Weekly Thread: July 2nd - 9th

[shalena]

Congrats to all of us newly pregnant mamas! I recognize alot of usernames here from the TTC forums.
I guess I'll start this off with a few questions, feel free to ignore them and just talk about whatever is on your mind. The weekly thread is just a place to share, vent, and update. Whatever you want it to be!

What kind of birth are you planning? If you've had previous pregnancies, did you have an uneventful pregnancy before this? ARe you hoping for a girl or a boy?


My DH and I are wanting to have a home waterbirth this time around. My son, Julian was born at a birth center and we had a great waterbirth. It was peaceful, and I felt very comfortable there. Even so, I think it would be wonderful to give birth at home. No traffic, no unfamilar faces, just myself, my family and my midwife.

I am not to worried this time around, but I had preterm labor last pregnancy at 32 weeks. I was dehydrated, but also had bacterial vaginosis and a slight UTI. I am planning on eating better, and keeping well hydrated to stay healthier this time around. I was in the hospital for 7 days, and on top of preterm labor ended up with side effects from the mag sulfate they put me on (pulmanary edema).
After being released i went back to my midwives and went into labor naturally at 39 weeks 6 days.

I'd love a girl, but its more economical for us to have another boy. We already have all the clothes and lots of boy cloth diapers. Either way, we'll be happy.


I am excited to contact my midwives and let them know I'm pregnant again. I'm not sure when is a good time, I don't want to do it to early. Anyone have any thoughts on this?

[lunadoula]

Thanks so much for making this thread! This is our first baby, and we're planning a homebirth. We'll have a waterbirth tub but I don't care if I just use it for labor or actually end up giving birth in it - we'll just see how I feel at the time!

We're both kind of hoping for a girl, but I don't think either of us will be disappointed either way. We don't really believe in the whole "gender binary" thing to be honest (that those born female necessarily end up as girls, etc) so we just hope baby is healthy.

Not much else to say at this point - just very bloated and also tired on and off. Trying to let go of worries about miscarriage since I am so early (4w 4 days).

FWIW I called the midwife this past weekend - it's never too early IMO! Even if they don't see you for awhile it's good to let them know and get on the schedule.

[Leilalu]

lurking here:
*see preg after loss thead in this group*
I am planning on a cesearean(in my mind) this time. That way, according to past occurance maybe I will have a natural birth!
Seriously, I am wanting a quiet birth at home. I plan to see my OB, and will probably have to plan for a VBAC, or planned cesearean with him. But I hope to slip the baby out accidentally at home

[lotusdebi]

I'm planning a home waterbirth. My pregnancy with my son was uneventful, except for the major mood swings and insanity. He got stuck on the way out (moderate shoulder dystocia), but the midwife got him out, and he was pretty much fine. So, some minor concerns about giving birth, but nothing big. My big concerns are about my pregnancy, since I miscarried earlier this year. So, I'm not jumping for joy yet. Too much anxiety still.
Having either a girl or boy is fine with me. But, I think I'll be having a girl, just because of the dreams I've had. I'm both terrified of having a girl, and looking forward to it. If I have a girl, she'll be wearing a lot of her brother's hand-me-downs. So, I kinda hope she won't be the frilly type; my son only has a couple of dresses.

I have no idea when to contact the midwives, shalena. I guess it depends on how early they'd want to see you. I don't anticipate interviewing the midwives I have to choose from until August at the very earliest. My son's birthday is coming up later this month, so we're going to be swamped for a while!

[celesterra]

i recognize some names from ttc, too -

i posted on the pg after loss thread too... i'm so so so thrilled to be here and to be feeling sick. SO THRILLED. with my last pregnancy (lost), i didn't have much in the way of symptoms. this time, i tested because of the nausea/ queasies. tonight i'm happy to be feeling sick after eating.

i know - crazy, right? i don't care. all day long i was grateful for my sore bbs - a little pregnancy monitor.

i am hoping and will do everything i can to have a birth center birth. we have a lovely one close-by. i am "high risk" because of a genetic disease (glass bones disease) but it is very mild, and every perinatologist we've consulted has recommended a gentle vaginal birth. i also have just in the past 2 months developed high blood pressure, but it's under control now and i hope to be able to get off the meds in the first trimester.

as for sex, i have to say that i totally want a girl. i'm not sure why, since i have done so much childcare and always have fallen for the little boys, but that's what my heart says. DH definitely wants a boy. we are actually both hoping for twins, as we just completed a cycle of fertility treatment.

is anyone else working outside the home? i've just taken over for the marketing director of our company and am a little nervous about how to handle the upcoming energy drain.

[Kathryn]

Originally Posted by lotusdebi

I'm planning a home waterbirth. My pregnancy with my son was uneventful, except for the major mood swings and insanity. He got stuck on the way out (moderate shoulder dystocia), but the midwife got him out, and he was pretty much fine. So, some minor concerns about giving birth, but nothing big. My big concerns are about my pregnancy, since I miscarried earlier this year. So, I'm not jumping for joy yet. Too much anxiety still.
Having either a girl or boy is fine with me. But, I think I'll be having a girl, just because of the dreams I've had. I'm both terrified of having a girl, and looking forward to it. If I have a girl, she'll be wearing a lot of her brother's hand-me-downs. So, I kinda hope she won't be the frilly type; my son only has a couple of dresses.

