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What's the most shocking thing you've ever seen another parent do? - Page 5

post #81 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Margaret
I'm guessing she meant just chocolate milk all the time is worse than a few sips of pop on few occassions... that's how I read it at least.
Ah, now that makes sense.
post #82 of 151
the most shocking....hmm.....I know a mom who wanted her 11 year old daughter to stay the night alone with her grandmother who was dying. The grandmother was at home, terminally ill and the doctor had said she probably wouldn't last the night. The mother and her brother didn't want to spend the night there so the mother suggested that her 11 year old could stay with grandma. The 11 year old was TERRIFIED! She didn't want to spend the night alone with dying grandma, her mother shamed her for being afraid. Luckily grandma died a few hours later. The mother.....she's mine. Yes, I was the 11 year old. I have many shocking stories from my own childhood
post #83 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by warrior mama
the most shocking....hmm.....I know a mom who wanted her 11 year old daughter to stay the night alone with her grandmother who was dying. The grandmother was at home, terminally ill and the doctor had said she probably wouldn't last the night. The mother and her brother didn't want to spend the night there so the mother suggested that her 11 year old could stay with grandma. The 11 year old was TERRIFIED! She didn't want to spend the night alone with dying grandma, her mother shamed her for being afraid. Luckily grandma died a few hours later. The mother.....she's mine. Yes, I was the 11 year old. I have many shocking stories from my own childhood
Oh my!
post #84 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleBee
Once at Target (about 8 years ago), I saw a mom in line...he young baby was just crying and crying (assuming hunger or tired)...she was visible irritated by the crying child. She then strapped the baby in the carseat, got into the front seat---turned around a PUNCHED the baby in the face (I was sitting directly in front of her in my car). Thankfully I had a cellphone...I called the police, pulled out after her (and she knew I was after her because I screamed out when I saw what she had done), I got her license plate #, stayed on the phone with 911...following her EVERYWHERE...until the cops FINALLY caught up to her...they arrested her!!!!!!!!!! **SIGH**
OMG! Good for you for doing that! Wow...
post #85 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by warrior mama
the most shocking....hmm.....I know a mom who wanted her 11 year old daughter to stay the night alone with her grandmother who was dying. The grandmother was at home, terminally ill and the doctor had said she probably wouldn't last the night. The mother and her brother didn't want to spend the night there so the mother suggested that her 11 year old could stay with grandma. The 11 year old was TERRIFIED! She didn't want to spend the night alone with dying grandma, her mother shamed her for being afraid. Luckily grandma died a few hours later. The mother.....she's mine. Yes, I was the 11 year old. I have many shocking stories from my own childhood
This reminds me of a friend of mine. Her mom and stepdad asked her, when she was 17, to be a surrogate for them so they could have a new baby. She didn't tell anybody until she was 31, because she didn't think anyone would believe her. I'm the only one she ever told. I know her mom and stepdad, and I'm not even surprised...
post #86 of 151
I witnessed something 6 years ago, before I ever had kids, that still haunts me.

My DH and I were at Sea World in Orlando, and they had a huge ray tank. It was about waist high, and you could reach in a touch the rays. My husband had gone to the restroom so I was just sitting there by the ray tank and I saw a dad pick up his ~3 yo son and tease him, "I'm going throw you in the tank!" The boy was SCREAMING, "NO! NO! NO! Please, Daddy, NO!" Sobbing, screaming, the whole shebang. The dad kept persisting. I'm going to dunk you! Here we go!" And was holding the little boy over the water and was lowering him close to it, as if he was going to put him in feet first. The boy just kept screaming and sobbing...

Fortunately, my husband returned then, and I told him I wanted to leave the park. Just witnessing that make me sick to my stomach, and I wanted to go.

I know some question the purpose of this thread, but for me, it was very healing writing this out right now, amongst women who understand my horror at witnessing the situation. Thank you. That scene has haunted me for six years.
post #87 of 151
I agree with Sarah, it's why I feel so comfortable here at MDC. If I opened my mouth on a mainstream board about how upsetting it is to me taht my friend keeps her almost 11 month odl in a car seat almost all day it would be debated but here you agree with me, you are all educated enough to understand where I come from in my view of a situation like that. Like yesterday at teh store, I witnessed a man smack his three year old on the back of teh head cuz the (obviously tired) child accidentally stepped on teh back of his shoe. The child started crying and the dad ignored it. Plenty of other people saw and no one even blinked. But I had JUST read this thread before leaving the house and it REALLY made me upset. Normally I keep my moputh shut cuz I don't knwo where to begin but this time I lookd right at the guy and said "Great communication skills your'e teaching him." and walked off. I didn't give a crap if I pist him off. It bothered me.
post #88 of 151
The concept of this thread bothers me.
post #89 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by Galatea
The concept of this thread bothers me.
what about it bothers you? the content or severity of whats been seen or that its being discussed at all?
post #90 of 151

the two most shocking things ~

1. before i was a mom, i saw a mother in the store backhand her baby (sitting in the grocery cart) and start yelling at him. even without being a mom myself yet, i felt so sad i could cry.


