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IVF in May - Page 11

post #201 of 220
Originally Posted by Leslie in Chicago

I don't have words.
post #202 of 220
Oh, Leslie.

post #203 of 220
I just want o bawl now I am so sorry.
post #204 of 220
Oh, Leslie, Honey. I am so sorry.

Dammit. I hate this week.
post #205 of 220
Leslie. I'm so sorry. Actually what I want to say is : I'm so so so sorry.
post #206 of 220
I am so sorry, Leslie :
post #207 of 220
Wow- I'm sorry for you. I just experienced the same thing, and I know there's really nothing to say.
post #208 of 220
Thread Starter 
thanks so much, everybody.

so...the first hour we cried. then we watered the lawn. then we ordered in dinner and I got the tiramisu. did I mention red wine? told my mom, cried some more.

still feeling like a deer in headlights. megan & jenn & iberk, I'm sure you know what I mean.

dh said he just can't go through this again -- it's too, too hard. 4 years of trying, including 7 iui's. he's ready to figure out how adoption works. I'm still in a haze.

I love you guys for all the support and understanding. I honestly don't think I could've gotten through the process--and this outcome--without you. You are my circle of angels.
post #209 of 220

I am so sorry Leslie. This just sucks! I remember feeling the daze you speak of. It just doesn't seem real. I wish there was something I could do or say to make it better.
post #210 of 220
Thread Starter 
ok, the "circle of angels" thing is really corny. but you remember in the movie/play Laramie where the friends put on angel wings and block the bigots from the view of Matthew Shepard's family? that's the kind of angel circle I mean. not that you're blocking anything, just that you're here. is this the wine talking?
post #211 of 220
Hi Leslie,

You may not remember me, but I remember you. I am so very sorry for the losses you are feeling right now. Please allow yourself whatever time you need to in order to grieve and process.

Although I am not in your shoes right now, I have walked a similar path knowing all too well the feelings of failure and despair brought on by years of IF, failed IUIs and a heartbreaking failed IVF.

Please know you have the love and support of many people, including those whose words you may only read on a computer screen, but who are living breathing souls sharing in your sadness.

post #212 of 220
Leslie, I don't know what to say. Sometimes I feel it is better not to say anything, just sending lots of hugs to you. :

post #213 of 220

We did three IVFs before we had a pg, so I am all too familiar with the feelings of a failed cycle. Please give yourself all the time you need to grieve and heal. I wish I had some magic wand that I could waive and give us all babies. This whole journey just sucks.

Thinking of you and sending you hugs today.
post #214 of 220
Thread Starter 
thanks, Jenn & Dena and everybody. very much. And hi Hilary! Yes, I do remember you--what a sweet note. I read it like 5 times. You too, vermonttaylors. is there an adoption thread on this website?

ok...Alisa...how goes it? Wasn't your retrieval today? So far we're 0 for 3. C'mon, give us a winner!
post #215 of 220
Love and prayers for Leslie~

Ary, I was so glad to see your name!
post #216 of 220
Any good updates?
post #217 of 220
Thread Starter 
hi Jenn--thanks for asking.

I'm afraid this loss is coming in waves. Dh and I hit the wall this weekend--not with each other, but over what appears to be our inability to get pregnant. 4 years of charting, herbs, acupuncture, diet, 7 IUIs, 1 IVF and not a single positive pregnancy test. And we're "unexplained." Everything works, but no luck. Is it time to stop...to say we tried our best...but we're not among those who give birth. It really, really sucks.

I did call the clinic this morning and complained to someone in charge about our nurse. She was very apologetic and agreed that what we received was bad. We're going to see our RE next Wednesday (soonest available appt) and will tell her about our experiences with the nurse. And if we do decide to use the 2 frozen embies, we'll do it at another clinic.

I hope you and Megan have great results with your FETs!!
post #218 of 220
Leslie, I've been thinking about you, and sending you lots of love and healing Please keep us all informed as to whatever you decide to do, FET, move to adoption, whatever.... we're all here for you. However you end up building your family, it will be YOUR family, and it will be perfect. much love to you my friend, much love.
post #219 of 220

You have been in my thoughts also. Hoping you are healing and that many blessings come your way soon.

Chiromama is absolutely right. It doesn't matter what your path to your family is, it will be your perfect family.

post #220 of 220

It is so hard to have to make all of these decisions. I'm just going to say that IF SUCKS! I know we all know it, but sometimes I just like to say it.

Best of luck with your appointment tomorrow. I'll be thinking of you.
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