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I think something is wrong with Violet - Page 2

post #21 of 74
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally posted by joesmom
does violet make eye contact with you & obey simple instructions?? does she know her colors?
Yes to simple instructions, no to her colors...

She does sort really well (by color/shape).

The appt. went well. I have a referral for a hearing test (not until March 18 ug! and for a speech eval.)

I'll keep you posted

Thanks everyone once again.

Jesse
post #22 of 74
(((warm thoughts)))

ds did not speak well until 3.5-4 years old (at least to others, we could generally figure out that flrflr meant balloon, etc LOL)

hearing quality was not a concern with him, so not at all the same situation as yours, but because he was SO FRUSTRATED that his ideas were not being understood we started using sign language when he was about 18 months. just regular ASL, the simple signs like "milk" "more" "banana" "no" for things he would normally point and grunt about and then get upset because we weren't getting it. the tantrumming literally stopped, it was pretty amazing, and he was forming sentences through sign...

that may not be something that fits with what you are pursuing, but i thought i'd throw it out there!
post #23 of 74
indiegirl, I hope you will get some answers when you take Violet to her hearing test. Another mama here thinking good thoughts for your dd.
post #24 of 74
I can really understand the concern. We have some similar issues with Sam, but with him, I think that he is just ignoring us.

I am glad you got the appointment even if it feels like a million years away.

My friend's son was three before he even utterred anything but a grunt or a whine. He just didn't feel the need to talk. He also had a big sister who would talk for him a good bit of the time, so that may have had something to do with it. Now you can't stop him from talking.

I will think positive thoughts for you.
post #25 of 74
Hey, indiegirl, hang in there. Just wanted to say, don't worry about colors, I've read that kids aren't expected to really know their colors until age 4, and those who know them before do so just because they've been actively coached.
Hope all goes well with the hearing test!
post #26 of 74
Good luck with the hearing test... I was one of those "late bloomers". I was four years old before anyone realized that I wasn't talking. I had two older sisters to do it for me. My grandmother finally realized in church one sunday that I could not hear her if I was looking away. A hearing test revealed total hearing loss in my left ear. Probably due to German measles with a fever of over 105 at nine months. I have never had a hearing aid or anything else. Once my family was made aware and I started speech therapy, I haven't shut up since!! Everything will work out the way it should.
post #27 of 74
My older DD had speech delays and our Dr. sent her for hearing tests when she was 2. At the time, I thought it was sort of silly because I felt she could hear just fine and was learning to talk at her own rate. During the hearing test it was obvious that she could hear very, very little. It was all that I could do to not just sit there are cry.

She had chronic fluid in her ears (the ENT monitored her for a few months) and we had tubes put in. She had about six months of private speech therapy, starting when she turned 3. By the time she was 5, her speech was caught up with her peers.

What I learned.....

hearing test don't hurt. It is much better to get one and find out everything is OK than to stick you head in the sand.

the sooner a speech problem is caught, the easier it is to deal with. Many kids like my older DD end up in school before anyone does anything, and they far more intervention to catch up with their peers.

Some kids need to be pushed to reach their potential. A good therapist can find ways to do this and make it seem like a game.

If your child has a speech delay -- HAVE THEIR HEARING CHECKED. There is a lot of ground between deaf and perfect hearing. Just because your child isn't deaf, it doesn't mean that they can hear well enough to develop normally.
post #28 of 74
Thread Starter 
I'm pretty convinced it's a hearing loss. Last night we were sort of sitting in a triangle (dh on couch, V on the ground playing and I was at the desk). I had told Mike to talk to V but not to move (because she notices movement). He asked her if she wanted to take a bath (she loves to bathe). He asked her in a normal voice if she wanted to take a bath. Nothing. Again he asked...nothing. She had her back to me and I asked her if she wanted a "sweet." Nothing. Now, these are her two favorite things. I whistled. Nothing.

Then Mike moved and raised his voice, asking her about the bath...She looked at him and said yes.

