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Anyone have a meth addicted family member?

post #1 of 61
Thread Starter 
I do , my baby brother. He is 24, and has had a "problem" for 2-3 years. He is like a completely diferent person. He has turned to crime to support his habit and has been arrested many times and has done time in jail. He has broken our hearts, and is not ready for help. He was just arrested again yesterday.

Meth addiction is like a dirty secret in the family. People have a preconceived notion of what kind of family you come from.

They don't understand how we can love him and yet hate the drug and what he has become.

It makes people, even friends uncomfortable.

So, I am wondering if anyone else can relate.

Are you out there?
post #2 of 61

i absolutely do. feel free to pm me if you want to talk about it.
post #3 of 61
I'm so sorry.

My little brother (25) and my sil (20) both used meth for about a year. Sil was hospitalized twice.

They both kicked it for a year, relapsed for several months, and are clean again 18mos and counting. Meth is transparent. We know when they're using and when they're not.

Meth is awful.

I totally understand how you can love the person and hate the drug.

I know, at least in my part of the country, it's a lot more common than people will admit.
post #4 of 61
someone very close to me is in the process of healing from a heroin addiction, it's scary & sad.
post #5 of 61
Not meth, as far as I know, but everything else. Unfortunately, at 35 and cumulative years of being in lock-down treatment, he's back on the streets.

Good luck to you and your family. Al-Anon can be very helpful in these situations, if you haven't tried a meeting out yet, please do go find one and give it a chance.

After all these years (his first time in treatment was at age 16), I don't even really feel love for him. I'm so angry that he treats his daughter like crap. He's not allowed to see her until he's spent 6 months clean and he can't even do that. It's been years of therapy for his 8 year old, who is just crushed that her father doesn't think she's important enough to call on her birthday. It's so incredibly sad.

He recently even said to my sister, "I'm not going to have children." To which she said, "What?!?!?! You have a daughter, s*#&thead!"

Sorry, didn't mean to derail your thread. I just wish your brother so much more than this. <hugs>
post #6 of 61
My dad got arrested for cooking some up.
post #7 of 61
Yep. My brother.

He spent five years using. He stole from family, from the family business to support his habit. He lied. He arranged to have his truck stolen for drugs. He was a mess. I could not stand to be around him nor could I take the risk.

He lost his job, his home, his wife and son.

His ex turned in his dealer. A big time guy who put a hit out on him and another son. (from a previous relationship) The guy went down as did the ring. My brother hid out for a year or so.

He was still using through this. Coming home to nothing he finally got clean.

He relapsed in February. Swears it was only one time but I will always wonder....

post #8 of 61
Another 'yes'. My BIL was using it. We're not really sure if he still is. It really sucks because there is so little support for people to get clean, especially for people without insurance. He's been trying to get his life on track on his own, but who knows how that is working out (DH calls him every week- we live in another state, sp we don't really know what is actually happening).

My mom works in a NICU in a midwestern state and says that more than half of the babies are there because of meth. It is like nothing they have ever seen.

Did anyone watch Frontline's special yesterday? You can watch it on www.pbs.org It was so upsetting. Drug companies shipped directly to cookers for years and few in congress did any thing (except in Oregon). Now that Sudafed is behind the counter, the pharma companies are sending a hugely inflated amount to Mexico.
post #9 of 61
My uncle's wife. 40-ish, 2 adult children, one teenaged son. Even got her oldest into drugs, but thankfully he is clean now. She's not. Steals from the family. Uncle is divorcing her after nearly 25 years of marriage because she is so out of control. :-(
post #10 of 61
My mother and stepfather have done meth off and on my entire life. I hated it. Just when things were going ok (well as ok as you can get in an abusive household) they would start cooking up crank and pretty soon jobs would be lost and they would have to move in with any family member willing to take us in. It was a terrible way to grow up. My moms body is so gross and nasty looking from years of shooting up and she doesn't even have any teeth, she has to wear dentures.
post #11 of 61
Originally Posted by swimswamswum
My mom works in a NICU in a midwestern state and says that more than half of the babies are there because of meth. It is like nothing they have ever seen.
Sadly Rose the problem is bigger than people want to admit. I think
it's really great that you started this thread, for you to find support and
other's who thought they were alone can realize they are not.

Recently a friend had a extended stay in AR for the funeral of her FIL.
She said that meth is a HUGE problem there. She said she couldn't
get threw a trip in public without seeing children with no teeth or rotting
teeth. She asked somebody and they said that is due to the huge
meth problem. She was horrified.

