Question: Why homeschool preschool children? - Page 5

[raleigh_mom]

I have a 5yo and a 3yo. I say we homeschool.

Do I do anything different than other at-home families? Not really. I'm not a fan of early academics for my kids. Here it is the norm for children to go to preschool and it helps me explain why my children are out with me during the day without doing into a long explanation.

Also, I am enjoying being a part of the "homeschool community". For our family it is a lifestyle choice and it helps explain this group of friends I have (members of our homeschool support group).

For me, homeschooling is not about what we are or are not doing academically or whether we believe in curriculums. It is about our lifestyle and philosophical choices regarding family.

(Oh, and it is an easly way to answer "What school will they go to?" or "Is she in Kindergarten?")

[Lillian J]

Originally Posted by oceanbaby

Although I do have to ask: Why is the homeschooling preschoolers thread the only one for a specific age group? I've never seen a Homeschooling K or 4th Grade thread. Why is that?

Because of threads like this one where some expressed the opinion that there's no reason to apply the term "homeschooling" to children who are not of "school" age. Those who felt strongly that they are homeschooling wanted a place where that was the mutual agreement.

Lillian

[Lillian J]

Originally Posted by slacker_mom

I've read Homeschooling the 3- to 8- Year-Old Child by Linda Dobson and lots of other stuff on how young children learn, and I've been getting pretty enthusiastic about "homeschooling the early years." I have posted to the preschooling homeschool support thread to connect with other parents of young children who aren't using school. It never occured to me that I would feel unwelcome on the mothering home education boards. I don't get how people think conciously providing an environment for early learning at home is such a rediculous idea.

Actually, this whole discussion has taken so many twists and turns that it's turning out huge misconceptions. I've never seen anyone here or anywhere imply that the idea of providing an environment for early learning* at home is a ridiculous idea - or that people providing such a thing for their children are not welcome. The debate comes from some saying that doing so is simply good parenting - something everyone should be doing - but that there's no reason to think of it as "homeschooling" yet, because homeschooling is something people do instead of sending children to school, and that at early ages, that's not the case since they wouldn't be in school. But others have pointed out that many people here are in areas of the country where children are expected to be in "preschool" - so they feel they are "homeschooling preschool" in contrast to sending them off to school.

The discussion in itself doesn't really involve relatively highly charged or controversial subjects - it's just that it's hard to have a normal lively discussion on a computer screen without there being times when people begin to imagine more tone of voice or attitude than someone might have meant. If we were all sitting around a table at a coffee shop, we could have a discussion about all this without so many emotional reactions - we could even raise our voices and wave our hands without anyone taking offense. People could challenge one another and points could be made without things turning personal. In person, it probably wouldn't be taken as anything more than a friendly, animated discussion where everyone was tossing in their two cents.

*Even though there are disagreements over whether that should mean the 3Rs - but that's a whole different subject...

Lillian


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[Wolfmeis]

Originally Posted by oceanbaby

Although I do have to ask: Why is the homeschooling preschoolers thread the only one for a specific age group? I've never seen a Homeschooling K or 4th Grade thread. Why is that?

Because of threads like these. A majority of the people posting on this thread don't homeschool their preschoolers, and their criticism is one more sneering dismissal from some of the people on this board. I have experienced it myself, and my daughter is 6. I answered a post about how your child deals with attention in public, and my response was brushed aside with "your child is so little, your experience doesn't count." The search function is down ( ) or you could see how bad it gets in here, on this "support" board. People have left the board recently over things like this. A dedicated thread lets them have a "stay off our thread, please" place where they can talk amongst themselves.

[aside: I HATE THE WORD PRESCHOOLER. My kids won't be enrolled in "school" and hence aren't pre- anything. ]

IMO if you're "unschooling" your preschooler, then yeah it's kind of dorky to insist on defining yourself as a homeschooler, only because unschooling truly is an extension of parenting. (I am including myself here!) It's fun and it's awesome, but it's not necessarily a structured educational philosophy like Montessori or Waldorf that forms a certain...flavor... of a childhood experience. (We were a Montessori family.)

