Paisley, yay that your numbers are so good! How long will you be doing the supplementation?
LotusDebi, I'm sorry for your loss. I know what you mean about checking for blood every time. This is such a stressful time.
Llyra, I'm so sorry for the loss of your son. It's such a horrible experience to feel safe, and then have that happen.
My biggest fear is another missed miscarriage. With our first pregnancy in 2001, we discovered at 14 weeks that the babe had died at around 10 weeks. I waited 3 more weeks to miscarry naturally, but my body refused. Looking back, I really see the evidence that things were going badly, but I was oblivious at the time. Mainly the fact that I never got very strong pregnancy symptoms, but other things should have clued me in too. It was my first, and I didn't know any better.
With DD's pregnancy after that, I was a lot more confident that things were going well because I was so very badly sick. When that let up at 13 weeks, I got paranoid and did an hCG draw which came back fine. When the midwife could hear the heartbeat at 16 1/2 weeks with the fetoscope I was so happy. And I could feel movements not long after that.
I miscarried again the beginning of March, naturally this time. It was an early loss, and I attribute it to being low weight and I was still nursing a little bit too... I think my body refused to put up with all that. I didn't have any early pregnancy signs with that one either.
I've gained enough weight to make me comfortable since then, and my daughter weaned herself. I'm feeling good strong symptoms and I will continue to assume that this pregnancy is viable. But at the same time, I'm being realistic... I've told DD that sometimes things happen to babies and if they come out too early they won't make it. She seems to understand, and sometimes she sits on my lap when I'm here at MDC and she'll see an angel in a siggy and say "Oh, no, that mommy had a baby that died." However, she has been exposed to life and death from sort of a very early age because we rescue (and adopt out) orphaned kittens and sometimes they come to me way too weak and little and we have lost a couple of them -- sometimes I wonder how healthy it is for her to be exposed to that kind of reality, but she seems to be a pretty well adjusted little girl. Anyway, I just had to tell her I was pregnant this time (she didn't know we were pregnant in February, but she came up to me and said that she was going to be her daddy's movie buddy, and the little sister in my tummy was going to be my ski buddy
). And again, in June, she told me I had a baby in my tummy.... so of course I had to let her know she was right.
I'm sorry this was so long. It's really helpful to me to say all this though.
I won't be doing doppler or u/s unless I lose the pregnancy signs I have now, or start to bleed. The cramps seem to be going away, so I'm relieved about that. It's hard to rely on my symptoms alone, but I'm not convinced about the safety of doppler/us... so it's all I've got for now. And then of course, there are times when the signs aren't so strong, like Llyra mentioned, and then I'm stressed.
If anyone made it this far through my post
, will anyone else be going through pregnancy after a loss but not doing doppler?
OK, all you little ones, GROW and STICK please!