I have no idea when to contact the midwives, shalena. I guess it depends on how early they'd want to see you. I don't anticipate interviewing the midwives I have to choose from until August at the very earliest. My son's birthday is coming up later this month, so we're going to be swamped for a while!

Just popping in from the Oct DDC. : Hi sweets! Congrats. I am sending major sticky vibes your way.

[lotusdebi]

Thank you, Kathryn! I really appreciate it!

[Yo Becca]

Hi everybody!!

***Hi Celeste** Super glad we're here!!

My first preg. was fairly uneventful except for crazy swelling and carpal tunnel - but it was also a hot Georgia summer with no a/c. I had a significant amount of puking - partly from morning sickness and partly from overheating (I'd get hot in the shower and puke). But I only puked on the side of the road once! I gave birth at a pretty woman-friendly hospital in atlanta with a midwife. We grudgingly negotiated pitocin after I had stalled for several hours, but other than that no meds. I wish it had been completely med-free.

We have now moved to a smaller city - only 2 midwives in the city, so if you go into labor every 3rd day you get stuck with an OB. After coaching my SIL's unmedicated birth - with an OB at the hospital - I was definitely planning a homebirth. But now DH and I are moving to China in 6 weeks. I've been looking online but can't find anything about homebirth in China - I would only be comfortable with a midwife I felt comfortable with. The c-sec rate is crazy high there (60% - b/c insurance doesn't cover any pain meds for vaginal delivery, so women chose c-sec so they can get pain meds). I've found out about a birthcenter in Shanghai with a birthtub so I might go that route - although I am not really interested in a waterbirth - I'd rather be out and dry and mobile. But if that's the route to encourage a natural delivery, I'll explore it.

Celeste - all those icky feelings are good news. Maybe it's just a myth, but I've always heard that strong morning sickness is a good sign of a sticky babe - those hormones pumping. Hmm...twins.

Leilalu - I'm all about preparing for the one thing b/c you always get what you aren't expecting. Is there a local ICAN chapter near you?

On gender - Hmmmm...I have one girl and I'd love another. DH would like a boy (which I understand b/c I shamelessly wanted a girl the first time). It would definitely be cheaper to have a girl - lots of girly clothes. But I've always bought gender neutral diapers, PJ's, onesies, shorts, etc. Plus I have 2 nephews to get hand-me-downs from (the youngest is 9 weeks, so we could really get some good hand me downs). I would be happy with a healthy child, whatever their gender/gender expression might be.

I like this thread - easier to access than opening all the threads!

[melanie83103]

I'm going to give birth in a hospital. But, I found the most wonderful midwife that works at a nearby hospital that has HUGE birth tubs! So I'm hoping for a waterbirth. And if not, then I plan to do some of my laboring in the tub....

I had a major hemmorage (sp?) after my son's birth. That makes me afraid to even try a homebirth or birth center. I lost so much blood, and the only way they could stop it was with a shot. I have been told that this shot (don't know the name of the drug...) is not available outside of a hospital environment. Anyone know if that's true?

[lunadoula]

Originally Posted by melanie83103

I had a major hemmorage (sp?) after my son's birth. That makes me afraid to even try a homebirth or birth center. I lost so much blood, and the only way they could stop it was with a shot. I have been told that this shot (don't know the name of the drug...) is not available outside of a hospital environment. Anyone know if that's true?

Melanie- I'm sorry your son's birth was so traumatic. I hope it will be better this time around. Could you ask what the shot is? The only thing I could think of was pitocin, and even most homebirth midwives (around here, anyways) legally carry it around just in case of hemorrage. So if that's the case I would say it is not true that it's not available outside hospitals. I would just ask your Dr. what the shot was, and then if you decide to interview midwives/birth centers make sure they have it available, or discuss your history with them and see if they would still be willing to take you as a client.

[Arwyn]

Melanie - most homebirth midwives carry pitocin and methergine to control postpartum hemorrhage. Those are the same drugs most hospitals use.

I've introduced myself elsewhere, but to sum up, we're expecting our first, I'm an aspiring midwife, so we're planning a home probably water birth, and couldn't be more thrilled. I'm 24 days post-O today - that makes my bean, what, 3mm long?

Boy or girl, I don't care, I'm with Beth on knowing sex and gender aren't really the same thing, and aren't exactly binary, so I really don't care. When I hang out with girl children, I see myself having a girl, when I hang out with boy children, I see myself having a boy, and when I watch shows on Discovery about intersexed children, I see myself having an intersexed child, and every time I'm totally happy at the thought. We're not planning ultrasound, so it'll be a surprise at birth. (My friend, who went in for the sexing ultrasound two weeks early: "You mean you're not going to find out what it is?" me: "Um... It's a baby.")

I haven't really had any nausea yet (but I was already on high B6, staying hydrated and eating every 2-3 hours), which is good, 'cause I'm in Indiana (I live in Portland, OR) right now, finishing packing up all our stuff. Actually, the mover is due in 1.5 hours... And I'm flying on two planes tomorrow, so I'm really really hoping the nausea will hold off for at least a couple days more. My breasts are wonderfully sore, though! And I have to pee more than usual.

