Where do I start?

[charmcitymama]

I feel like things (me and her) are just so out of control with dd who is amost 3. I just feel like every day I am beyond frustrated, and I lose my patient so quickly. I just feel like I have nothing to put in that space where patience should be. So, I don't know how I am going to handle the situation, or having any idea how I am going to do so in the future. I feel so depleted! I have a 4 month old, too. I just want dd1 to "listen" but, I feel like : I am just being ineffective and upsetting us all. I have even yelled at her today.

[sweetest]

My dd will be 3 in a month and I find I'm short on patience too. I think its because she is acting "big" but still such a baby. Im just expecting too much from her It doesnt help that she has a huge vocabulary, but has started to stutter and get fustrated easily when trying to talk. She needs extra patience, not less.

When I feel at my wits end, I have to step back and look at her and see the baby she is. Usually the clashes occur because Im asking too much.

[trinasmom]

I am not as patient with dd - age 5 as I should be. I have to remind myself she is just a child. I also expect too much from her. The past few weeks I have just stepped back and observed. Yes it takes a little longer for her to do something that I could do in under a minute, but she is gaining knowledge and self esteem from doing it herself. I remind myself these years are all too fleeting, and when I look back on them I want to remember a smiling, laughing happy child, not someone who was screamed at constantly. At times I leave the room for a few minutes just to chill. I sing a silly song, or breathe deep, anything to calm down before I lose it.

[KatSG]

I'm in the same boat. My newborn is a month old and dd1 is 2.75 yo. I can deal with almost everything (if I really, really work at it) except that she hurts the baby--a lot. I can't leave her in the room alone with the baby for even a minute. I don't think she means to, but she does the same things over and over--pinches, hits her face, picks up her up by her arms and then drops her.

And what I just said about handling everything else? That's a lie. I have to work really hard to keep my voice calm. Maybe I am expecting too much. She just seems so big now...

[jlpumkin]

I too have this issue often. I agree 100% that it occurs most often when I am expecting too much out of my oldest. Pre-baby brother we rarely had these issues. Once I became light on sleep my patience went right out the window. Sometimes she seems so big, then other times just like a baby herself. Now that youngest is 6 mos and getting more independent - wants to try crawling I think it's improving. I can spend more time remembering her capabilities. Then again maybe it's the return of one on one attention that has improved the situation? Either way that's what is curing our ills here.