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personal hygiene and my 10 yr old ds

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 
HELP!

I need suggestions on how to help my ds care about his personal hygiene. He could care less what his clothes look like, how his hair looks, whether his teeth are brushed, etc. But what is worse is that he does an absolute horrible job of wiping after using the bathroom and he stinks! We have wet wipes in all the bathrooms. We are constantly asking him, as gently as possible, to go back in and clean himself. Dh even found him coming out of the shower one night with pooh on his bottom. Today I went into his bedroom and the smell was so bad I gagged. I don't want to humiliate or shame him, I am at my wit's end of what to do. How do you encourage a child to care about such things?

TIA!
post #2 of 8
When my dd was older and I thouht it was time that she be more in charge of her hygiene, I ended up going into the bathroom with her and 'teaching' her how to clean, wash, wipe and how to know when her undies were no longer wearable. Maybe dad could teach ds the way 'big boys take care of their bodies'?
Hope this helps!

Sometimes they just haven't learned the proper way to care for themselves, kwim? No fault of our own. Sometimes us parents know how to do something and just assume our children also know, when they, in fact, may not. Just like the math teacher who has a Ph.D who gets frustrated at the 2nd grader for having trouble adding, kwim?
post #3 of 8
My 12 yr old son's room stinks too. DH said it is probably from his feet. I remember the last couple of years he would smell SO awful his 12 yr old step sister would say "You stink! Go clean up!" LOL!
Maybe find a good book dh can share with hhim on hygene? Take heart - now we can't keep these kids out of the shower !
post #4 of 8

no answers here

Our 14 year old ds has MCS, and is bedridden, so his first reason for not bathing was that he was allergic to the chlorine in the water. We spent $$ on a whole house water filtration system, and he STILL doesn't brush his teeth or bathe. I regularly air out his room and change his sheets, and that seems to get the reakyness down to a minimum. I guess he just has a grunge look, and eventually when enough of his friends or people he has a conversation with gag, maybe he will get the point. Part of it could be depression that would make him not care for himself. I do have compassion on him, as he says he is too sick to bathe or brush, sometimes my dh has had to bathe him, but that is too embarrasing, so he just goes dirty. I wonder what parents of disabled kids do in this situation? Occasionally we do the "as soon as you bathe or brush your teeth", whenever he asks for something, and that gets a shower in and teeth brushing about once a week. This just doesn't feel right though because he may as for something I would normally say no to or maybe I can't afford, and I will just say "take a shower and I'll get it for you". We also sometimes buy him whatever food he wants, just to get him to eat. I am trying to move our relationship to a different level though, because this is very unhealthy IMO
post #5 of 8
my 9yo ds is this way with bathing,brushing teeth and putting deodorant on. He drives me crazy, nothing worse than smellin a stinky pitted 9yo: He says he doesn't stink, but I tell ya, get to close and watch out. I keep trying to tell him, it smells, people don't want to smell other people's body odor and he should want to smell good. He is very lazy about it, however, he has to have his hair a certain way and will only wear certain types of clothes.:
post #6 of 8
I think this is a very typical boy thing. We were just talking about this at work. Apparently they outgrow it when they begin to notice that the female sex exists and won't come near a smelly, dirty Neanderthal.
post #7 of 8
Quote:
Originally posted by Mom2six
Apparently they outgrow it when they begin to notice that the female sex exists and won't come near a smelly, dirty Neanderthal.
:LOL

OMG I have to wait that long
post #8 of 8
Ummm. My father is a very neat person and I think probably was when small, too. I don't think it is a "boy" thing.

There was a time in the day when we all would bathe (before bed) and hands had to be washed before each meal and face had to be washed each morning and...etc. Didn't sit down to eat until hands were cleaned. Dirty nails were a no-no. Same at his sister's house and they had three boys. All clean. (And happy, not a house of a martinet.)

Unfortunately, I think it is a "lay down the law" issue with some people. A routine has to be had and stuck to.
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