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Leaving kids in car unattended for just a minute...how bad is it? - Page 6

post #101 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by 4imprints
However, not taking your kids out of the car is just plain old laziness. There - I said it - not to offend anyone - that is just my perspective on it. Remember this is coming from me.
When I was a girl, my mom used to give us a choice to stay in the car or go into the store with her. We virtually always stayed in the car and listened to the radio. My mom wasn't lazy. She knew what we could and could not handle and was respectful of our choices.
post #102 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by kmisje
In Arizona, it gets 120 degrees, YES in ONE minute a child could get over heated here, want to know how many children died in Arizona because parents were too lazy to take their kids out of the car here to go pay for gass???

And I am talking small infant babies, in a none running car. With NO a/c on.
It may not happen in some places, but why take a chance???
Well, that's in Arizona, I can tell you that if I were living there, I wouldn't leave Emily in the car, but in Wisconsin in the fall, it doesn't get that hot. The car might get to the 70's inside, and there's really no risk there from getting overheated. You have to understand that everyone's situation is different, and take it into account when saying overheating can happen in a minute because yes, it can happen, but I don't see that happening in WI in the fall.
post #103 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragonfly
The thing about that is that suddenly, one day, they can undo their latches. Ds was very proud of himself when that happened.

I've never left ds in the car in my driveway because I can't see the driveway from my house. And I've always been concerned that I'd do something silly like trip over my feet while running in, bash my head on the sidewalk, and be out cold for the next hour. Yeah, yeah, I know. I can be a bit of a klutz, though, so it's not entirely out of the realm of possibility

When he was a toddler and I had to carry groceries or other packages in, I'd have the wrap or mei tai handy and tie him on my back. It was a lot of weight to deal with, but it's only a few minutes... and good exercise.

I do leave him now, occasionally, to drop a movie in the slot (though most times he wants to do it) or to drop books in the outdoor library box. But that means being maybe 5 feet from the door and I lock the car with the remote locks when I get out.

It just seems like too big of a risk to me. Even though there's risk in getting him out and walking with him through a parking lot, it feels lesser because I'm holding his hand and could potentially help him if he needed it whereas, if he's in the car and someone goes after him, there's really little to no chance of me helping him from a distance.
I guess it's a good thing we have a car that doesn't have a cigarette lighter I heard about the story of the woman on Oprah who left 3 of her kids in the car and they lit it on fire with the cigarette lighter. Yes, it's sad, but she should have taught them LONG ago (one of the kids was 8) that they shouldn't be playing with it.
post #104 of 164
I took the cigarette lighter out as soon as ds figured out what it was. He loves gadgets AND fire. I was happy when he got old enough to get out of his carseat by himself because I always worried that something would happen to me if I ran back inside for something that I forgot and he would be stuck in the car indefinitly.

At his current age (almost 5), I would only leave him in the car if I was parked where he wouldn't have to cross the parking lot at all to get to me and I had good visibility. I would never leave the keys in the car with him. He would be able to start the car if he wanted. I let him stay in the car with the motor running only when I get out to open the garage door. I have a strict rule that he may not climb into the front seat when the motor is on and I am not in the driver's seat. He likes to climb up and work the wipers, turn signals, lights, etc, while I pull into the garage. He is a strange mix of cautious and over-confident so I never know what to expect.
post #105 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by firstkid4me
I heard about the story of the woman on Oprah who left 3 of her kids in the car and they lit it on fire with the cigarette lighter. Yes, it's sad, but she should have taught them LONG ago (one of the kids was 8) that they shouldn't be playing with it.
You can teach kids things, but they don't always do as you teach them. Kids--especially groups of kids--do stupid things sometimes. That is why I feel that it is unsafe for children to be unsupervised in a car. Way too many big hazards for people of immature judgment.
post #106 of 164
Yep, you can also teach kids they MUST hold your hand in a parking lot--that doesn't mean they won't break loose. Again, which is more dangerous? loose toddler in a parking lot or loose toddler in a car where mom can see and react within 30 seconds???
Having put 6 too many toddlers in body bags, I can say that not one of them had been left in a car where parents could see.
post #107 of 164
Quote:
In Arizona, it gets 120 degrees, YES in ONE minute a child could get over heated here, want to know how many children died in Arizona because parents were too lazy to take their kids out of the car here to go pay for gass???
If it were 120 degree's I wouldn't be leaving my house.
post #108 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama
You can teach kids things, but they don't always do as you teach them. Kids--especially groups of kids--do stupid things sometimes. That is why I feel that it is unsafe for children to be unsupervised in a car. Way too many big hazards for people of immature judgment.
What about an 11 month old who is strapped into his carseat? He physically doesn't have the force to press the button to unbuckle himself out of his seat. There's nothing within his reach (no lighters, no flamethrowers, no matches). I think everyone imagines this situation differently--the number of kids, the safety of the neighborhood, the relative risks of walking outside vs. staying in the car.

And I do agree with you that you can learn something and still mess up and do something stupid later...how many teens have been educated to not drink and drive and then done it themselves? too many
post #109 of 164
Why is it so hard to accept that different people weigh their risks vs. benefits differently? There are many factors here....temperature, location, age of kid(s), etc..... Each person is going to look at their cards and decide what tips the scale for them. Coming on here to say "I do x,y,or z" is fine. Calling one camp "lazy" and the other "paranoid" is actually against the user agreement (isn't it?). I have run across VERY few parents on MDC that I would say have really "wacked" views on what we all agree to be good parenting. It cracks me up that we fight over these tiny details.

