In trouble at work for nursing

[phathui5]

I experienced "motherhood discrimination" at work today. I was given the lowest possible score in the "professional appearance" category of my performance review for nursing my eight month old. My kids are able to go to work with me; it has always been that way. We recently got a new director who is resentful of the employees bringing their children to work with them. She came right out and told me that I was losing points on the evaluation for bringing my kids and for breastfeeding. I work in a freaking babysitting drop off! It's not even a real daycare. Dh says to just quit, but I think I'm going to talk to the HR department tomorrow.

[frenchie]

Definately take it up with HR!!

[ABand3]

phathui5 - I've seen you mention on other threads where you work, and I applied for a job there, about 5-6 years ago. I'm sure it's not the same people, but I had a terrible experience. I had been using the drop off babysitting, and complained to the director one day (in private) because the infants in the infant area (3-4, including mine) were left on the floor or in swings SCREAMING while the worker had her back turned doing paperwork. Shortly after that I applied (they reaalllly needed people), my references checked out (I was a nanny and I know they talked with my former employer) yet I did not get the job, after being told it was all but finalized. My gut tells me my application got derailed when it reached the person to whom I had complained about the quality of care. I wish I had pursed it, but I just let it go.

I've had several other problems with that organization as a client - child safety related things. I think they need a shake up somewhere to get them back on track.

I hope you do talk to HR, and maybe take it even farther... I'm sure they must have broken a law(s)- don't you think? Maybe LLL would help. Fight the good fight!!!

[Momtwice]

If they are violating safety rules, isn't there some kind of inspector you can call?

[JamesMama]

I'd def talk to HR that is NOT right they shouldn't treat you like that. If it is policy to allow children in the work place you shouldn't get in trouble for it just because one of the supervisors doesn't like kids. Thats her issue not yours.

Good luck!

[angelpie545]

Talk to HR about it. We have all got to work together to end discrimination against mothers in the workplace. That is so incredibly wrong and frustrating. I saw something on CBS news I think it was about the growing trend of discriminating against pregnant and nursing women. It's very sad, but if every women stood up against it, they'd have a lot harder time getting away with it.

[Maggies*Mommy]

Quitting wont fix the problem...but, reporting to HR may. Plus if you use the word "discrimination" it goes a long way.

Good luck to you!

[gentlebirthmothr]

Originally Posted by angelpie545

Talk to HR about it. We have all got to work together to end discrimination against mothers in the workplace. That is so incredibly wrong and frustrating. I saw something on CBS news I think it was about the growing trend of discriminating against pregnant and nursing women. It's very sad, but if every women stood up against it, they'd have a lot harder time getting away with it.

phathui5,

: to what aband3 and Bethany said to about this.

[Joannarachel]

:

Pursue this. That girl needs to have her head dipped in a bucket of warm breastmilk.

[phathui5]

Originally Posted by Joannarachel

:

Pursue this. That girl needs to have her head dipped in a bucket of warm breastmilk.

Oh, that made a funny mental picture. The sad thing is that she's probably in her thirties and has two kids (the lady who is the problem).

[kalisis]

Definitely pursue it. It's important because she'll just keep doing it to more women and the more she gets away with it, the more entrenched that policy will become. Ugh...I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

[geek_the_girl]

Originally Posted by JamesMama

I'd def talk to HR that is NOT right they shouldn't treat you like that. If it is policy to allow children in the work place you shouldn't get in trouble for it just because one of the supervisors doesn't like kids. Thats her issue not yours.

Good luck!

Yeah THAT!
Good luck mama

[sapphire_chan]

Isn't this the same work place who thought you were out of place for complaining about a co-worker screaming at her kids? And now all of a sudden they care about "professional appearances"?

Man, forget baby fever, I'm starting to want babies just so I can help at nurse-ins.

[p1gg1e]

I went through this with a lady I filled in for on mat. leave. She came back and had to pump in the basment nasty bathroom. She had an office with a door no windows.... Sigh she was crying and was going to walk out. I told her dont you quite you march in there make a stink about it nicly call you marketing reganal and tell her ( also a pumping mom) and if they fire you for speaking up it makes them look worse . Stick to you guns girl its works. That mama has a place in her office for her pump ( though she doesnt need it anymore her dd is almost three and nurses once a day ) but you will help others. I pumped in my co-workers office ( I found out I got pregnant the day her DD was born ) and other emplyees my have to someday also.

[ollineeba]

I agree with all of the other posters- whatever you do, don't let this go! Pursue it and talk to the HR dept. That isn't right.

Let us know what happens!!

[guerrillamama]

Document everything.

[Meiri]

If that person doesn't like children, what is she doing working at a babysitting service?

[wawap]

Here's the thing, IMO, if it's NOT against the rules to bring & care for your own kids, how can she mark you off for that? I mean, I can see if you're NOT supposed to bring your kids & you do - that is worth a hit (.

I would definitely bring it up to HR.

Either way, I'm very sorry.

[Ellien C]

I think you should report it to HR, but I also want to give you my perspective.

On my review this year, I gave myself an average rating for "punctuality" (or something like that) and an average rating on professional appearance. In my pre-kid days, I was always dressed to the nines and I arrived early and stayed late. There are many working fathers and some women without children who arrive before me and are still there when I leave. I figure this is the sacrifice I make now that I have young children. It would have been unthinkable for me to go to work without make-up in the before time and now, some days I'm even showered! I'm here when I need to be here and I'm never late to morning meetings, but I'm also not "who" I used to be either. I accept that my standards for getting to work and appearance are lower now that I have kids than they were before. I also figure that eventually, I'll get back to my old early self with nice clothes, but it's not going to happen at this point in my life - and that's OK. This is my way of saying, I don't have to do it all - some things can slide.

I'm not saying it's right, but taking the hit in "professional appearance" may be the "sacrifice" you make right now in order to bring your kids to work.

That might be a way to broach it with HR. Maybe you could say something like you're willing to take the hit in professionalism - but you feel you deserve an average rating, not the lowest rating. You understand the limitations, and don't expect outstanding, but you are following the groundrules and not doing less.

[indie]

Originally Posted by Ellien C

I think you should report it to HR, but I also want to give you my perspective.

On my review this year, I gave myself an average rating for "punctuality" (or something like that) and an average rating on professional appearance. In my pre-kid days, I was always dressed to the nines and I arrived early and stayed late. There are many working fathers and some women without children who arrive before me and are still there when I leave. I figure this is the sacrifice I make now that I have young children. It would have been unthinkable for me to go to work without make-up in the before time and now, some days I'm even showered! I'm here when I need to be here and I'm never late to morning meetings, but I'm also not "who" I used to be either. I accept that my standards for getting to work and appearance are lower now that I have kids than they were before. I also figure that eventually, I'll get back to my old early self with nice clothes, but it's not going to happen at this point in my life - and that's OK. This is my way of saying, I don't have to do it all - some things can slide.

I'm not saying it's right, but taking the hit in "professional appearance" may be the "sacrifice" you make right now in order to bring your kids to work.

That might be a way to broach it with HR. Maybe you could say something like you're willing to take the hit in professionalism - but you feel you deserve an average rating, not the lowest rating. You understand the limitations, and don't expect outstanding, but you are following the groundrules and not doing less.

The thing is, if her workplace feels that it is unprofessional to bring kids to work then they shouldn't allow it. Its not right to allow it and then mark down for it. And feeding your children is a given so she shouldn't be marked down for that either.