am i the only one not cosleeping?

[oliversmum2000]

i am starting to wonder weather it is just me

i slept with ds 1 for about 3 years and he gradually moved to own bed, ds 2 starting sleeping alone about age 2 but sophie does now.

one night i noticed she was tired around 6pm so i fed her and decided instead of putting her into my bed i would put her in her own cot so she could have some peace (the 2 boys have a tendency to run straight into my room at bedtime and jump on the bed and i didnt want sophie jumped on)

she was fine with this and that night slept till about 6am, she was about 3 1/2 months then, now she generally sleeps from 6pm - 7.30pm right up until anywhere between 5am - 7am. when she wakes i alwasy bring her in with me for a feed and cuddle.

i just feel a bit weird.

as soon as she does need me i get right up and bring her to me but she sems so happy to sleep on her own and i have to confess getting 7 - 8 hours of solid sleep a night agrees with me, but part of me worries we are mssing out on important bonding.

however when we were cosleeping she regularly vomited all over both of us and the bed, she doesnt do that when she sleeps alone

in the day i carry her loads and respond as quickly as i can bearing in mind she has 2 brothers.

just wanted to know if anyone else has found solo sleeping suits their babe.

[Turtlemum]

We're still sleeping together...

I say follow your baby. She's happy (and gets a bonus morning cuddle - what a wonderful way to wake up!) and you're sleeping well. If it wasn't working for one of you or both maybe reconsider but that doesn't seem to be the case for you.

Kelli

PS My sister planned to cosleep with both her babies and the babies decided they like sleeping nearby but not with her!

[CNutty]

I too say follow your babe, my ds at 4m, just was not sleeping well with us, he was up and trying to play all the time. The first night I layed him down in his crib to sleep, he slept all night and woke up happy as a clam in the morning! I miss sleeping with him, but we too do the morning nurse and cuddle in the bed!

[persephone3]

thanks for starting this thread. i just put alice in her own crib last night, and she slept longer than she has in weeks. (10 pm - 5 am) the sleep agrees with me, too. baby and i just returned from a 3 1/2 week trip to texas, and i was exhausted last night. plus, my husband was eager for some alone time with me. i didn't think alice would stay asleep, but she did. i feel weird about it, too, like she's laying in there all alone and abandoned. but i guess she feels fine about it, and that's important, too. i still plan to bring her to bed with me in the mornings like i did today.

[mkoontz]

We have a waterbed, so I've never co-slept which I'm sad about, but what can you do..... I sidecar'd the crib for a while, but then dh complained as he couldn't put her down for a nap (and couldn't use our bed cause it is a waterbed) so now she's right near me but in her crib.

In an interesting turn of events I recently slept with her - we have a sleepout with a double bed and when I'm really pissed of with dh, I sleep out there : - but anyway both her and I got less sleep by lots.

But this is Aveena the sleepless baby we're talking here . She's still waking every 2-3 hrs.

[iris0110]

Tharen sleeps in his swing at night, same as Kearnan did at that age. They both had reflux (Tharen still does) and the upright position helps with that. Tharen also seems to get really congested in bed with us. I don't know what we will do in a few months when he no longer fits in the swing. Kearnan stopped needing it at 6 months and moved to bed with us full time (where he still is unless Dh sleeps with him in his bedroom). I don't know if that will work for Tharen or not. If not I suppose we will have to invest in a crib.

[Panthira]

Greyson sleeps in his Amby at night, but wakes up around 4 or 5 am and I sleepily put him in bed with me to nurse, so he's a part-time co-sleeper.

[IncaMama]

you're not alone. DS (3yo) still needs to sleep with someone, but i am no longer the best someone to sleep with because i have these distracting boobs. LOL he can't sleep well bc he's so obsessed with nursing these days. so DH sleeps with DS upstairs in bed.

DD and I sleep downstairs...she's in her moses basket on an ottoman and i'm on the recliner. sometimes i'll fall asleep with her nursing on my lap or with her on my chest but she doesn't really like that so she wakes up quickly until i put her back in her basket. then she's all "ahhhhhhh." LOL

[judybean]

We're a part-time co-sleepin family right now. Lucy will go down fine in her cradle (right by my side of the bed) and sleep for quite a while in there. When she wakes, I sleepily put her on the boob while laying on my side and she nurses until she falls asleep. If I wake a bit later, I'll move the sleeping Louie back to her cradle. Thus the night goes for us. Some nights I don't always move her back, but some I do because dh gets nervous with little babies in the bed he says. But he said that before and Kather slept in our bed until just about four weeks before Lucy was born!

[Minoh]

We're still co-sleeping - it seems the only way for me to get any sleep at all! We have a crib side-carred now, but Simon will sleep in it only very briefly at night for his first stretch of sleep. I also nurse him to sleep in the crib for at least 1 nap a day if I can. He's still waking frequently at night and I think co-sleeping is partly responsible for that, but at this point it's the only option that works for us.

We actually tried not co-sleeping for 2 nights because I thought that maybe our movement and sleep noises were waking Simon more frequently than he otherwise would. So we put a futon mattress in the other room to sleep there. Well, the experiment didn't even last an hour that first night because Simon kept nursing to sleep but waking after 10min! The first couple of times he fell asleep I'd try to sneak away, like with naps, but then he woke right up again. Then I tried lying there until he was in a deep sleep. After about 5 wake-ups I pulled him next to me and cradled him in my arms. He farted then fell asleep on his own right away. It was pretty cute, but needless to say, the co-sleeping continued after that night.