So who is "better"? The parents that makes their kid misrable on a frequent basis by keeping them "safe"? Can we say bubble? Or the parents that neglect their kids in order to achieve that laziness they want so much? No one here is anywhere close to either camp.

For me the situation was different with age and where we are. My climate is never very hot and even on mildly warm days, I would never leave any human in my car without it running and with the AC on. Same with really cold days and heat. That means my car is running and not locked. So that automatically limits me to my driveway, friend's driveways/yards, right next to me on the sidewalk, camping spots, library/video slot (never more than 5 feet away), all within viewing distance and line of sight. I could do more earlier when I was confident dd could not open her belts and when we owned a car that could be locked when running. I have had many pedestrian close-calls so I do not see this as a black and white issue. I also tend not to dwell on the 24 hour news channels which I do htink makes a differnce.
post #110 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by la mamita
What about an 11 month old who is strapped into his carseat? He physically doesn't have the force to press the button to unbuckle himself out of his seat. There's nothing within his reach (no lighters, no flamethrowers, no matches). I think everyone imagines this situation differently--the number of kids, the safety of the neighborhood, the relative risks of walking outside vs. staying in the car.

And I do agree with you that you can learn something and still mess up and do something stupid later...how many teens have been educated to not drink and drive and then done it themselves? too many
You would leave your 11 mos old with no lighter, matches or flamethrower????? How irresponsible...have you NEVER watched McGyver??? I mean those things could save a life!!!!
I can't believe I'm reading this here!!!
post #111 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by flyingspaghettimama
Well, we're not all intellectually gifted.
Starting with me! If I can remember not to scratch my watch and wind my ass, I count myself ahead for the day.


Quote:
I do think it's all about chances. The chances of something bad happening to your kid are like 1/10,000. But if your kid IS that one, then it's pretty crappy. I mean, I doubt any of the parents involved were like, "Yeah, I'll go in and pick up my oldest at Kindergarten for a quick minute and the other kids might light themselves on fire, but hey, I'll be back out in time, prolly." They probably did it 50 other times and nothing bad happened, so why would it happen this one other random time?
Yeah, that's pretty much my stance on it. Why take the even 1 in 10,000 chance? Hey, SOMEone has to be last in line...and there's no magic halo over my head preventing that person from being me.
post #112 of 164
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post #113 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by laohaire




Yet it is clear that you have to make choices, and choosing the safest choice every time would probably require that you live like a nutcase.
).
With all due respect, I strongly disagree. Conceding part of your point, no one can always make the safest choice every time. Sometimes we lack knowledge of which choice would be the safest. Sometimes our personal experiences cloud our judgment and feed us false or misleading data, making our assumptions (and therefore the judgments based on them) wrong.

However, I do believe we can make the safER choices MOST of the time. It mostly comes down to a 50/50 either/or proposition:

Locked or unlocked?
Hitchhike or taxi?
Man or woman?
Pay at pump/pay inside?
Take kid/leave kid?
Phone/no phone?
Insurance/No insurance?
Gun safety course/situational reaction?
House alarm/no house alarm?

Sometimes there are situations with conflicting information:

Vax/no-vax?

And then you make the choice for your family based on the best information you can glean.

None of these things, though, need make one a "nutcase."
post #114 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amylcd
If it were 120 degree's I wouldn't be leaving my house.

Wouldn't that be great if we who live in really hot states could all make that decision? Every day? From basically the end of July through the end of September? I'd love to have a catering service who would bring me all my groceries and a gym attached to my house so I wouldn't actually have to go into the four-wheeled oven. I'm sure that's about as practical as saying that I'd never leave the house if it were below zero. Sometimes, you have very little choice.
post #115 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by shannon0218
You would leave your 11 mos old with no lighter, matches or flamethrower????? How irresponsible...have you NEVER watched McGyver??? I mean those things could save a life!!!!
I can't believe I'm reading this here!!!
I figure his grenade is enough of a toy for one kid...
post #116 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by shannon0218
You would leave your 11 mos old with no lighter, matches or flamethrower????? How irresponsible...have you NEVER watched McGyver??? I mean those things could save a life!!!!
I can't believe I'm reading this here!!!
Maybe she doesn't have the lighter, matches and flamethrower within reach, but she'll leave a q-tip, paper clip, and pumice stone within reach. He'll figure it out
post #117 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by Charles Baudelaire
Wouldn't that be great if we who live in really hot states could all make that decision? Every day? From basically the end of July through the end of September? I'd love to have a catering service who would bring me all my groceries and a gym attached to my house so I wouldn't actually have to go into the four-wheeled oven. I'm sure that's about as practical as saying that I'd never leave the house if it were below zero. Sometimes, you have very little choice.
Peapod.com delivers groceries, there's one thing off your list
post #118 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by firstkid4me
Peapod.com delivers groceries, there's one thing off your list
Doesn't deliver in my hot state.
post #119 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yooper
Why is it so hard to accept that different people weigh their risks vs. benefits differently? There are many factors here....temperature, location, age of kid(s), etc..... Each person is going to look at their cards and decide what tips the scale for them. Coming on here to say "I do x,y,or z" is fine. Calling one camp "lazy" and the other "paranoid" is actually against the user agreement (isn't it?).
post #120 of 164
Quote:
Originally Posted by kmisje
Doesn't deliver in my hot state.
They might be coming, I was shocked when I found out they deliver in Burlington, there's only a population of 10,000.
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