My water broke around 7:30 in the morning on Tuesday June 27, 2006. Right away I was excited because this was the first time my water had ever released spontaneously. I called a couple of friends to tell them that this was the day!
My surges were 20 minutes apart for hours and hours then they finally creeped up to 10 minutes apart, but it was a gentle transition. Kara and Sharon were here, as was my mother. Ellen joined us later. She brought the best chicken soup I have ever had! Every once in awhile I would say, “That’s another one” and Sharon would keep track of time while Kara took notes. I had waited to get into the pool for fear of stalling out my labor. Finally, I just knew that I couldn’t be comfortable a moment longer without water, so I got in. All day long I had just done what my body felt like doing, whatever felt right and that moment was no exception. As I stepped in Kara asked me, “are you going to leave your shirt on?” I replied no, but did it anyway, just because it felt right at the time. (It was the softest t-shirt I own!) I floated there for the next few hours and I wouldn’t have it any other way! As the surges became more intense, I went deeper into relaxation. I floated on my back, keeping my ears under water to block out noise and promote relaxation. As I swayed back and forth in the water, my hair swept past my shoulders, providing a gentle tickling sensation that really helped me relax! At times I would swing my hips back and forth as if they were in a hammock. I pictured the bellydancing classes I had been taking during this pregnancy. I thought a lot about how awesome, how miraculous and how powerful my body was that it could create a life and birth that life. I focused on how wonderful this body is and how I really CAN do this!
I had thought of her birth only as something I was giving to HER. I didn’t realize at the time how healing this birth would be for ME. While floating in the water going deeper and deeper into relaxation, I realized just how amazing my body is. My vagina can grip his penis until it takes his breath away and can relax and expand big enough to let his child be born. How can I not think that is ABSOLUTELY AMAZING?! I will forever pity men that they cannot experience this magnificent moment. This birth meant not only the beginning of life for Claire, but the end of the torment that I had endured due to abuse. With this birth I became acutely aware of just how amazing my body is and I cannot adequately explain how life-affirming that was! I felt like I floated away my shame, floated away my cares and allowed my body to do what it was MADE to do! I allowed my body to fulfill her destiny.
I will never see Kirk the same way again. He has become the embodiment of the Ultimate Man to me. The fact that he was so calm, so there in the moment and so in tune with what was going on,……well, words just can not describe the way I feel about him now. When I talk to him about that day, that very moment, I am moved to tears. Together we created her and together we birthed her. I have used the word amazing over and over again and I must say that every single day I am still amazed that by the experience. It was life-affirming and self-affirming.
My surges were 20 minutes apart for hours and hours then they finally creeped up to 10 minutes apart, but it was a gentle transition. Kara and Sharon were here, as was my mother. Ellen joined us later. She brought the best chicken soup I have ever had! Every once in awhile I would say, “That’s another one” and Sharon would keep track of time while Kara took notes. I had waited to get into the pool for fear of stalling out my labor. Finally, I just knew that I couldn’t be comfortable a moment longer without water, so I got in. All day long I had just done what my body felt like doing, whatever felt right and that moment was no exception. As I stepped in Kara asked me, “are you going to leave your shirt on?” I replied no, but did it anyway, just because it felt right at the time. (It was the softest t-shirt I own!) I floated there for the next few hours and I wouldn’t have it any other way! As the surges became more intense, I went deeper into relaxation. I floated on my back, keeping my ears under water to block out noise and promote relaxation. As I swayed back and forth in the water, my hair swept past my shoulders, providing a gentle tickling sensation that really helped me relax! At times I would swing my hips back and forth as if they were in a hammock. I pictured the bellydancing classes I had been taking during this pregnancy. I thought a lot about how awesome, how miraculous and how powerful my body was that it could create a life and birth that life. I focused on how wonderful this body is and how I really CAN do this!
I had thought of her birth only as something I was giving to HER. I didn’t realize at the time how healing this birth would be for ME. While floating in the water going deeper and deeper into relaxation, I realized just how amazing my body is. My vagina can grip his penis until it takes his breath away and can relax and expand big enough to let his child be born. How can I not think that is ABSOLUTELY AMAZING?! I will forever pity men that they cannot experience this magnificent moment. This birth meant not only the beginning of life for Claire, but the end of the torment that I had endured due to abuse. With this birth I became acutely aware of just how amazing my body is and I cannot adequately explain how life-affirming that was! I felt like I floated away my shame, floated away my cares and allowed my body to do what it was MADE to do! I allowed my body to fulfill her destiny.
I will never see Kirk the same way again. He has become the embodiment of the Ultimate Man to me. The fact that he was so calm, so there in the moment and so in tune with what was going on,……well, words just can not describe the way I feel about him now. When I talk to him about that day, that very moment, I am moved to tears. Together we created her and together we birthed her. I have used the word amazing over and over again and I must say that every single day I am still amazed that by the experience. It was life-affirming and self-affirming.