Having said that, I am from one of those regions where preschool does not seem optional. Even at TWO people would be startled to see me with my child in tow because "shouldn't she be in school?" There was significant external pressure to make sure my child wasn't left behind. My dd is also anaphylactic to peanuts so I couldn't just leave her in a preschool environment, even for a few hours a week.

But early childhood education is extremely important and I think the preschool curriculum is in fact, "real" education. We may just be playing with blocks or goo, but it is done mindfully. There are entire bodies of work dedicated to the kind of prepared environment we've provided our tots, and that is not something you can just sweep away because you're hung on a label.

I can see how women with 8 and 9 and 14 year olds can see the difference between the two, because it is much easier to work with a preschool aged child in many respects. But it's unwise and unkind to consistently insult the young homeschooling Mama. Children grow, you know? If this is a community you value, it doesn't make sense to insult the very mothers who in a few short years will be "legitimate" homeschooling peers to you. The ones who do the smearing know they are hurting feelings, and personally I can only imagine they get some form of baser gratification for doing it.

[Wolfmeis]

heh heh

If I weren't tending to my preschoolers, Lillian , we would have posted at the same time. :

[eminer]

Originally Posted by Wolfmeis

IMO if you're "unschooling" your preschooler, then yeah it's kind of dorky to insist on defining yourself as a homeschooler

: Doesn't anyone love me?

[eloquence]

Originally Posted by Lillian J

Actually, this whole discussion has taken so many twists and turns that it's turning out huge misconceptions. I've never seen anyone here or anywhere imply that the idea of providing an environment for early learning* at home is a ridiculous idea - or that people providing such a thing for their children are not welcome. The debate comes from some saying that doing so is simply good parenting - something everyone should be doing - but that there's no reason to think of it as "homeschooling" yet, because homeschooling is something people do instead of sending children to school, and that at early ages, that's not the case since they wouldn't be in school. But others have pointed out that many people here are in areas of the country where children are expected to be in "preschool" - so they feel they are "homeschooling preschool" in contrast to sending them off to school.

The discussion in itself doesn't really involve relatively highly charged or controversial subjects - it's just that it's hard to have a normal lively discussion on a computer screen without there being times when people begin to imagine more tone of voice or attitude than someone might have meant. If we were all sitting around a table at a coffee shop, we could have a discussion about all this without so many emotional reactions - we could even raise our voices and wave our hands without anyone taking offense. People could challenge one another and points could be made without things turning personal. In person, it probably wouldn't be taken as anything more than a friendly, animated discussion where everyone was tossing in their two cents.

Thank you Lillian.

Okay, I am going to go take a , I am so sleepy.:yawning:

[eminer]

You know what, though? I AM both silly and dorky. And I'm proud to be.

[Wolfmeis]

I DO love you eminer!!!!!!!!

We're eclectic homeschoolers to a 6 yo girl and a 4 yo boy. Ask my homies...silly and dorky??? That would be me. :

[natashaccat]

Originally Posted by eminer

: Doesn't anyone love me?

Yeah me too, I come to this HSing board because I just want to chit chat with other mom's who share similiar interests and educational philosophies.

Call me a dork if you want, I'm a grown up and can handle it but that sort of labling and name calling behavior is exactly why I'm not sending my child to institutionalized school. I don't want her exposed to folks (children and adults) who think it's socially acceptable to so flipantly judge her as she grows and experiments with new ideas and aspects of her personal identity.

[slacker_mom]

Originally Posted by Lillian J

I've never seen anyone here or anywhere imply that the idea of providing an environment for early learning* at home is a ridiculous idea - or that people providing such a thing for their children are not welcome.

I suppose the words rediculous or unwelcome haven't been used, but that's the vibe I feel coming off of this thread. Perhaps I am being too sensitive, and reading something into this thread that just isn't there.

I couldn't sit around in a coffee shop having this discussion, because I haven't found anyone in my zipcode who would have this conversation.

What would you call it now, if it's not "homeschooling" yet? And when does it become homeschooling? I am "parenting," yes, but what I am doing is very different from what pretty much every other parent I know is doing. They send them off to daycare and then preschool as soon as they can.