OOooo, maybe I lied about the nausea. Definitely need to go eat breakfast now.

[melanie83103]

Thanks for the info, Beth and Arwyn. I'll ask my midwife..... gosh I hope I don't hemmorage again.... I was totally wiped out from lack of blood! Plus it scared the pants of my hubby...

[Yo Becca]

For all of us planning to not find out gender: prepare for the 3rd degree from random strangers. Preg the first time, I expected my family to ask "why don't you want to know" - and they loved me and the baby, so I knew they would be curious and would want to start buying me excessively gendered items, which I didn't want. It was annoying, but at least came from a place of love. I did NOT expect strangers, co-=workers and people who had no stake in the matter getting nearly hostile b/c I couldn't stamp "blue" or "pink" on my belly.

My routine: "what are you having?!?!" "A BABY!! Isn't that exciting?" Them: blank stares, or "what kind of baby" - "A HUMAN baby!"

Some people just had to guess or make predictions. They ALL predicted boy and they were ALL wrong. hahaha. It was an amazing moment in my life when CLint had to find his voice through happy tears and whisper "it's a girl" in my ears. It was worth the wait.

[lotusdebi]

So, uh... I totally have pregnancy brain going on! I was having trouble interacting with the electronic interface at the gas station today.

[cinnamonamon]

Originally Posted by lotusdebi

So, uh... I totally have pregnancy brain going on! I was having trouble interacting with the electronic interface at the gas station today.

I drove past my exit going to my moms -- and didn't even notice for 10 minutes...

[cinnamonamon]

I'm not sure if we're going to find out about gender this time. We did the other times (1st time because it was important to dh) and 2nd time because we had to have an ultrasound anyhow, to make sure the placenta wasn't in a bad place wrt the c/s scar. There's a part of my that is pretty sure I'm having a girl this time. That was always my plan if/when we had a 3rd -- and things went according to plan the 1st 2 times...

Melanie -- I hear ya on the being fatigued from blood loss. With my first c/s I apparantly bled a lot (my midwife deciphered the op. notes for me when I was pg w/ #2). No one told me, though. I felt like such a wimp when one of the nurses basically yelled at me & told me I should have been up & around already the next morning...

I'm really feeling this is going to be "it" this time. My dreamed of homebirth/waterbirth... Gentle, natural... I'm back home in MI, so I'll have my mom here, and there are 2 great midwives around so I'm sure I'll be happy w/ one of them.

[Astromom]

The nausea and exhaustion are getting worse every day but I love it because I think it means things are going well, such a mix of emotions. I am trying to get ready for a wedding for my SIL this Sunday (I'm the sole bridesmaid).. I cannot find a dress that's not expensive. I fit in nothing. My waist is like 7 inches bigger than it was a month ago. I am only 6 weeks! It makes no sense. Anyway, I am thinking maybe I'll just make something, somehow between working and taking care of DD and being sick and tired. Yeah, sounds a little too ambitious, but I'm running out of options.

Yo Becca, it's so true about the hostility from others when they wanna know the gender. People were downright mad at me because they didn't know what color to buy. Hey, how about YELLOW? Geez. I have to say though, it's so cool not to know. I desperately wanted a girl, but when she was born, I swear I went 5 minutes without even looking (the midwife had sort of draped a little blanket over her).. I was just so in love with this baby, I had no care about whether we had a boy or girl.

And that's insane about the c-sec rate in China! Oh my GOSH! Good luck with finding something great there! There must be like-minded people there... people pay out-of-pocket for homebirth midwives here since they aren't covered by HMOs, so I hope you can find some homebirth info there too. If not, maybe the birthcenter would be a great option!

cinnamomamon, yikes about that nurse! But so glad you have things in motion for a wonderful peaceful homebirth!

Arwyn, I won't be doing u/s at all this pregnancy either. Good luck with the moving and the plane trip!!

[raversangel]

What kind of birth are you planning? i honestly don't know, we are moving across the US in a week! so my mind has been there most of the time trying to get everything ready!!

If you've had previous pregnancies, did you have an uneventful pregnancy before this? my first two were, third ended in an early m/c (hoping it was b/c of the abnormal ultrasound and not b/c of progesteron (sp?) b/c my doc won't put me on pills or cream until i've had two m/c in a row

ARe you hoping for a girl or a boy? honestly, a boy...i have two boys and i already know the drill, have the dipes and the gear...i would love a girl too, but i would be so broke it isn't funny!!

[Arwyn]

Originally Posted by Astromom

Yo Becca, it's so true about the hostility from others when they wanna know the gender. People were downright mad at me because they didn't know what color to buy. Hey, how about YELLOW?

I hate yellow. But green's good. And I love primary colors on babies, I'm actually just not a fan of pastels in general.

[shalena]

I could hardly sleep last night. I had a squirmy toddler climbing all over me, the dog stealing my covers, and me lying awake hour after hour. And then this morning, I was so asleep it was hard to get out of bed.