What do you wish you would have known beforehand? - Page 2

[MamaRabbit]

That the person taking photos is allowed to take graphic photos.

That the person doing the birth laundry knows how to work the machine.

[SusannahM]

I wish someone had laid down the law and made me LAY DOWN and SLEEP after giving birth. I was wired, I was walking around, talking to my family, eating lunch, etc. The baby was sleeping. That was the last time in like the first 2 weeks of her life that her sleeping didn't require an hour of rocking for it to happen. It would have been nice for me to have taken advantage of the babe's long sleep after the birth.

I wish we would have made a list of what to do if labor wasn't progressing well. I had a lot of things in mind, and even had my notes with the stack of stuff for the birth, but I totally forgot about the reflexology things until about 15 hours into labor. Once DH started using the right pressure points on my feet, boom, everything started happening, and 3 hours later I had the baby in my arms.

One thing that was extremely helpful for me was to have the Depends type underpants for after the birth. Wearing regular panties was much too painful, those things were great.

There's a thread about herbs to help you heal down there after birth. I'm going to use that useful advice next time, wish I'd had it before.

I so wish I'd known about the nipple shells for flat nipples before the birth and that flat nipples would make breastfeeding much harder, no one knew I had them or thought to ask. Just wanted to mention that in case anyone else has the same thing and doesn't know about the shells!

The only other thing I can think of is that I wish I'd asked the midwife how to take the clip off of the umbilical cord, because DD started messing with it before the midwife came back to check on us about 4 days later. I could have just taken the clip off once the umbilical cord had dried out a little a day or two after the birth, instead what happened was DD grabbed a hold of the clip and ripped it and her cord stump off (wasn't a huge deal, but she bled a little).

[StacyL]

Originally Posted by SusannahM

One thing that was extremely helpful for me was to have the Depends type underpants for after the birth. Wearing regular panties was much too painful, those things were great.

:

I also used the Depends underwear because pads were too painful.

Also, stuffing ice into the liner of a newborn-size disposable diaper and putting that in your shorts for 10 minutes helps a lot with pain & swelling.

[CrunchyKat]

What I loved most was my yoga ball! I got one that was in more of an egg shape. I can't even start to tell you what it did for me. I was having back labor and rocking back and fourth on that ball worked wonders. I don't think I could have gotten through it without it. Also, someone already said this, but having meals already cooked and frozen were super convienent to just pop in the oven. I also froze pads and had stocked up on lots and lots of TUCKS and dermoplast for uh, down there, afterwards.

[PancakeGoddess]

I wish I had known:

1. support is good, but ultimately no one else can labor for me. I had to get upright and DO IT.

2. inviting more people to the labor/birth can be a very bad idea. Each person who arrived slowed my contractions. I had way too many people in my house.

[courtenay_e]

To be serious about all aspect of my transfer of care plan. Dd was to be cared for by my sister who was my photographer. I wanted the photographer at the hospital, so had to scramble to find someone (ended up calling my dad home from work) to take care of her. I had to rush around between contractions (every four minutes) to fill my hospital bag and forgot everything (shampoo, deoderant, my non-antibacterial sensitive skin body soap, my sensitive skin no scent lotion, my nursing bra, my TOOTHBRUSH!). Not fun. So, especially because it's not likely you'll have to use it, have a plan, and a hospital bag, ready!

[eirual]

Have an Enema handy (my little piece of heaven and c-section preventer )- my midwife asked her coleague to bring one after I requested one since hers was expired.

Bowel Buddies (Bran wafers) were truly my best buddies, better than stool softeners for me

I'll definitely get a tub next time around.

[Sea_Gal]

Great Question OP

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[Pandora114]

If you are expecting "Unwanted Visitors" that the local police department is your friend (considering if Homebirth is legal in your area) Call em up when you're lucid, and say "umm I'm in the throes of labour, I'm having a planned homebirth and for some reason people I told to not come by, are coming by anyway and I really would like assistance in keeping them away" The cops will show up and stand sentry.

[faeriewisp]

I wish I would have known how different my natural contractions would feel compared to the pitocin induced ones during my first birth. Then maybe I would have realized how far into it I was and set up the camera! We got no pictures of the 7 hour home labor/birth!

I wish someone would have told me that delivering the placenta wasn't always painless. Mine was very painful, the contractions were INTENSE and I freaked out transition-like.

WHen your baby is coming right through your pelvis it is quite possible that you will lose sound of the heartbeat. Yes push that baby out but don't let anyone, even your midwife, make you stress about it being an emergency situation. After not finding the heartbeat my mw said ominously "Gotta get that baby outta there!" and I thought she meant immediately. Here I was, desperately trying to push even though I wasn't having a contraction, which is a waste of energy. SHe finally asked me if I was having a contraction and I said no, and she said "only push with the contraction."

I also wish I had talked to the baby less when she first came out. I was anxious to hear the first healthy cry/gurgle, and was worried when she didn't make a noise, so I kept saying come on, take a breath, it's ok. But she was fine. Some of 'em don't cry, especially waterbirths. I was too worried.

I think the reason I tore was because I didn't spead my legs apart far enough.