I feel like crap because now that I am facing this I am realizing the signs are there! Um, how often do I have to raise my voice, clap, snap just to get her attention? Hello! The friggin signs are there, why didn't I see them before??????????

I am mad at myself tonight.

Jesse
post #29 of 74
(((jesse)))

oh, i can feel the pain in your words. don't be too hard on yourself; you can see now there is a problem & you will be right on top of it to fix it. if violet's hearing has always been less than perfect, that is probably why you didn't notice, kwim? like, you ALWAYS had to work harder maybe to get her attention, so harder seemed normal to you. does that make sense? keep us updated on violet, she is a cutie pie!

love, jenny
post #30 of 74
Still here thinking good thoughts for you and V....try not to be too hard on yourself...V seems very lucky to me to have a momma that loves her so...and wouldn't a part of you be a little relieved? To know what the issue is. and to have it be something you can DO something with...but perhaps it is too soon for that...there must be other emotions too...gosh, Indiegirl, I don't know what to say... ((hug))
post #31 of 74
(((((indiegirl)))))) don't kick yourself - interpreting signs from our kids, esp the oldest, is really hard because we know there's heaps of variation and we love learning the individuality of our children, and celebrating who they are, giving them room to develop at their own pace
post #32 of 74
{{{{jesse and violet}}}}}

Oh I'm so sorry, you must feel so awful! I can tell you to not blame yourself, but I'd prolly do the same thing, and I guess you know this is not your fault. We just don't assume that something is "wrong" with a happy apparently healthy child, and I can totally imagine that you attributed a lot of seemingly strange things to her getting used to Zoe growing in your belly and being born and all...

Partial hearing loss is not great, of course, but I think there's also a lot they can do. It seems like she can hear, so a hearing aid may solve a big part of the problem.

Wishing you both the very best... and sending you some LOUD vibes!
post #33 of 74
Indiegirl;
Sending you lots of caring thoughts your way.... I just spotted this thread, can I chime in? I have a lot of experience with speech delays (two boys with this problem!). We have discovered the very best video for signing (and my boys are hearing, but avid signers now too) called "Signing Time". Please check out their website. It is the best one I have yet seen, and Violet will love it! My smallest ds asks to watch it by signing "Boy! Boy!" for a snappy tune played at the end.
Take care of that beautiful girl.
We are thinking of you!
post #34 of 74
Sweetie, everything will be ok!

So what's the worst case senerio? That Violet is completely deaf? Well then what? You learn sign language......Which in and of itself is a beautiful, poetic language, and very expressive! It may be harder for an adult to just pick it up, but you will!!!!

I know right now it just seems so overwhelming, I just wanted to send you big hugs...it's hard when we come to realize that our child may not be "perfect" by society standards, but that doesn't mean she isn't perfect to you. She was given to you to care for, to love, to cherish...you are doing that! She was perfectly designed for your family, she is the perfect addition to you!

My best friend is deaf, we've known eachother for a long time. I think the only mistake her parents made was making her feel as if she were different, she hated that. She just wanted to be the same. Her parents also didn't learn much sign language, just enough to barely get by...I know more sign than they do.

Also, there is another deaf mama here on the boards, if you do find out that Violet is deaf, it might help to get her perspective on the deaf community and the hurdles she had to overcome growing up deaf.

Oh, and most children aren't diagnosed with hearing loss until they are 2 or 3 (sometimes older) a lot of parents would have missed it. It wasn't something you were actively looking for....of course you missed it. That doesn't make you a less attatched mama
post #35 of 74
Hi Jesse,

I'm also late to the game here, but here goes.

I'm a speech pathologist who, for 12 years, specialized in working with 1 to 6 year olds with language and speech delays. Because I'm fluent in sign language, I also saw most of the kids with hearing loss in our clinic (whether the kids needed to learn sign language or not!). Many, many, many, many kids are diagnosed with hearing loss between 2 and 4 years old - many. If she was profoundly deaf (can't hear anything at all), I'm sure you would have noticed by now. Mild to moderate hearling losses are difficult to detect becfause they do look like "selective hearing."

