Most irritating excuses! Make a list! - Page 2

[ExuberantDaffodil]

"I'm not a nurser"

"That just doesn't apeal to me. It may be natural, but I am not really a natural type person"

"I want my husband to be able to feed the baby in the middle of the night"

"Everyone I know formula feeds and their babies/children are just fine."

"I don't have to, and no one better try to make me, especially the nurses in the hospital" - yes, I heard this.

And about the whole molestation thing - I would never ever dream of denying anyone the pain, frustration, guilt, and scars of being molested as a child. However, the new baby is a new human being with a world of possiblities. I, too, was molested as a child, but when it came to providing for my own child, I had to let many hang ups go - for my own well being and for the well being of my son.

[lauriebeth]

i thought i posted to this before... guess not!

mil said SIL didnt bf b/c she had a different blood type than her baby. My mom laughed in her face & said "laurie beth is a different blood type than me and i bf her!"

[rmzbm]

Originally Posted by ExuberantDaffodil

"I don't have to, and no one better try to make me, especially the nurses in the hospital"

I wouldn't worry too much about that...unfortunatly.

[Desdamona]

"my baby has excema because of my breastmilk... since she's been on soy formula it's starting to clear up a bit... see??" and shows me a baby whose face is riddled with ANGRY looking excema. and who'd just scratched her face which cause it to bleed. I was so sad for this little girl.

[APintheAF]

"He just sucked all the milk out of me."

My cousin used this with her 3mo. She said he wasn't thriving on her milk. Actually, she was leaving him with his grandparents overnight at just a few weeks old. She'd go out and drink/party all night and leave him with formula.
I wonder why...?
??

[Belle]

Originally Posted by APintheAF

"He just sucked all the milk out of me."

I thought that's what they were supposed to do.

[GreenGrrl]

This is one mean-spirited thread

I'm not a frequent poster here and probably won't be welcomed back after saying this, but geez, ladies, this is one mean-spirited thread. Instead of getting all high and mighty about other mother's excuses for not breastfeeding, how about some thoughtful responses to those excuses that might help moms make better choices for themselves and their babies? People accuse the media of creating the "Mommy Wars," but here it is, in black and white, produced by and for mothers themselves.

[Pandora114]

ok: I countered the "Breastfeeding is too much work" excuse the other day with

"OH dear! I'm much too lazy to formula feed! All that sterilizing, mixing, heating, burping after every...single...ounce....worrying about finding a place to heat bottles while out and about, formula spoilage....I found it so much easyer to just breastfeed...especially at night...I was just too lazy and enjoying my sleep to get out and make a bottle...so I just dragged my kid in with me and just opened up the all night snack bar!"

[EvansMomma]

Originally Posted by GreenGrrl

I'm not a frequent poster here and probably won't be welcomed back after saying this, but geez, ladies, this is one mean-spirited thread. Instead of getting all high and mighty about other mother's excuses for not breastfeeding, how about some thoughtful responses to those excuses that might help moms make better choices for themselves and their babies? People accuse the media of creating the "Mommy Wars," but here it is, in black and white, produced by and for mothers themselves.

Thank you for this.

I'm a ff-ing Mommy, not particularly proud of it. I was a staunch breastfeeding advocate prior to having my son, and as much as I knew bf-ing was the right and ONLY way to feed a child, I really was not prepared for the onslaught of emotions after the baby. I was reeling from a really nasty labour experience, had a gaping hole in my episiotomy that was not able to be stitched, I actually didnt' want to be anywhere near my son because all I remember was pain and frustration because I couldn't get him to latch right. One half hour after he was born, the nurse tried to get him to latch on to my breast so we could feed. I told her no way was I formula feeding my son - that was akin to rat poison in my books. So she tried - half heartedly - and I was pretty doped up still from my epi, and getting stitched and poked and prodded. Evan was having trouble latching, and the next thing I knew she put a bottle of formula in my husband's hands and told him to feed the baby the formula, that it was no big deal.

Anyway - this has all been discussed in prior posts from me on here. I tend to stay away from the breastfeeding/lactivism forums because it just brings back up all my guilt about formula feeding. I came into this thread to try to see if I could remember what my "excuse" was at the time. And to be hoenst, I have no idea why I quit. All I know was I was out of my mind, got NO support from either hospital staff or family members - aside from my husband who, bless his soul, was so distraught seeing me so frustrated and out of it that he really had no idea what to do.

I know that I am really a minority on these boards, and I try not to talk about my FFing too too much, since its' just not accepted, and I even to this day know that it was the wrong decision and feel horrible about it. But even though FFing is not looked upon too highly around here, I too think this thread is a bit mean spirited. Yes there are a ton of "stupid excuses", but you know - to those women at that time, they really might have been serious to them. I look back and think to myself "self, you're a punka$$ - lazy and selfish and seriously made a bad decision". Reading threads like this really makes me feel so much worse.

BUT - my reality is what it is at this point. I know better for next time, and I'll be damned if I let ANYTHING stop me with my next babe. But maybe, just maybe, these stupid excuses aren't stupid to the women who are making this choice - and ultimately it IS just that - their choice.