If your baby sleeps better on their own, then definitely follow their lead and don't feel bad at all, mama!

[MinnieMouse]

Ben sleeps in a cosleeper next to my bed. He historically sleeps about 10pm-5am or so but in the last few weeks woke at about 2 or 3am to nurse.

Once he wakes to nurse I bring him into bed and fall asleep nursing him.

W/ Bethany, she slept in her swing from about 1mo to about 6mo or so. I beat myself up about it for a long time until I figured out that SHE was sleeping & happy and WE were sleeping & happy...so everything was fine.

I believe AP means meeting my child's needs. If my child sleeps better in a crib or somewhere other than my bed...then doesn't make me less of an AP parent...it makes me MORE of one.

[wirewendy]

Every baby is different

I co-sleep, but my neighbor upstairs has a daughter who is 2, and even though they had hoped for a snuggly little baby, from the get-go she wanted to sleep alone. It is hilarious! At a year and a half she had her own room, and now even tells them to get out and leave her alone. She is by no means a loner. She is the most social little girl I have ever met, is incredibly smart, and can already count to 10.

So don't feel bad! It sounds like your daughter does better on her own.

[aisraeltax]

we co-sleep but i have been considering trying to get Ethan into the pack and play at night (its beside our bed...why? i guess so i can have somewhere to store cd's, etc. how ridiculous is that?).
but with my back bothering me, i have been trying to get him out of the bed. i am in so much pain and he thrashes around. i havent minded up until now but he really is taking up 1/2 the bed and with my back like it is now, i just cant sleep in the distorted positions i have been sleeping in.
makes me sad and feel like a failure, but ive got to get him to sleep at least part of the night out of our bed. (we only have a queen and no chance of getting a king)>

[xkoliex]

Tori and I did co-sleep for quite some time. I was paranoid about SIDS and her reflux issues. But then she started rolling over in her sleep and since I have a twin sized bed, she had no room to roll anywhere except right into me! She didn't like that too much and would wake up every time screaming bloody murder.
I could always calm her down though, but one night she almost rolled out of the bed (I had gotten up to get a drink and a snack) and thats when Chris yelled at me to put her in the crib.
SO we put her in her crib now to sleep at night. I didn't sleep well for a week. I keep thinking something was going to happen because she wasn't next to me and I couldn't hear her breathe.
Every now and then she gets the strength to smack her head against the crib (no bumper because of SIDS issues, I'll put it in after she's 6 mo old) but she goes right back to sleep after I turn her back over onto her tummy.

[oliversmum2000]

thanks everyone

you knwo the weird thing last night all the kids woke about 11pm so i slept with all of them in the big bed we have which is made from 4 double matresses (2 matresses side by side and 2 deep) the boys had one matress and sophie and i had the other!

so much for not cosleeping!

back to normal tonighti think!

[anonymous4_20]

We're not co-sleeping either. I have serious shoulder problems and can't nurse side-lying for very long. I also need to be propped up in bed with various pillows and there's just not enough room for all 3 of us in there.

That said, I did kick DH out of bed for the 4 month growth spurt. I decided that I'd rather sleep and have sore shoulders than not sleep and still be sore because I was tired. We sometimes do a co-sleeping nap during our morning nursing session, too.

[DesireeH]

We are half co-sleepers. When Jevin was little we could go dtd elsewhere so we would just leave Jevin in our bed and go elsewhere. Well now we kinda need our bedroom cause we have an older kid who could come out at any moment. LOL So on dtd nights (which have been the last 5 nights, LOL) we start Daph in her crib (in our room) and then transfer her over later when/if she wakes up (she usually doesnt for at least 6 hours.) She is my super easy baby......I can lay her down awake and she will just happily suck her thumb to sleep.

[Rowan Tree]

My baby has never liked co-sleeping. This morning we tried because he woke up at 4am, but he screamed and screamed! Hates it--can't figure out why

[oliversmum2000]

Originally Posted by meggie

My baby has never liked co-sleeping. This morning we tried because he woke up at 4am, but he screamed and screamed! Hates it--can't figure out why

[wawoof]

I just wanted to agree with the PPs about following your baby's and entire family's needs.

We coslept with Ethan until I was 7mo preg with Galen, at which point Ethan's flailing about was really interrupting my very limited sleep and he was kicking my belly. Ethan was also really into big boy stuff, so we asked if he'd like his own big boy bed (in our room) and he was enthusiastic about it. After we got his bed, he usually slept in it, but often wanted DH to snuggle with him a lot. This was fine with us, since he was transitioning from co-sleeping to sleeping by himself. Since Galen has been born, he's been in a sidecar crib (with the side by our bed removed), but after 2mo if he woke up, I brought him in bed with me to side-lying nurse/sleep with him. And Ethan sometimes sleeps in our bed part of the night but we always make sure there is an adult between him and Galen. So, any number of arrangements can be fine and work for different families. I hope to move both DSs to their own room together when Galen is around 2, but we'll just have to gauge their rediness as time passes.