3 BR house. (Enough numbers for you? )

We have 3 boys. The youngest is still sharing the Master bedroom.

At one time there was a family with 10 kids living in this house.

When I feel bad about having a small house, I think of them.

Now that I've decluttered, the house is feeling more comfortable.

I'd love to make the kitchen bigger (it's not big enough for a table) and add 1 bedroom and a bathroom (there's only one) but we don't have the money now and also I'm not eager to disrupt our lives that much.

It would probably be easier to just get a bigger house but I have never found one I like as much as ours.

I do think it's kind of silly this idea that we all "need" a big house. I know many people like them and if they can afford them that's fine but it's possible to survive without them.

I also like the fact that our mortgage payment is so affordable. Makes it much easier for me to SAH
post #26 of 35
I am so impressed to read this thread. So many people think that they need to have a huge house and I think you are all on to something. In today's society it seems like people think a bigger house is better, but that is not always true.

I can't talk from experience about having several kids in one room as I only have one child and a 4 (really small) bedroom house. Our house was built in 1919 and when I say small rooms, I am talking one of the rooms could barely fit a twin bed and maybe a little dresser. Anyway, I know the people that lived in this house a few years back owned it for 50+ years and raised 4 or 5 kids here. It would have been quite cramped as it only had about 1100 square feet of finished space when we moved in. We have since finished the basement which adds nice square footage and is definitely big enough for us...too big really. With only one child, we don't need much space.

We live in a part of the country where real estate is very inexpensive so it is not unusual for people to have big houses and small families here. It is crazy what some people think they need. I applaud you all for having such wonderful families and for making the most out of the space you have.
post #27 of 35
Personally, I think it all depends on many factors. Things like whether or not there is a sufficient space to play outdoors, where you are storing toys and such, how big the bedroom are, etc.

Thus far both of our girls share a room (even though there is another room that isn't even being used!)
post #28 of 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by newcastlemama
I just don't want my kids to think they were abused!
What do you think???
Room sharing is absolutely NOT abuse!!! It's amazing what some people today think regarding the "rights" of children to have their own huge living space. Many/most of my friends think DH and I are crazy to have our two sons sharing a bedroom. Just two kids in one room. People ask "don't you have enough bedrooms?" Ugh. The boys love it. Giving them their own rooms would seem silly (why would a three-year-old or a one-year-old need their very own room?) and lonely, too.

Their room is big and could easily accommodate a third child. I'm not sure what my upper limit would be for how many kids to put in one room. It would probably have to do with the dynamics of a particular group. I imagine that space and personalities would have something to do with it.

I'm one of 5 kids and shared a room with one or more siblings for most of my life. My three brothers shared a room for years. We didn't love every second of it, but that doesn't mean it was a bad thing. Companionship is good, having to share space and learn to peacefully co-exist is good. All of us had some impressive roommate skills when we went off to college. I think we also had to get creative with finding ways to make/get our own personal space.
post #29 of 35
I am living with all 5 of my children in one bedroom. We share kitchen/bathroom with two other adults. We use plastic bins for dressers, have one king bed, and 2 twin beds in here along with my computer desk and TV stand. It is a tight fit but I am not complaining. It has been a many lessons time packed with enlightenment. lol!

I don't think your kids will think of it that way unless you present it that way. know what i mean? I think it is better for kids to share spaces and bedrooms.
post #30 of 35
Regarding bunk beds - my brothers had bunks. I think the one in the top bunk was 5 when the bunks were purchased. Never any problem. We're planning to get bunks for our boys whenever baby #3 comes along, which will probably be when Griff is 5. He has already informed me that he *needs* bunk beds and that he is going to sleep on the top bunk.
post #31 of 35
We were fully prepared to have both children in one room, but dd1 was keeping dd2 awake. Dd1 is an awful sleeper. We ended up moving her to our home office and recently bought her a wardrobe since there's no closet in the room. I would like to move them back together at some point. When the IL's come on one of their extended visits we won't have a choice.
post #32 of 35
I have read about large familes who suggest that the child who is needing personal space go hang out in Mom & Dads room for a while. I think that is a good idea.
post #33 of 35
I was in a bedroom with four of us as a child and loved it.
post #34 of 35
my kids have very small bedrooms to themselves. the shared until my dd started keeping my ds up all ngiht at 6-7 mos. so i found him is own room b/c it wasn't fair.

sleep is sleep. I shared a room until I was 7 almost 8. It never bothered me. first with ym grandmother, then with my brother... and it never occured to me that was weird. sure he got on my nerves... but he wuld have if he was a girl.

at young ages I don't think it matters unless one kids is waking the others etc. But when they get older (7-12) if they seem to require alone space and have no where else to find it then I guess that's something that would need to be taken into consideration.

I think by giving a kid too much space it can makes them greedy/stingy/selfish. too little can make them feel unvalued. it really just depends on the family and individual child to decide this balance.

there is nothing the least bit wrong with sharing sleeping quarters! =)
post #35 of 35
I shared a room until I was 10 then we built another house and I had my own room until I went to college. I really didn't mind sharing a room with my sister but I didn't like sharing a bed. We both slept in a full bed. I wouldn't have minded sharing a room so much if I'd had my own bed where I could chill by myself.

We're moving into a smaller 3 bedroom home in July. DS and DD will share a room for the next few years and we hope to have another little one this year who will sleep in our room for at least the first year.

We'd like to have four kids (crossing my fingers for two boys and two girls). I think the 4 bedroom idea would be cool. Master bedroom, boys room, girls room and a "chill" room for quiet reading, etc..That's our goal. When we hit the four kid limit we'll either build on to the house we're moving into or buy another house!
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