How do you find a doctor you have confidence in?

[airmide_m]

Between my experiences here:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...14#post5177614

And this thread:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...48#post5157848

It's got me thinking even more.....how do you pick a doctor you can have confidence in?

What I've learned so far - make sure they are respectful, listen to your research, explain things fully and don't talk down to you or dismiss your concerns. Do your research so you can tell if something seems off. And one I've just now learned - ask ahead of time what their standard procedure is for contacting patients over the phone. Make sure if you need to reach them you can without having to run a gauntlet of biased office staff and nurses whose primary goal is to keep you way from the doctor.

But what else is there? I thought I had it figured out, but obviously I don't. Patient testimonials mean very little because we all know how few people are actually informed participants in their healthcare. And even if they are....they might not know yet...up till last week I would have said my doctor was fantastic and now I feel the opposite.

I'd say make sure they're willing to be tenacious to find out the answers. But at the same time, you don't want them running tons of unnecessary tests.

I'd like someone who agrees with my philosophies...but maybe that's not so important as simply someone who is good at what they do and will respect my wishes whether they agree or not?

So what sort of research do you do, and what sort of questions do you ask in order to determine (before it's too late) how thorough, educated and trustworthy your doctor is?

[Kirsten]

What part of the PNW are you in? I adore my health care professionals!!!! They truly are all fabulous.

[airmide_m]

Lol guess I might as well just change that to pinpoint where I am. I tend to be a little cautious of revealing location online, but if I'm going to participate in the area "find your tribe" everyone will know anyway!

I'm in the Portland OR area, westside but willing to drive a bit for someone good. At this point we're looking for primary care physicians, OBGYN's and RE's.

But more than anything I'm interested in how people get to where they KNOW their doctor is good. What sorts of questions to ask etc. Referrals can be great but I always like to know how to find out for myself, not *just* take someone else's word for it.

[Kirsten]

Well, all my recommendations would be a three hour drive (one way) for you so not too helpful! Although for something that was only once or twice a year, maybe worth it to make a fun trip out of it?

Trying to remember how I found all the people I really love. Pediatrician was in the same office - but different doc - than one a lot of preschool classmates use. I was interviewing for someone new as our previous one just wasn't cutting it for me for a number of reasons. Interviewed the classmates' guy and found him terribly condescending. But then met with another doc in the same practice and we just LOVE him, and the female doc that backups for him.

Midwives were ones some good friends from Bradley childbirth class all used with their previous pregnancies.

Childbirth teacher I just got lucky - calling around to all the local Bradley instructors. I just clicked with one. I don't think it is any specific question I asked; just a similar philosophy and personality.

Our great GP (dh and I both use) was recommended to us by our then pediatrician; they went to med school together. We ADORE this man!

My women's health care specialist is someone I just ended up with at Group Health over a decade ago when she worked there and we had that insurance. I chose to go to a "women's health care specialist" instead of an OB/GYN for annual checkups before I had kids. She is fantastic. I followed her when she left GH for her own practice.

So I think that I have had a combination of good recommendations and just finding people that fit my ideas of healthcare. If you are open about what you want, and know enough people with connections in those areas - I think you can (hopefully....) find people that work for you. Don't continue with someone that doesn't FEEL right to you. That one pediatrician that we met with - the one used by lots of people we know - didn't give me a good feeling when I met him the first time. That was the last time I saw him. I didn't give him a second chance to change my mind; we just weren't a good fit and I knew it.

I try to be open and honest about what I'm looking for, while still being respectful of the fact that it may be different than what the AMA or AAP says. Doesn't mean I'll do something I'm not comfortable with - just that I understand there are other viewpoints and I'll be respectful of that just as I expect them to be respectful of my responsibility to look at all the info and make the best decision I can for me or my child.

I do think that if you have a dealbreaker issue, I'd be open with that right up front to find someone who is on the same page as you are. One of the reasons we left that one ped is that he started getting weird about delayed vax. The current ped is totally fine with it and doesn't give me any trouble. It is very respectful and I am thrilled.

Hope you can find people who work well for you.

[airmide_m]

Hehe I guess a better title for my question/thread would have been "What questions do you ask when interviewing doctors?"

I do have plenty of people willing to give recomendations and I know that can be a great resource. My concern is that my previous doctor I DID get that "click" with and thought he was fantastic for 4 years, and only in hindsight after one REALLY BIG ball-drop do I realize all the other places where he was not as invested in my healthcare as I'd have liked, or too quick to be "reassuring"...which now I feel was being dismissive in an extremely convincingly nice way.

So how do you make sure? What kind of questions would you ask up-front to try to weed out those who do seem to click and be what you want at first, but might not be as good as they seem?

And do most doctors do "interviews"? How does that work? I've only just gone in for a first checkup and had that be the interview, but I'd much prefer a sit-down. I'm not sure if insurance companies have problems with shopping around for a doctor, but I wouldn't mind paying the $10 copay for the "office visit" a few times till we find someone we can work with, though obviously I'd rather save money if possible but I realize their time is valuable too.

[mclisa]

I think word of mouth is a great way to start out. Then do your interviews.