spacing pregnancies/babies: your thoughts? - Page 2

[GearGirl]

Mine are 2 yrs 9 mths apart and I have really liked it. Close enough to play, far enough to have their own special friends/things/etc. If we had a third it would a 4 year or more difference.

[momtokay]

Originally Posted by Mom2JandG

Mine are 2 yrs 9 mths apart and I have really liked it. Close enough to play, far enough to have their own special friends/things/etc. If we had a third it would a 4 year or more difference.

i'll just ditto that. though mine are 2y8mos apart as dd2 came almost a month early. since dd2 is now 3yo if we were to have a third that one would be at least 4 years after the second as well.

[eilonwy]

I think that it really depends on the children. Personality wise, my spacings (19 and 21 months, respectively) are perfect for us. I'm still upset about the milk issue, though; while I was pregnant with BooBah, I lost my milk for BeanBean and he got sick. He wasn't physically ready to be eating as many calories as he needed in solid food, and it was hard on all of us. It wasn't an issue for BooBah who self-weaned at 15 months due to a developing lactose intolerance, but for BeanBean the pregnancy was very difficult. Given the choice to do it all over again, I'd have planned to concieve BooBah after BeanBean was down to 1-3 nursing sessions a day.

I loved tandem nursing, but nursing during pregnancy was *awful* for us.

[lexbeach]

My twins will be 3 years, 9 months old when this baby comes (this one was actually conceived 2 days after their 3rd birthday). It is a further spacing than I thought I wanted, but now I'm really glad for it. Our situation is somewhat different since the first two kids are twins. I think it can be really hard for a child to be an only child for close to 4 years, and then suddenly have a baby sibling. I'm hoping that since my kids are already used to sharing our attention, there won't be quite as much jealousy as there would be were this to be their first sibling experience.

I initially thought I'd like to have my kids two years apart. That absolutely wasn't going to happen since with nursing twins, I didn't get ppaf until they were 21 months old. Then I thought an ideal spacing would be 3 years apart, but at the point when I would have had to start trying (when the boys were 27 months), they were both still nursing very frequently, sleeping in our bed, not sleeping through the night, and generally going through a hard time with their relationship to each other. Dw and I decided that we would start trying as soon as they were mostly weaned (down to 2-3 nursings a day), out of diapers, and sleeping in their own beds most of the time. All of these milestones were met by the time they were 2.5, and we started trying a couple months later. It took five months to get pregnant, so that's how we came to our spacing. Since I got pregnant, the boys weaned completely (nursing is really painful for me during pregnancy, and didn't feel right at all), and I'm glad I wasn't pregnant earlier for that reason alone. I'm glad they got 3 years of unhindered nursing (not that there wasn't some mama-led weaning in there, there definitely was). They also *stopped* sleeping through the night, and are now back in our bed most of the time, but since they're not nursing anymore, I appreciate the extra snuggle time and don't mind at all (although I do wonder how it will work when the baby comes).

I hope that my boys won't be too much older than this baby to form a close relationship with him/her. Ideally, I'd like to adopt a 4th baby when baby #3 is 2, but I don't know if I'll be able to get dw on board with that plan (she's thinking 3 is enough). I do feel sort of bad for this baby to not have a built-in playmate the way my twins do.

Lex

[MyCalling]

My oldest two are 15 months apart and that was perfect. They are best friends, tandum nursed, and even sleep in the same bed together. So after the second I decided no closer than a year apart...not a problem, I exclusively breastfeed...then we went and conceived twins!

Although my 3rd was born 2y4m after his brother, my 4th of course came along only 9 minutes later. Now having experienced 0 months spacing...it's all fine with me. Personally I love the bond my older two have and my twins have. I wish the twins came closer to their brother though...2y4m just seems so far apart.

Now the twins are 14mo and I'd love to be fertile to be able to get pregnant...hense I've wondered into the fertility section.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

For me the spacing was very important. I wanted to make sure that nothing interfered with our nursing relationship and have it so she could wean when she was ready. Also I did not want 2 in diapers. I also wanted to make sure that dd got as much 1 on 1 time as possible with me. So I planned for at least 4yrs between them. I would have been ok with 5yrs as well. Now that dd is in school it gives me and ds the same 1 on 1 time I had with dd. She is old enough that she understands better and she absolutly adores her brother. If I had planned to have more there would be at least 4yrs between them as well. For us it is the only way to go.

[Justmee]

Well my first two are 10 minutes apart, but they are : I got my first post partum period at 6 months and didn't think much of it (it took a year for us to concieve the girls), but I got pregnant the next month. While I wouldn't have planned to have 3 kids under 18 months :, it worked out pretty well. The girls all play together now, they are into the same toys. I don't have to worry about picking up parts to games the baby could eat / choke on. They go to bed at the same time and sometimes nap at the same time so I can go on MDC . I am taking a little break now, mainy to get back into shape (and because dh needs some space). I gained 60 pounds with the girls : and only lost about 25 before getting pregnant with Rivka. I need to get back into a decent shape before I can handle the stress of another pregnancy. I think we will TTC in a year or so, and then hopefully have 2 or 3 more close in age.

[Adamsmama]

I'm trying to figure this out, too. I like the 22 month spacing of our first two--although, they seem to fight a lot now (jealousy over toys) the good thing is they play with the same stuff and wear the same size diapers. I think I would like a 2-3 year spacing more just to give more time with the baby before the sibling comes a long. We may be trying for a 2yr4 month spacing this time...