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Are pacifiers Bad? - Page 5

Poll Results: are pacifiers bad?

This is a multiple choice poll
  • 12% (36)
    Yes they are bad. they are for lazy parents.
  • 31% (87)
    Maybe not BAD but I choose not to use them
  • 16% (45)
    take it or leave it. I don't care.
  • 32% (90)
    They are good for some kids
  • 3% (11)
    They are great! I wish I had one! LOL
  • 2% (8)
277 Total Votes  
post #81 of 120
Originally posted by Jude's Mama
I So my DS gets a pacifier and he still uses me as well!!!
that is when you know you aren't abusing it, when they still nurse for comfort
post #82 of 120
Just an update (my post is way back on page 1 before the discussion got 'interesting). . .

after 3 weeks of unhappy baby (1st tooth, 2nd tooth, and unhappy belly) the pacifier is no longer of interest. If it seems like he's not feeling well he will readily accept it, but in general is not craving it. He's also started to vocalize more (mama, dada) so I think having something in his mouth is not as interesting as testing his voice.
post #83 of 120
I was 100%, totally against pacifiers....... until DD.
When I was pregnant and still nightnursing her in the family bed, here's how it went:
She'd fuss, I'd pop a boob in her mouth... she'd nurse herself back to sleep, I'd stay awake for the next hour, feeling like my bladder was going to explode but not wanting to get out of bed and wake her... I'd finally go pee, get back in bed, she was awake again, I'd put the boob back in..... uh-oh, gonna go throw up... wait, wait, wait... not totally asleep yet... crawl out of bed, throw up, oops!, the wrenching woke her up..... nurse back to sleep.... oh God, I have to pee again...
It would go on like this ALL NIGHT LONG. I had a full time job to go to in the morning. I was probably running off of two or three hours sleep, MAX. Add in constant nausea, vomiting, and keeping up with an almost two year old and I was ready for the mental ward. Not even joking.
So I nightweaned her onto the pacifier, then moved her to a futon upstairs where she could sleep with her dad.
The binky fairy came recently and took all the binkies away, and they gave them to babies that needed them. The fairies left a special treat for DD. I will not hesitate to use binkies if and when I nightwean DS, who is now 10 months old. Worked like a charm
post #84 of 120
I have to update, as well. I found that I needed the binky for this baby at times other than tending to other children or getting him in the detested carseat.

When he wanted it.

See, he's been trying to suck his fingers since birth but he sucks and then his arm pulls them away and he gets very upset. He hadn't made the connection yet.

I noticed that my usually very good nurser didn't always want to nurse. Sort of. He DID want to nurse, but he'd pull back a little (nipple still firmly in his mouth) and let the milk dribble out. Suck, suck, suck..pull and dribble. Over and over. He'd fuss, too. Whimper and whine. He wasn't getting what he wanted.

So I tried the pacifier. It worked.

Three or four nights ago I woke up to find him sucking and smacking at his fist. His arm was leaving it at his face for a longer period of time and remembered where to put it when he fussed for it. LOL Today he spat the binky out and started in on the fist. We're *almost* there. Woohoo!

Soon I'll be able to throw away the binkies and then my older children won't be able to plug up the baby whenever mom looks away. *L* They're so helpful!
post #85 of 120
I used a pacifier with my daughter for the first 3 months mainly because I was so timid about nursing in public and it was a way to make her last a little longer in between nursing, so that maybe I could make it home first and not be worried about trying to latch her on in front of people. After I got comfy with nursing though, I got rid of it and just nursed her whenever she wanted and she never missed it. I just got rid of all the pacis I bought since I don't plan on ever using them again. I like to be a human pacifier.

post #86 of 120
I hate them. My 2 y.o. uses one at night and I don't think he'll ever sleep w/o it. BUT, I know we trained him to do that b/c he doesn't use one at daycare for naps.

my 5 mos. old doesn't use one and I think we may make it w/o.

I guess maybe, bottomline, it depends ont he child's personality. #2 doesn't need it, but his big bro. did.
post #87 of 120
Can I just ask, how long does it take babies to learn to suck their thumbs, and why on earth wouldn't you rather suck your thumb than a piece of plastic? I'm not judging pro-paci folks, I just don't understand. I sucked my thumb until I was 10 or something and I don't think I have any teeth problems. I loved it! And I self-weaned from it, which seems so much kinder than the whole hot sauce thing or whatever, which just seems kind of mean, almost like putting hot sauce on your nipples to wean your kid from the breast!
post #88 of 120
Ubertulip - it usually takes an infant several months before they have enough motor control to coordinate the thumb in the mouth when they want to.
post #89 of 120
Post deleted due to a violation of the user guidelines. ~ Beth
post #90 of 120

I'm pretty sure it wasn't dotcommama who said those things.