My blessings are with you, your Brother and your family.
post #12 of 61
My brother and sister do. They get high together. He just went to prison you may have heard of him the feds called him the grinch that stole xmas. He demolished well over 100 mail boxes looking for money around xmas time. He was so high all he got was 5 dollars a gift card he was to scared to use and 18 months prison. My sister called me 3 days ago for bail money. This is the third time this year. Her husband took the kids 1700 miles away to his home town filed for divorce and she hasnt seen them for at least 7 months. They were staying with me abot a month prior while bil got prepared. I gave him the money to get out of town on because my sister was getting so high that when she finally fell asleep she wouldnt get up to feed the kids or ANYTHING. She also started violently spanking. The day I went over there I was going to tell her that if she didnt get on track our family was going to report her the cps.I remember the day I walked in to her apartment and it was pitch black. The boys were watching tv. They ran up to me and said "we come to you house" My sister was asleep it was almost 2. The little one was in a diaper and shirt the big one was in a shirt. They were filthy. There was ciggarette buts all over cat poop on the floor house was disgusting. I started to cry and the little one looked at me and says luv you jaime. I grabbed all the dirty clothes I could carry. Tried to grab dipes but of course there were none. Looked in the fridge and it was bare. Took those boys home and never looked back. She didnt even call for 5 days!!!! She doesnt deserve the boys I love them so much I cry as I type this and my stomach hurts as it did the day I rescued them. There was no way I would have left the boys in that apartment. We went home ate like crazy and watched sponge bob followed up by a trip to the park a nice bath and we all fell asleep on the couch me weeping soflty and promising the boys that I would always be there ALWAYS. I am getting very emotional now so I will end this saying. Meth is the worst thing I have ever seen and it destroys everything in its path. I feel for all the people suffering with addiction and their families. The boys were 2.5 and 4.5 At the time
post #13 of 61
I haven't been touched by meth addiction, but I couldn't read this without offering hugs to all you ladies who have. What a huge waste of life, money and everything that is important in this world.
post #14 of 61
no family members, but it's ripped my community apart. i know a few people who went to jail for it. i've watched friends become shells of themselves, acquaintances disappear--whether because of meth, incarceration or rehab, who knows...? as someone who works in harm reduction, i don't usually have an opinion as to whether or not a drug is "bad." but imo, meth is in a class by itself; the damage that it does is like nothing i've ever seen. and now our community is dealing with the second wave of HIV--lots of people seem to be getting infected again.

if it's any consolation, i do know quite a lot of people who've been able to kick it. BUT they really have to get to the point that they WANT to quit with everything in them, and usually they get to that point by almost losing everything, however they define that: for some, it was almost losing a career; for others, their lives. nothing you can say will do it, believe me, i've tried many times. it's futile. sad to say, but they just don't get it when they are in the grip of meth.
post #15 of 61
I suspect my brother is using.

I recently saw in the paper where my highschool boyfriend was arrested for running a meth lab. I talked to a mutual friend, and he's abandoned his 4 children and has become a completely different person. He was such a great guy, it was really sad to hear.

It's rampant here in the AR/TX area. I was talking to a kid at church the other day, and she said she was one of only 3 people she knew that hadn't tried it, and that several of her friends were hooked. She's in the 10th grade.
post #16 of 61
Nobody in my family, but it has taken its toll on my hometown. Also my folks own some farm land and one time people were cooking meth on their land.

When I visit my folks I see strangers out in public and they just look a mess. They just about have to be using meth.
post #17 of 61
Yep, my 18 year old cousin has been arrested several times for it and also drinking and driving at the same time. He had his trial a few weeks ago and is on house arrest. His family is completely broken about it. He has two younger siblings-- 8th & 9th grade.
post #18 of 61
One neice and one nephew (different sisters are the Moms). Both were intelligent, charming, fantastic kids. Nephew especially seems to have done permanant damage to his brain, so that even when he isn't using, he isn't the same person he was/could have been. Both Moms have sought help; done everything they could. It's just so sad.
post #19 of 61
My BIL is on trial for dealing. His family is in denial - "the police are picking on him", "the states attorney is holding a grudge because (BIL) used to tease him when they were kids", blah blah blah. It makes me mad and sad at the same time.
post #20 of 61
My dad was a Meth addict for a large part of my childhood, it led him to start physically and mentally and verbally abusing me, my mom and my brother. He never got arrested, or even caught. When my parents got divorced he went away for a long time and got cleaned up, he's better now. I was terrified of him for a long time.

All of my dad's (ex) friends, therefore my friends parents, are meth addicts, a very good friend of my dad's died of a meth overdose 6 years ago, but not before he got crazy paranoid. One day he walked out to his yard (in the country) and started shooting into a tree...we're still not sure of the reason...once he said the birds were laughing at him, then he decided the police/FBI was in the tree watching him. My best friends mom died of heart failure at the age of 45, the drs think her years of drug addiction weaked her heart to that point. My aunt still is a drug user (I think).

It's a terrible addiction, it effects a person so much driving them to do things they never would normally (like my dad beating my brother and I)

I'm sorry you are having to deal with it.
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