2. sitting in my then-OB's office, i saw a mother hand a package of Cert's (?) candy to her 8 month old baby.... and let her baby start eating them.
post #91 of 151
Well, the stories make me sad, but I am uncomfortable with judging other parents, no matter how awful they are treating their kids. I just think, what was done to them as children that they learned to parent like this? And how sad is it that generations of families live this way? I also get sad when reading about people calling the cops on these people, b/c it just makes me imagine having someone try to take my kids away; not that I do these things, but what if someone tried to take my kids away for not vaxxing them or something? And how sad for the kids to be separated from their parents, even though they are terrible parents, it is still going to scar them. The whole thing is just so sad that I don't like the idea of using these people to practice our tattling or to make us feel better about our own slipups.
post #92 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by Galatea
I also get sad when reading about people calling the cops on these people, b/c it just makes me imagine having someone try to take my kids away; not that I do these things, but what if someone tried to take my kids away for not vaxxing them or something? And how sad for the kids to be separated from their parents, even though they are terrible parents, it is still going to scar them. The whole thing is just so sad that I don't like the idea of using these people to practice our tattling or to make us feel better about our own slipups.
Part of ending the cycle of abuse of children is to report such parents, discuss why it is not okay to hit/hurt children, etc.
If we remain silent, who will ever give a voice to these children?
post #93 of 151
I have never told the police about any parents style of discipline unless It was tottaly obvious they were outright abusing the child and not stopping, like an ex neighbour on the other side of our wall. The neighbour I was talking about has been under suspicion of drug selling and using, and has had numerous domestic problems at her apartment needing the assistance of the cops, so thats why the cops etc have knowledge of her. As for other people saying they contacted the police or told CPS.....thats their perogitive.

I agree with you, Its terrible to know these people have probably grown up this way, and their kids will probably go on to act the same way. My veiw of the reason for this thread was more of a cathartic outlet for the pain we feel when we have seen these things.

I myself have the same fears you do, I worry when I start homeschooling will a nosy neighbour report me and possibly have CPS involved to the point where I may have them taken off me....I worried what might happen to me when I refused my GD test during pregnancy.

I definatly don't read this stuff and feel better about my "slipups", in fact, it makes me feel worse, and make me want to control my temper even more in order to protect my children from ever having that pain in their life.
post #94 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaInTheBoonies
Part of ending the cycle of abuse of children is to report such parents, discuss why it is not okay to hit/hurt children, etc.
If we remain silent, who will ever give a voice to these children?
My sentiments exactly. Too many people turn their heads and try to pretend that what they saw didn't happen. And what is up with feeling pity for the abusive parents? What about the children who are being abused day in and day out? Where's the pity for them?

Furthermore, I'm sick of people using the excuse that an abusive childhood is a valid reason for abusing their children. I grew up in a verbally and physically abusive household and I do not, nor will I ever, abuse my child. Instead, I purposely took the hard road and endured years of counseling to help me come to terms with the abuse and overcome it so that I wouldn't continue the cycle with my own child. I realize that in times past, such help may not have been available but, in this day and age, I see no excuse. JMHO.
post #95 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfowler
Furthermore, I'm sick of people using the excuse that an abusive childhood is a valid reason for abusing their children. I grew up in a verbally and physically abusive household and I do not, nor will I ever, abuse my child. Instead, I purposely took the hard road and endured years of counseling to help me come to terms with the abuse and overcome it so that I wouldn't continue the cycle with my own child. I realize that in times past, such help may not have been available but, in this day and age, I see no excuse. JMHO.
:

My dh was raised in many horrible environments and had awful things done to him (though it could have been worse). He is the most wonderful father and would NEVER do to his children what was done to him.

I've seen some good examples of poor parenting in my day but thankfully nothing so horrible that sticks in my mind.

Jill
post #96 of 151
Well, I'm going to outright admit that the reason I read this thread is morbid curiosity. I'm human. And I also like to get hopping mad from time to time . . . really, for me it's no different than reading a formula-feeding forum periodically on another discussion board. It definitely gives me pause to think of how I would respond to certain situations but the main reason is to shake myself out of my comfort zone. I tend to lead a bit of a charmed, zen-like life for the most part, or maybe I just have really strong blinders on, and I've never witnessed anything like this, so I need a pull back into reality from time to time.
post #97 of 151
I once heard a survivor of severe child abuse (can't remember his name) tell his story on the radio in promotion of his memoir. Something he said has always stuck with me. He wanted to know why no one ever intervened. Why did no one ever stop his dad from hitting him while they were in public? Why didn't any of the neighbors call the authorities when it was obvious the kids were being abused? Why didn't anyone ever help him?

I have also heard a survivor report that it was a shock when someone stepped up and confronted his parents in public, basically because it had never occurred to him that he didn't deserve to be treated that way.

I have never been witness to child abuse and I don't know how I would react if I saw it. When I read stories like these I hug my baby and tell her how much I love her. I grieve for all the sadness this life has to offer so many (adults, children, animals)...sometimes it's hard not to let it get me down.
post #98 of 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by wifeandmom
May I ask why chocolate milk is worse that soda in your opinion?

The sugar content is comparable between the two, but at least the milk has protein and calcium, among other nutrients, whereas the soda has what? None of that.
Having your kid drink more than half a gallon of cheapo chocolate milk everyday is much worse in my eyes than letting your child have an occasional sip of pop. THe thing is, her kid only drinks chocolate milk and only eats cheese. Her grandma (my MIL) has her eating like this and she is the same woman who never once even offered a fruit or vegetable besides a rare potato to dh. He became diabetic. I bet she will, too. Now dh loves veggies and healthy food. And while his niece was here, we got her to drink rice milk, soy milk, juice, water, and eat papya, mango, banana...We basically gave her the only nutrition she's had since she was on formula.

That is why I consider gallons of chocolate milk a week to be worse than a sip of pop.
post #99 of 151
Thread Starter 
[QUOTE=EVC]Man, I am so sorry I opened this thread

QUOTE]

I have to admit that when I started this thread I had NO idea that all these stories of abuse would come pouring out (not blaming anyone, I'm the one who opened the can of worms!). I guess my "most shocking thing" wasn't really that shocking, after all (the 3 mo. old drinking Coke). I am very sorry if anyone was offended, hurt or made distraught by all this.
My intention was just to share some of those weird stories that we all have - some harmless gossiping, I guess.
post #100 of 151
I couldn't get past the stories on the first page.
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