I thought dotcommama was acting as a bridge between the pro and anti. I could be a twit, though. LOL I know I'm too lazy to read every word of the thread one more time.
post #91 of 120
Wow talk about a case of mistaken identity!

isaacsmom - I think your boulder was meant for someone else. Please re-read my posts. However you might also want to keep in mind that it is no nicer to call someone a narrow minded twit then to call someone a lazy parent - KWIM? We should all be careful not to judge one another and state our opinions without personal attacks.

post #92 of 120
Originally posted by isaacsmom
...well I wish I had a boulder handy to throw at you...
i try to keep in nonviolent on the boards, you know, whether i agree or disagree.

i'm one of your twits, isaacsmom, though i chose not to post my opinions outright.

i'm also a first time mom, who goes with her mothering instincts and needs no constant reassurance. i mention this because i hope people out there know that being a first time mom does not always = needing constant reassurance, just as being a second time mom doesn't always mean you know it all.

i am sure i make/ will continue to make little mistakes, but i feel good about all of my decisions, each made on my own, including my decsion not to use artificial nipples.

if i didn't feel 100% good about the decsion, i would question if it is the right one, ykwim? that's how i operate.

anyway, i didn't even vote on the poll, i know this is a sensitive subject on the boards and have made the mistake of posting my opinions on the matter in earnest before, and that time people had plenty of boulders handy for me. what a cruel and archaic metaphor.

post #93 of 120
Wow. Must be nice to feel 100% good about all your parenting choices, Tabitha! I certainly don't, and I doubt I am unusual. Life is uncertain, complex and challenging, and parenting is one crazy winding road. All of my parenting decisions are thought out and based on my gut, my instincts and sometimes research, and still are uncertain much of the time. Maybe I'm just not as smart as you.

ubertulip: Jackson could suck his thumb pretty early, but chose not to. But he loved his binky for sleep and the car for a few months... ??
post #94 of 120
I also feel 100% about my parenting choice to allow a few of my kids to have a paci. I think it all depends on the child and the parent. It's definately a personal choice. I honestly don't think there's a right or wrong here. Just a whatever's best for your family thing!
post #95 of 120
dotcommomma & tara-- thanks for answering my question. It must be so frustrating sometimes to be an infant!
post #96 of 120
Ok guys has anyone noticed that only 12% or so of people were saying paci's were bad. There always will be some very judgmental people. But mostly everone here (almost 90%) were not judgmental.

This was not a matter where I could be judged. My first DD would not take a paci and my second could not (she was born with a shortened freunulm which did not allow her sufficient sucking power to keep a paci in, (she was able to BF, Thank God.)
post #97 of 120
Originally posted by Ubertulip
Can I just ask, how long does it take babies to learn to suck their thumbs, and why on earth wouldn't you rather suck your thumb than a piece of plastic? I'm not judging pro-paci folks, I just don't understand. I sucked my thumb until I was 10 or something and I don't think I have any teeth problems.
The reason I chose a paci in place of the thumb:
You can sterilize a paci if needed.
You can limit the amount its used and when its used.
My son is 3 1/2 and still uses his, I'm not intending to force him to go cold turkey in giving it up, but I will continue to encourage him to use it less and less. He won't have it by the time he's 10.

post #98 of 120
Hey Chelly, you're not making fun of me 'cause I sucked my thumb that long, are you? :LOL
post #99 of 120
Can I just ask, how long does it take babies to learn to suck their thumbs, and why on earth wouldn't you rather suck your thumb than a piece of plastic? I'm not judging pro-paci folks, I just don't understand. I sucked my thumb until I was 10 or something and I don't think I have any teeth problems.
What I don't get is why a thumb is ok, but a pacie isn't. They are both ways to self soothe when mom's boob isn't available or isn't preferred. I think there are some ways a thumb is preferable but some ways a pacie is preferable.

Assuming you think a thumb is ok, shouldn't a pacie be ok too as long as it isn't being forced into a babies mouth to "shut it up"?

BTW, Tabitha I thought your post was respectful - one of the "I won't do it but I won't say you are bad for doing it" ones. It didn't offend me and I am pretty easy to set off these days. LOL.

Bottom line for me is that I would love it if I could satisfy all my girls sucking needs and believe me I come close judging by the amount of time they spend attached to me. I have just found that I have to make some compromises to my "absolute AP values" to effectively parent my twins and my older child. Too many wants and only one me, kwim? I just try to make the *best* choices I can since perfect isn't an option.

Sunmountain, if you are out there, since you are the official threadkiller, can you pay this one a visit? Let's put it out of its misery!
post #100 of 120
Originally posted by Ubertulip
Hey Chelly, you're not making fun of me 'cause I sucked my thumb that long, are you? :LOL
:LOL - No (well not really) :LOL

No I am just trying to say its easier to take a paci away than to take the thumb away :LOL
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