[dharmamama]

I have gone through fits of "more structured" homeschooling of my preschoolers (which means maybe 1/2 an hour a day of an activity I have planned beforehand which could be called academic) and fits of "less structured" homeschooling of my preschoolers (which would consist of just hanging around and maybe doing a spontaneous academic activity) and I call myself a homeschooler because I have a different mindset on child development and family life than most of the schoolers I know.

When I did do "more structured" homeschooling it was for two main reasons: My daughter desired something structured and I enjoyed the feeling of formally introducing my children to things.

We have a group in my city specifically for "young homeschoolers," roughly ages 2-7. We all have varying degrees of structure, from school-at-homers to unschoolers. We all feel we are homeschooling because our mindset and values are different from schoolers'.

Namaste!

[Lillian J]

Originally Posted by slacker_mom

I suppose the words rediculous or unwelcome haven't been used, but that's the vibe I feel coming off of this thread. Perhaps I am being too sensitive, and reading something into this thread that just isn't there.

For what it's worth, I think there have just been a series of remarks that started getting personal somewhere along the way, gathering static; and that's where the "vibe" has come from.

It's always tricky to imagine the real people and intentions behind the screens. In fact, I recently had a strange email conversation with a friend I know in real life. It was about certain Eskimo customs, f'r Pete's sake - not anything either of us was personally concerned about in the least. At one point, she thought I was being indignant (which I wasn't), and wrote: "You know I'm not arguing with you, right?" I wrote back "Huh? Arguing? I thought we were just trying to figure this out together..." It took a couple more emails before we finally figured out together that I'd used an expression she'd completely misinterpreted. If this had taken place onscreen between two people who didn't even know one another online, much less in person, it could have taken on a whole other tone - especially if others had jumped in to take sides about the non-argument.

I couldn't sit around in a coffee shop having this discussion, because I haven't found anyone in my zipcode who would have this conversation.

Yeah, they're not that easy to find. For one thing, when people get together in person, they so often go off on other things that are more concrete immediate concerns. I always had my most indepth conversations about "homeschooling" online - with strangers (but many of us have since met in real life and maintained friendships). I think that's because people are more in touch with more philosophical things when they're alone with their thoughts at home. I must say, come to think of it, that some of them were not even people with whom I originally had a great online rapport with - and that's because online communication is so complex. And I remember one meeting with someone who was open-mouth shocked and disappointed at who I really was - I don't who in the world she was expecting, but it wasn't me! I think she might have been expecting someone in hippie beads and tie-dye or something...

- Lillian

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[wende]

Because I don't want to debate the issue I haven't really read most of the thread so I'll just give my insight.

I've never really considered homeschooling a preschooler until recently. Since I didn't start homeschooling until a couple of years ago my oldest 3 have all gone to public school. When my 14 yo was preschool aged I asked her if she wanted to go to preschool. She told me that no, she wasn't ready to start school and would wait until kindergarten. Because she decided not to do formal preschool I "homeschooled" her without even realizing it. She was one who loved to learn so she taught herself to read with some help from me. We did shapes and numbers and colors and we did artwork and cooked together and did whatever learning activities we felt like doing. I was actively teaching her a lot of the time but because it's what she wanted and enjoyed.

When my next 2 were old enough they both wanted to go to preschool so they did. My 11yo did not learn to read until she was in the 1st grade and I didn't do nearly as much "teaching" with her as I did with my 14yo. However, she wasn't one who could be "taught" either. She could not sit still while I tried to teach her letter sounds so I just let her be. She now loves to read.

I took a more unschooling approach with my 7yo w/o realizing it. He learned very quickly but did not learn in a traditional way. He could read and write huge words and had an amazing vocabulary before he started kindergarten but his teacher could not see that because she wanted him to do what the other kids were doing...small words, sounding out, etc. He wasn't into it. She told me that he was "behind". However, his preschool teachers were amazed with what he knew because he was the youngest in class (an August 30th birthday so he was 5 just days before kindergarten started) and said that I obviously worked very hard with him at home. I wasn't sure how to take that because I hadn't worked very hard with him. I let him do his own thing and showed him things according to what his interests were. I didn't feel like I'd actually done anything at all.

