I just wasn't quick enough

[splash]

There is this guy who works in the sam building as I. He and his wife were expecting their first child, a boy.
This kid was due in May. I swear.
I wanted to put some pamphlets from nocirc on his car. I didn't want to confront him, but I wanted to give him the info.
Well we're moving offices in a week or so, and I really didn't want to do it until we moved. Because just in case they found out it was me, I didn't want an awkward situation. Plus my boss' son is circ'ed and his wife defends it to the death (even though she is so 'natural family living' about everything else, AND subscribes to mothering!) and I just didn't want it becoming an issue.
Well on Friday I printed them out and was going to put them on his car. But then he was gone by the time I left.
Well the baby was born on Monday. So if it's done, it's done.

But I just didn't get the info to him fast enough because I was worried about my damn job. And now I feel like shit. We've just got such overwhelming medical bills right now that I cannot risk my job for ANYTHING. Even though nothing would have happened probably, I could not risk it. So maybe this little boy is cut because of that.

[twins10705]

There may be a chance he isn't done yet, even if they are planning to. At least in Arizona, insurance won't cover circ anymore, so you have to take the baby to your pediatrician and pay $400 to get it done.

[Velvet005]

I agree there is a chance it wasn't done yet. Not everyone has it done at the hospital. I've actually heard of quite a few who have been done at the ped's office at the one week visit.

[ChristaN]

I'm in the same spot with the fear of losing my job issue, Estelle. I was teaching a class for NICU parents last week and one mom and I were talking before class got going. I was asking if they knew when their son would be discharged and, as she was mentioning the things they needed before he came home (feeding issues, etc.), she said that they would probably be able to circ him the next day.

While I did mention that they didn't have to do it, I didn't push it any further when they insisted that circ was necessary. I am really uncomfortable with not questioning people's misinformation, but I also know that I would be risking my job by advocating for something that the hospital has no formal position on and believes is best left up to parents.

Heck, I changed pediatricians in part b/c the nurse at dd's ped's office told me that I would be dooming a son to a life of ridicule and poor hygiene if I didn't circ (before we knew what dd #2 was). I complained to the office and let them know that was part of the reason we were leaving -- I just disagreed with this nurse on too many different issues and didn't appreciate her constant advocacy on those issues (such as how I was doing dds a disservice by breastfeeding b/c my milk was "inadequate" as a vegan, etc.). I worry that a parent will do the same thing and I will be out a job, which we too cannot afford especially since dh is out of work right now.

However, I do intend to have a discussion with my boss in the near future to see if there is anything that I can say that would come across as more like providing both sides in case they hadn't heard the other side of the issue. This mom seemed pretty AP otherwise and I would hate to see her circ b/c she thought it was necessary only to find out later that it wasn't and me to have been the person who didn't give her the info when I could have. It is hard to draw the line of where you CYA and where you risk it.

[2lilsweetfoxes]

((hugs))
I kinda understand where you are coming from. My boss--though I'm an E4, I answer directly to an O3--and his wife just had a little boy. I don't know the lad's status, and don't want to know. I didn't bring it up because I felt that if they were adamantly for circing, I didn't want to know so that I wouldn't "lose respect" for my boss. I mean, I'd still have to respect the rank, but its hard to work well for someone you don't respect. And the time just never seemed right to bring it up.

[morning glory]

While I did mention that they didn't have to do it, I didn't push it any further when they insisted that circ was necessary. I am really uncomfortable with not questioning people's misinformation, but I also know that I would be risking my job by advocating for something that the hospital has no formal position on and believes is best left up to parents.

Being a hospital they should have no problem with you handing out copies of the AAP statement...and be sure to point out or highlight the part about "not recommended".

Casey

[morning glory]

Oh and Estelle...I feel for you. I think we've all been there. Its so hard to know when you are crossing a line and if you should cross it or not.

Sure you could make the argument that its baby's bodily integrity on the line and you should do whatever it takes but unfortunately thats not the way most of our society sees it. You do still have to look after yourself.

I'd say still send the info...you never know.

Casey