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Is this going to be anyone's last baby? - Page 2

post #21 of 31
Woo-hoo. Talked to DH tonite (actually he just made it a statement, really) that although he's pretty sure he won't change his mind on having #3, he's going to put off the Big V and is okay with me getting the non-hormonal IUD in the interim! That way, once Bean gets a little older (and me too (I just turned 35)), we can re-evaluate. I'm sooo happy..... :

I'm sorry for those of you that are feeling badly about not having any more. I hope my sharing my happiness doesn't seem overly selfish..
post #22 of 31
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Momto1and1ontheway
Woo-hoo. Talked to DH tonite (actually he just made it a statement, really) that although he's pretty sure he won't change his mind on having #3, he's going to put off the Big V and is okay with me getting the non-hormonal IUD in the interim! That way, once Bean gets a little older (and me too (I just turned 35)), we can re-evaluate. I'm sooo happy..... :

I'm sorry for those of you that are feeling badly about not having any more. I hope my sharing my happiness doesn't seem overly selfish..
Not at all. I am glad it is working out well for you.
post #23 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by Momto1and1ontheway
Woo-hoo. Talked to DH tonite (actually he just made it a statement, really) that although he's pretty sure he won't change his mind on having #3, he's going to put off the Big V and is okay with me getting the non-hormonal IUD in the interim! That way, once Bean gets a little older (and me too (I just turned 35)), we can re-evaluate. I'm sooo happy..... :

I'm sorry for those of you that are feeling badly about not having any more. I hope my sharing my happiness doesn't seem overly selfish..
Well, I admit to being maybe a tad jealous. glad your dh is open to talking about it later!

But really, we may end up with #4 yet... dh has not wanted to talk about having another child until each baby was over a year old which is fine because I'd never want to ttc before 18-24mo anyway. I have hope... :
post #24 of 31
i'm finding my *own* self on the fence... i love, love, loved my birth experience and i am drinking in this baby and i love the idea of a third and a bigger, more boistrous family but...

i think about another pregnancy...
another 2-3 years of bf'ing (beyond the 3 i'm in for with this ds, i assume)
having to go through "getting my body back"
putting off major projects, potential work etc...
the cost, logistical implications of a bigger family

the jump from 2 to 3 seems big... you need a bigger car, 2 bedrooms are really not sustainable (at least, not for us) not to mention saving for college, traveling (even to visit family far away, not vacations). i dunno. it's a much bigger decison than having 2. and dh is really not into it. he may change his mind when ds is bigger and be open to it, but i know he misses his time, reliable sleep, etc..

it's like i want the outcome, but the reality of making it happen holds me back. and it makes me sad that i can't just embrace all of it, you know?

sigh. i keep reminding myself that it's not like i need to decide today! at
this point, i at least have dh agreeing to not do the V until 3 years out.
post #25 of 31
I'm a fence rider too. I would love one more, but DH is ADAMANT about being done! And I see his points, I really do, but the thought of never being pregnant again, and never holding a precious newborn is too hard to realize, ya know?? So, more than likely, we're done, but we'll see. Also, I would have to be able to stop doing daycare if we were going to have another one. It was soooo hard being pregnant, sick, and tired, and taking care of all the other kids.
post #26 of 31
It depends on when you asked us...During pregnancy,we both said we're done.In fact I was done after #3 and tried to say it, but felt a strong impression of another boy.We have him now,but I'm not sure if we are done or not.We ARE done for this lifestyle.We cannot have more in this income bracket,or in this house.I may make a career of mothering though,and make $ sharing what I know through birth classes,birth photography,lactation consulting,doula work,writing,midwifery,etc...maybe daycare.If we can double our curent income,and move to a more ideal space,we can have a bunch more babies.I need to be able to afford a chiropractor,masseusse,and the ultimate healthy diet and mothers helper.I could see having another girl,and possibly more.(Dh is the 7th of 8 kids,and I am the 3rd of 7 kids.)We know a number of families with 8-10 kids...my mw has 10.We'll see.As things are now though,4 is way pushing it!
post #27 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by Momto1and1ontheway
Woo-hoo. Talked to DH tonite (actually he just made it a statement, really) that although he's pretty sure he won't change his mind on having #3, he's going to put off the Big V and is okay with me getting the non-hormonal IUD in the interim! That way, once Bean gets a little older (and me too (I just turned 35)), we can re-evaluate. I'm sooo happy..... :
We just decided to put off the big V as well. I can't say that we will have another, but I am glad that we havethe option open. Making this decision has really taken a loadoff of my mind.
post #28 of 31
We're done w/ our 2 boys. It's bittersweet, I guess, but makes sense for SOOO many reasons. Both my pregnancies ended w/ bedrest, and we very nearly lost Patrick at 29 wks, we can't financially afford another, we have ecological concerns that dictate 2 is enough, the list goes on. Someday we may adopt, but it isn't in the official plan right now.
post #29 of 31
Quote:
Originally Posted by newmainer
i'm finding my *own* self on the fence... i love, love, loved my birth experience and i am drinking in this baby and i love the idea of a third and a bigger, more boistrous family but...

i think about another pregnancy...
another 2-3 years of bf'ing (beyond the 3 i'm in for with this ds, i assume)
having to go through "getting my body back"
putting off major projects, potential work etc...
the cost, logistical implications of a bigger family

the jump from 2 to 3 seems big... you need a bigger car, 2 bedrooms are really not sustainable (at least, not for us) not to mention saving for college, traveling (even to visit family far away, not vacations). i dunno. it's a much bigger decison than having 2. and dh is really not into it. he may change his mind when ds is bigger and be open to it, but i know he misses his time, reliable sleep, etc..

it's like i want the outcome, but the reality of making it happen holds me back. and it makes me sad that i can't just embrace all of it, you know?

sigh. i keep reminding myself that it's not like i need to decide today! at
this point, i at least have dh agreeing to not do the V until 3 years out.
This is exactly where I am. Only dh is plenty open to 3. We just make gorgeous babies! But I think I'm just going to throw myself into parenting these two while they're very little and call it good. Quit while we're ahead. I don't like being pregnant and my body is taking a looong time to recover this time. I'm shocked that I'd even consider a third, but there are times when it's tempting...
post #30 of 31
I never thought I would say this but 4 may be all for us. Dh would go for 1 more but I am not dealing with the extra work so well as i hoped. I love giving birth like others have said and love baby land but the older kids need me and I am not able to be spread that thin. I guess I should post this in not the mom i want to be thread. But I think of another pregnancy as putting off my older kids that much longer as I was/am incredibly cranky this last pg and baby moon time. DH may be facing the big V (willingly of course).
post #31 of 31
I would like two or three more. DH usually laughs at me but he's not opposed. We think we'd like to adopt and do foster care as well, especially with older kiddos. Not that I'd resist a baby!
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