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Intact men who support circumcision?

post #1 of 47
Thread Starter 
We used to live in Mexico and had some friends from Argentina. The husband is intact but they circ'd their boy and when they found out we had circ'd our first son he was like "Oh that is wonderful, I am so glad you did it. It is so much cleaner, etc." This coming from an intact man!! Dh had actually encountered several men like this over his life and that was one of the reasons he was adamant about circing ds 1. (I will add my usual disclaimer that ds 2 is intact and dh no longer believes in circing) Why do you think intact men say things like this? And this man was from a very intact culture, it is not like he was surrounded my circ'd Americans and felt different.
post #2 of 47
I don't get this either. I mean, it sounds so disingenuous. Like they aren't really telling the truth.

If they are FOR circ, why don't they get one for themselves?!
post #3 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ann-Marita

If they are FOR circ, why don't they get one for themselves?!
:
post #4 of 47
My ex who is from Poland he is intact and what he thought of circumcison was that he thought it would be like just a dorsal slit not remove a whole thing.

Maybe he's one of those over cleaners like my ex and all really they needed was to pull rinse just once in the shower but my ex cleaned himself with 'soap' at showers, before dtd and after . So maybe their parents were with scare tatics making them to really overclean under their foreskin .
post #5 of 47
In my experience, discussing it with my intact Icelandic buddy, it was lack of facts. He thought circumcised was better because it was healthier and easier to care for. It's just what he had heard repeatedly, but he couldn't elaborate.

I gave him some basic facts, links and info during a short conversation and he immediately changed his tune and was suddenly very thankful he was intact. It has come up again innumerable times...we kinda have the hots for each other and talk sex a lot. He is pro-foreskin now, where before, he just thought, "Eh, I hear circumcised is better, but I'm happy, so why would I run and out and do it?"

He didn't realize WHERE so much of his pleasure came from. Now he does!! Oh, and he lives in Orlando and his American girlfriend has no complaints.
post #6 of 47
I would say it again, lack of information. The intact men don't know what they have and don't know what their son's would be missing. My father was led to believe that circ was essentially the same except it was cleaner. Of course, my father NEVER was circ'd himself. But, the doctors convinced him to do my brother apparently (who went on to circ his own two sons never knowing that his own father was intact)
post #7 of 47
Yeah, it's interesting, you'll notice that they never do it to themselves, wonder why that is if they really think circ'd is so much better.
post #8 of 47
Never encountered that before. My family is European. They would be horrified if I circed their grandchild, nephew, etc.
DH is intact as well and likes it the way it is. (He also is very clean )
I think intact fathers wanting their sons circed would be very, very rare.
post #9 of 47
I have a friend who thinks this as well.

Could it be a "grass is greener" issue?
post #10 of 47
If they've come to the US it might have something to do with having their children "fit in." But I think also that they have no idea what they would be missing....or maybe they do on some level since they don't rush out to do it themselves. Kinda like a circ'd man who thinks circ is "better" because he has no idea what he IS missing.
post #11 of 47
I think in countries where there is a marked difference between rich and poor circ is often marketed as another way to separate yourself from the poor...aka: dirty.

Really I think it used to be that way to some extent in the US too. Not circing meant you couldn't afford it.

Casey
post #12 of 47
I think in general men have a tendency to want for their sons what they have themselves. WHether they are circumcised or not, they tend to assume until other factors (like education) become involved, that their sons will have genitals that match theirs. There is one very notable exception to this: I suspect that the neonatal circumcision rate of sons of men who were ridiculed for not being circumcised is virtually 100%. They do not want their sons to go through what they went through growing up. I think we all should be able to understand that feeling, though we may not agree with it and though it may not be true for boys growing up now. A final factor to consider is that foreskins still gets a lot of bad press in the US. THere is, for example, hardly a sitcom that hasn't done a cirucmcision-themed episode, and the message of all the mass media is that circumcised is better than uncircumcised.
post #13 of 47
I'd say lack of information. Since here in Scandinavia circumcision is not done, people don't quite understand how horrible infant circ is. When I have showed the circ video to my Scandinavian friends they have been absolutely appauled and I do not repeat their comments here.

The clean/dirt issue is concidered pretty absurd here, same with diseases. People usually just laugh at that and think it is ridiculous.
post #14 of 47
My father is intact and always wished he was circ'd.
post #15 of 47
One of DH's coworkers is intact (he is Mexican) and didn't know anything about circ. The coworker was surprised to find out that we had left DS intact (as DH is circ'd) and asked DH to have me email him some info about circ. I sent him a ton of links, including the intact.ca video and pictures of botched circs. He was shocked by the info and glad I had sent it to him, said he would never have a son circ'd after seeing it. Before that he just didn't know anything about it, assumed that since it was so common it must be better.

I always thought it was ironic that my first bit of intactivism was to an intact man.
post #16 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by laralou
My father is intact and always wished he was circ'd.
Did you ever ask him why he didn't just go and get it done then? It's not as though he doesn't have a choice is it? Unlike all those poor men done at birth whether they wanted it or not.
post #17 of 47
I think he never felt that strongly that he would have an elective surgery at this point. I have tried to argue with him, but he has a lot of issues about it and gets upset when I talk about it in front of him. I feel sorry for him, because I really believe it is due to social stigma, which I feel will change as the numbers of intact babies grow.

I do know a very well known and respected member here who said that her teenage son told her he wished she had circ'd him. I can't disclose who because it would violate her privacy, but it does help us realize how far we have to go to change the social climate- even today.
post #18 of 47
I'm currently talking to a pregnant friend about leaving her unborn, second child intact. She mentioned that one of the main reasons that she circumcised her first son over ten years ago was because her intact brother drilled it into her head that her son would be "humiliated in the locker room" if left intact. But don't you know that her brother never felt so strongly about it that he himself got circumcised. And he ended up leaving his own sons intact!
post #19 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sirte
I'm currently talking to a pregnant friend about leaving her unborn, second child intact. She mentioned that one of the main reasons that she circumcised her first son over ten years ago was because her intact brother drilled it into her head that her son would be "humiliated in the locker room" if left intact. But don't you know that her brother never felt so strongly about it that he himself got circumcised. And he ended up leaving his own sons intact!
ugh, how horrible.

I was talking to a male friend of mine who happens to be intact about how good it was to be. He mentioned it and then went "ugh" I asked him what the problem was, told him how much better it was that he was left whole and to never EVER let anyone tell him otherwise.
post #20 of 47
...She mentioned that one of the main reasons that she circumcised her first son over ten years ago was because her intact brother drilled it into her head that her son would be "humiliated in the locker room" if left intact. ...

I believe this "locker room humiliation" is greatly exagerated... I am intact, and never had any comments about my status there. Guys in the locker room may have noticed whether another guy was circ'd or not, but you certainly did not tease or comment about it, for fear of being accused of being "queer" for showing an interest in another guy's genitials...
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