And - if it makes you feel any better, or at least not alone, I have a ds (8 y.o.) who (long story) was born with severe congenital heart defects and has had long term repercussions in his motor and sensory development. Even though I had worked with occupational therapists for years, and all the signs were there of motor and sensory delays, I didn't get him evaluated until he was almost 4! Yes! It's true!

I also realized, after he started therapy how much *I* had compensated for him. I automatically did everything for him, but didn't even realize I was doing it! BTW, occupational therapy was a fantastic experience for him. He went for 1 1/2 years when he was little. Then, he started again last summer (at almost 8y.o.), and was just discharged again because he met all his goals. I've learned *so much* from this experience - and believe me, it's made me a better and much more understanding therapist!

To RileysMom - If you feel uncomfortable with any therapist, please find another who fits with you and your dc. There are as many styles of therapy as there are therapists. I actually had parents who were uncomfortable with me because I *didn't* force their kids to say and do things!
:

Keep us posted - Laura
post #36 of 74
<I'm SO not trying to hijack this thread, so I hope this isn't wrong to post our experience here>

We had our first meeting with the ECI speech therapist this past week and it went really well. Basically, the ST was very low key and relaxed. Played with Riley and talked to her alot. (which is what I do all day anyways!) She did mention that alot of time kids get "sound words" first...like "boom, whee, zoom, etc..." and Riley has added a couple to her list...she LOVES, "wheeeee" and uses it as much as possible. And the boo part of peek a boo. The ST said she doesn't think she'll be working with her long, (i.e. she thinks she'll progress quickly)

So, I was pleased....

Just sharing....
post #37 of 74
((((indiegirl))))

still thinking about you guys ~ waiting sucks!!

and totally OT but: signing time ROCKS!!!!!! my ds and his friends LOVE it, i honestly think it's one of the best kids' videos period, whether they *need* to learn ASL or not! here's the website signing time


ok enough raving on my part keep us posted, indiegirl, and i completely ditto everyone else in that you are the BEST MAMA for your girl!! my ds is almost five and i notice things about him all the time that i never saw before!
post #38 of 74
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally posted by RileysMom
<I'm SO not trying to hijack this thread, so I hope this isn't wrong to post our experience here>

We had our first meeting with the ECI speech therapist this past week and it went really well. Basically, the ST was very low key and relaxed. Played with Riley and talked to her alot. (which is what I do all day anyways!) She did mention that alot of time kids get "sound words" first...like "boom, whee, zoom, etc..." and Riley has added a couple to her list...she LOVES, "wheeeee" and uses it as much as possible. And the boo part of peek a boo. The ST said she doesn't think she'll be working with her long, (i.e. she thinks she'll progress quickly)

So, I was pleased....

Just sharing....
By all means, please post your experience here! I'm so glad the speech therapy went well. I don't think you posted, but is your child hard of hearing?

What do they say about delayed speech when hearing isn't a problem? (Causes, treatment...etc.)

Jesse
post #39 of 74
Indiegirl;
Your girls are so beautiful they catch my breath. Thanks for sharing the pics.
In our case, the delayed speech is strongly hereditary, there is no hearing loss. It is a long story, and it seems hotly debated as to the 'right' way to handle it.
Learning some ASL has been a blessing to all of us. My smallest can really communicate with what language he currently has. We can read a book together, and today he pointed out the 'mama elephant, the baby elephant, and the daddy elephant'. His vocabulary is at LEAST as rich as any toddler, maybe more so.
If Violet ends up with a slight hearing loss, there are ALL kinds of things that can be done.
WE are all rooting for you!
post #40 of 74
Oh yes, sign language helped us alot also. He picked it up really fast. And you know what, not long after he learned the sign, he would say the word....go figure. We just learned a few basics like....please, thank you, book, more, all done, finished. I taught them to my second son right off the bat and he just loved it. It sure helps them to communicate with you and not get so frustrated sometimes.
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