[Quagmire]

Originally Posted by scatterbrainedmom

ohh..just thought of another one

my nipples are too big for his tiny mouth

(the l&d nurse actually told me this with my first)

Argh! I had a friend tell me this!

She also told me that after a case of mastitis her doctor told her she shouldn't breastfeed anymore - ever. Future children included. I told her that was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard, and that she should get a second opinion. So she backed down and admitted she didn't want to breastfeed.

Honestly! :

[Belle]

Originally Posted by GreenGrrl

I'm not a frequent poster here and probably won't be welcomed back after saying this, but geez, ladies, this is one mean-spirited thread. Instead of getting all high and mighty about other mother's excuses for not breastfeeding, how about some thoughtful responses to those excuses that might help moms make better choices for themselves and their babies? People accuse the media of creating the "Mommy Wars," but here it is, in black and white, produced by and for mothers themselves.

Great idea! I'll start with the OP's first couple ones.

1. I didn't make milk (yes, I know some people have low supply - but you don't know this if you "try" at the hospital and then give up)

"I'm sorry you felt this way about your milk supply, what made you feel that you weren't making enough?"

2. I tried it once and didn't like it

"I'm glad that you gave it a try. What didn't you like about it. For the future sometimes it can take a few weeks to get in the swing of things. Sometimes things go well from the start."

3. My dh wants to help feed the baby

"Your dh will have plenty of opportunity to be with the baby without feeding him/her. There are lots of things partners can do to be with baby other than feeding. (bathing, diaper changing, baby wearing etc.)"

4. FF is so good for them with those lipids and stuff (my coworker told me this )

"Formula is a great invention for those babys that can't otherwise breastfeed. But it was made for that purpose. No formula can match the great nutritional benefits of breastfeeding."

5. My boobs are too small/big

"Size shouldn't make a difference in breastfeeding. The differences in breast size are mainly due to fat tissue and not milk producing glands."

6. I had a drug free delivery so I figured I'd done a good thing for baby so I didn't have to nurse him (a church friend said this)

"That's great that you had a drug free delivery!" (I don't know what else to say from here. Anyone else have any ideas)

I'll work on some more.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife

I want to be able to diet and drink/smoke

Diet and drink? That's just brilliant. Don't people know that alcohol has 7 calories a gram?

[Mama Dragon]

My SIL never said it, but she quit breastfeeding so she could start doing drugs again. That's about the lousiest excuse I've ever seen or heard of. (though at least she did bf for 4 weeks, and did at least quit bf before doing drugs)

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by Belle

"That's great that you had a drug free delivery!"

"You really deserve a break. Next time, you should try breastfeeding, it is much easier than formula and will give you more time to just enjoy your baby."

Is that okay? Or does it imply that she doesn't spend enough time with her baby? I was thinking that like going to prepare the bottles and stuff could take up time that could be spent just cuddling, even if the baby's right with her.

[Belle]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

"You really deserve a break. Next time, you should try breastfeeding, it is much easier than formula and will give you more time to just enjoy your baby."

Is that okay? Or does it imply that she doesn't spend enough time with her baby? I was thinking that like going to prepare the bottles and stuff could take up time that could be spent just cuddling, even if the baby's right with her.

That sounds good!

[scatterbrainedmom]

Originally Posted by Synthea™

My SIL never said it, but she quit breastfeeding so she could start doing drugs again.

my sister did too, but told me that was why :

[tasbaby]

My brother's GF just had a baby last night. As I was visiting today and holding the baby (GF was sleeping) I asked my brother why she was FF instead of BF.

The response, "She can't nurse. She has something wrong with her milk ducts and couldn't nurse her DD so we're bottle feeding. Also, since she had all the medication with the C-section the formula is better for the baby."

I behaved myself and told him that she probably didn't have great support when she tried to bf her daughter (18 years ago!) and the medication from the c-section would be OK for the baby.

What I really wanted to do was nurse the little one myself!!

Tina

[shelleyd]

My cousin ff dd#1, felt guilty and so nursed dd#2 for 3 months. Then when she was pregnant with ds, she said, "well bfing is supposed to make babies smarter and dd#1 (who was ff) is smarter than dd#2(who was bf), so I don't think it really makes a difference, so I'm ff ds". :

Shelley

[siobhang]

a woman in my neighborhood said "even though I had no problems with my second child, I gave up bf after 10 days because I just didn't feel like it."

Mind you, she bf her first for 6 months, despite serious problems during the first few weeks.

I had NO idea what to say in response. I just said nothing, though in another conversation, I made sure she knew I was tandem nursing my kids. I am sure she thinks I am a freak.

Siobhan

[EvansMomma]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

"You really deserve a break. Next time, you should try breastfeeding, it is much easier than formula and will give you more time to just enjoy your baby."

Is that okay? Or does it imply that she doesn't spend enough time with her baby? I was thinking that like going to prepare the bottles and stuff could take up time that could be spent just cuddling, even if the baby's right with her.

That's awesome!
FFing is - I think - far more time consuming and troublesome than breastfeeding was. I spend hours a day cleaning and preparing bottles. Then once a day I get the joy of MAKING the wretched formula. All this, and on top of it I have to listen to my poor lil babe cry for 3-5 mins while his bottle warms. If anyone says to any of you that they FF because it's easier - they are fooling themselves!!