So now, my 4th child has just turned 3. I realized that he's preschool aged. Now that I'm homeschooling my kids I won't be sending him to preschool but then I guess as the school year gears back up I'll probably call him a homeschooler for practical purposes. People will inevitably ask if he's going to preschool because it's assumed that 3 and 4 year olds will. I will tell them that he's homeschooled, and I guess he will be. I mean, we'll read and do shapes and colors and numbers and make play-doh and paint and cook and do all the things that we do regularly anyhow. I will probably join in on the homeschooling a preschooler support thread for ideas on new things to do to keep him busy. I think that as a homeschooler we are always up for new and exciting ideas and I think that parents of preschoolers can use all the support that they can get anyhow.

Some children obviously need more structure than others. Some thrive on "school at home" while others thrive on a more free way of learning. Since, especially in the homeschooling community, families tend to vary in ages from teen agers to babies, it's great to be able to refer to what others are doing and go "OH, that's an awsome idea!" It's also great to be able to figure out how to incorporate different learning styles in your household.

For those who are just getting started in homeschooling I think "schooling" a preschooler is a great way to learn about different teaching/learning styles and to learn about your own childs interests and abilities and it's great to have others who are there with you struggling and enjoying in similar ways to yourself.

[quaz]

For those who are just getting started in homeschooling I think "schooling" a preschooler is a great way to learn about different teaching/learning styles and to learn about your own childs interests and abilities and it's great to have others who are there with you struggling and enjoying in similar ways to yourself.


OOOH!! I love this statement. I think this perfectly describes what we are doing. Through research/learning, I've learned a tons. By following dd, I've learned a ton about her personality and learning style. So, eclectic unschooling montessoresque for us.

Tammy

[eminer]

Originally Posted by Wolfmeis

I DO love you eminer!!!!!!!!

Aw, shucks.

[oceanbaby]

Just so no one misunderstands, I didn't ask why there was a hs preschoolers thread because I thought there shouldn't be one. I was just wondering why so many more people are interested in talking about hs'ing 2-5yos than any other age group, so much so that they have a very active thread about it. Honestly, it made me worry that maybe there were less people hs'ing children older than 5. And since I will be newly hs'ing my 5yo this fall, I worry about these kinds of things!

[lilyka]

Originally Posted by Dar

And I consider it simply parenting...

dar

yeah (and I know I am getting ion on this late)

I don't consider this educating any more than I consider my reading to my children homeschooling. or counting steps or washing dishes. we are just living and they are playing and learning like preschoolers do. I guess I could lock them in a closet and ignore them all day but they are so gosh darn cute when covered with paint

I guess my whole perspective on this is different. I don't really consider preschol education. I consider it more glorified babysitting and what they spread out over 3-4 years can easily be done in the first few months of kindergarten and is therefore largely unessecary all together. However what it does do is socialize them and gradually allow them to adapt to the rigors of instatutional classroom life. so I just don't see any reason to say you are home preschooling a child because in my humble opinion if you are not sending your child there is no reason for pre-school. they are not pre-homeschoolers. they have the home thing and the learning from mom thing pretty much under control. they are just children. regardless of how you spend your days.

but at the same time I don't care what people choose to call themselves. lables mean nothing to me.

[lauracd]

I guess there will always be two camps to this....

....either way I think most of the mothers on this board are very active and involved in their children's lives whether they call it homeschooling preschool or just parenting. That is the great thing. This is not the norm for many, many parents so I'm glad to see it is the norm here on this board.

Since I've become interested in homeschooling my preschoolers I have found many books talking about this and giving me ideas. Because pre-school and pre-k are the norm here I am answering all who question why my boys aren't in preschool with the answer that I am homeschooling----it just seems to be an easy and quick answer to an actually complicated question. Truly it is none of their business but I was brought up in the south so I try to be polite.

[Dar]

Originally Posted by lauracd

....either way I think most of the mothers on this board are very active and involved in their children's lives whether they call it homeschooling preschool or just parenting. That is the great thing.

I'll just ditto that, because between work and Driving Miss Rain and a migraine I've been MIA here for the past day and a half... and Eloquence eloquently said much of what I would have said, and Lillian nicely summed up the two points of view in the issue.

I suppose I would like to hear what mothers of young children who plan to school would say about the issue, but this is probably the wrong place to find those answers...

Dar