Originally Posted by TexasSuz
Sorry, but I don't see why your friend had such an issue with her c-sections. I had two and would have another if I got pregnant. If she really wanted more kids then she wouldn't have gotten a tubal. I think she is just giving an excuse. No one forced her into a tubal - she is responsible for her own choices just like we all are.
I am grateful that c-sections exists becasue without them I would not have been able to be a mom at all!
This seriously must be the most insensitive statement I've ever seen on MDC.
: This thread has nothing to do with your c-sections, your body, your options, your feelings.
I'm actually very glad that we live in a world where mothers and babies can be saved by c-sections. I'm happy that you are able to be a mom and that c-sections gave you that gift. C-sections can be truely a life giving operation and for that I am grateful.
I am not grateful or happy when I see comments such as this. Every woman is different. Every birth is different. Every woman's feelings are different. No one has the right to undermine another woman's feeling. TexsSuz, you say that you don't like it when a woman is pitied or looked down on for having a c-section. You don't like it when you feel c-section moms are being judged. Please, reread your post I quoted above and tell me if your comment is free of judgement. It is not. It is loaded
with judgement. You dished out exactly what it is you say you don't like.
I can understand why some women choose sterilization than to face another surgery. I can understand why some women are happy and/or grateful with their surgeries. I can understand why some women are angry or sad over even necessary c-sections. I understand all spectrums and all sides of the c-section issue. I don't think that the majority of moms on this board need the other perspective pointed out to us. We know that c-sections can be good. We also know that they can be bad. We know that women need support for their feelings regardless of what those feelings may be.
There was a time after my c-section that I seriously considered not having any more children. Who are you to judge that and say that someone is just looking for an excuse to not have more children? Who are you to downplay the trauma that someone may go through just because that wasn't your experience?
If I had known 100% that I would have had another c-section with my second child I would not have gotten pg ever again. If I knew that I would 100% have another c-section with any future children I would never get pg again. Not because I want an excuse to not have more children, but because my c-section was one of the worst things that ever happened to me. No one is allowed to take those feelings away from me. No one is allowed to disregard my feelings. No one is allowed to compare my experience with their own and judge.
I'll say it again that I really am happy that your c-sections were a life giving gift to you and your children. Just remember that there are women who do not feel the same and they are intitled to have those feelings.
Yes, I also like it when people tell me they are sorry I had a c-section. It doesn't make me feel like I failed. It makes me feel supported.