[tash11]

Originally Posted by jlpolzin

I wish I would have made it perfectly clear to my husband where the birthing supplies were and how they were to be used. Our birth ended up being unassisted, so it would have been helpful for him to know what a receiving blanket was used for and where to find it!

definatly, I only had a few hours after my husband got home (its amazing what sex will do for labour) before I went into labour so we never got to this and I remember trying to tell my midwife "its over theeeerrreee" and my poor husband knew less then she did about where anything was.


also something soft to kneel on. like one of those gardening pads or something. I was in my shower for a while and my knees hurt and it made my legs very difficult to use after a bit.

[BCmamaof6]

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[CityGirl]

I wish I had known:

-that VBAC contractions can feel extra-specially painful because of scar tissue and adhesions (only learned this after the birth). They felt like jagged glass being dragged from my incision site to my cervix.

-how much privacy I would want. Even in my own apartment, with a birth team completely of my choosing, I felt OBSERVED. When I spent hours alone in the bathroom, I felt vaguely guilty. The amount I wanted to be alone was a total surprise to me.

Oh, I also wish I'd picked out some real get-up-and-get-rocking music. I remember my husband putting on Joni MItchell "Blue" while I was pushing and it was exactly the WRONG thing.

[tori4man]

Your house will be a mess!

I wish I didn't have so many people at my birth. I felt like there were camera flashes everywhere at the most uncomfortable times.

I wish I knew that my house was going to be a disaster afterward.

I wish someone told me more about what was going on while I was in labor. I had the whole routine memorized but during labor it was hard to concentrate on the passing of time or what stage I might be in. I felt like I needed more feedback.

There were some challanges but having a homebirth is really incredible.

Tori

[USAmma]

Originally Posted by tori4man

I wish I didn't have so many people at my birth. I felt like there were camera flashes everywhere at the most uncomfortable times.

I wish I knew that my house was going to be a disaster afterward.

I wish someone told me more about what was going on while I was in labor. I had the whole routine memorized but during labor it was hard to concentrate on the passing of time or what stage I might be in. I felt like I needed more feedback.

There were some challanges but having a homebirth is really incredible.

Tori

Tori did you have a doula? I just attended a homebirth and me and the doula helped to clean up the house, remove stains from the carpet, do a couple of loads of laundry, start a load of dishes, and even set up the changing table next to the bed with little diapers, wipes and clothing changes so mama didn't need to get out of bed that often.

[ZanZansMommy]

Originally Posted by rere

Oh, and some of the best advice that i took was to not look at the clock.

BINGO!.. Do NOT look at any clocks. In fact tell you MW you want them turned off or turned away from you asap. I found they only hindered me b/c I started getting frustrated at how long it was taking (DD birth)

[tori4man]

I did not have a doula and my friends and family had been there all day so by the time I had her near midnight they went home. Having a doula sounds like really good advice!

[Aka mommy]

I wish i had known that I would want privacy. Everytime I was watched or with my family or dd my labor would slow down. Being alone with just dh and I sped up the labor.

I didnt know this and my midwives are AWESOME so im sharing these tips I didnt know with my other hossy birth:

Olive oil for meconium, works SOOO much better then the petroleum.
Comfrey tea, go buy some comfrey leaves and brew your own tea. There are a few things you can do with it after the birth. 1. Drink the tea asap after you give birth. Its the best thing i've ever tasted in my life and just replenshes you. 2. Drink it when ever you are latching dc on to nurse and also when ever you get the after pains. The tea somehow soothes those nasty afterpains. 3. Put it in the peri bottle at room temp.and spray after every bathroom visit for the first few days. 4. Put it on maxi pads then freeze, ohh heaven lol!

And I wish I had known that pitocen induced contractions are so different then natural ones ( i would have believed i was in labor). And lastly I wish I had known that I wasnt the only one who felt like I couldnt do it or get past the pain of transistion! And that just because I felt that way doesnt mean I failed! Good luck momma, you'll do wonderful!

[Niamh]

subbing!

[kindergirl77]

I wish I would've know with my first:

-the shower progressed my labor very quickly.

-have some positive thoughts written out and posted on your fridge: like "my body with open like a flower as my baby slips out". very helpful!

-have someone designated to take pictures. You'll be glad to look at it afterwards, even if you don't show anyone the crotch shots!

-cover your bed with fresh sheets on the bottom, a plastic tarp over the fresh sheets, with old sheets on top of the plastic. Very easy clean up.

-take off your bed skirt. I forgot to and it got bloody.

-Using Goldenseal powder only - on the baby's umbilical stump- it fell off in 3 days. Not like the 2 weeks it took with alcohol on dd1

-please have someone to come help your older children after the birth- even if you have to hire someone like a pp doula. Your dh will be tired too.

-pack a hospital bag for your homebirth in an emergency- and don't forget to pack socks and shoes (which I had none to go home in after transporting)

- also pack things for the baby in your hospital bag - I gave birth at home, but had to transport with the baby and I had nothing packed in my emergency bag for her- no diapers, wipes, extra clothes or anything and the stoopid hospital had nothing because they wouldn't put me in the OB ward with the other moms/babies because the baby wasn't a 'patient' since she was a homebirth, so they put me in a general room. They didn't even have pp pads for me until my mw raised hell with them.