Dd (almost 3) wants to wear underwear to bed - not really ready yet

[sweetest]

Dd will be 3 in a few weeks and tonight has declared that she wants to wear underwear to bed - not the pull up she usually wears. Ack. I dont want to discourage her, but on the other hand we cosleep and dh will be : if I agree to let her do it and she has an accident. I stopped using cloth diapers because I was washing one at a time because she only wet that often.

Up until now we have been putting the pull-up on her when we go to bed (around 10) after she is asleep. At least once a week she is wet - although sometimes I think she wakes up and then wets her diaper.

How to I handle this? Our mattress has just the regular cotton cover on it and we know we will be replacing it when dd stops having accidents. But what I am REALLY afraid of is undermining her confidence (but I guess Im doing that by changing her in her sleep already).

And I tried the "night time" underwear thing, too - both cloth trainers and special "nighttime" pull ups - she didnt buy either story She wants her normal underwear.

TIA!!!!

[True Blue]

When DS started wetting only that often I stopped with the diapers I think, and just changed the sheets LOL. We put a waterproof liner under the mattress pad so we don't feel hot from it being there, and just wash everything when he wets. It made me make sure I washed the sheets more often LOL (I hate changing sheets). Would your DD wear her undies OVER the pull-up? Also, we started getting DS out of bed before we went to bed and putting him on the potty to pee. A lot of the time he barely wakes or notices when we do this, but it sure keeps us all a lot drier!

[treemom2]

Here in Japan they make these liners for children's underwear--kind of like menstrual pads for children to use while sleeping--they are actually quite nice. I wonder if you could try to use a pad in your DD's underwear so she can try sleeping without the pull-up?

[goodcents]

Could your dh sleep in another place for a few nights?

If she says she is ready, I would trust her. I would also trust that she is bound to make a "mistake" here and there along her journey. You should encourage your dh to remember this. Especially since wether you switch to panties now or later, an accident or two is bound to happen.

[nichole]

I told my son he can stop wearing diapers for bed when he can stay dry all night. He tries. I think it is fine either way. Definately get a water proof mattress pad if you try this. If he pees, just lay a towel on top of it and deal with it in the am.

Originally Posted by treemom2

Here in Japan they make these liners for children's underwear--kind of like menstrual pads for children to use while sleeping--they are actually quite nice. I wonder if you could try to use a pad in your DD's underwear so she can try sleeping without the pull-up?

[CuckooMamma]

While we do have a waterproof covering over our mattress, I still wasn't fond of stripping the bed in the middle of the night. Our solution was to put a garbage bag (could always be a waterproof liner of some sort) on top of the sheet where dd sleeps and to cover it with two towels. If she wets I throw the towels into the wash and throw out the garbage bag. It has made life so much easier and keeps dd feeling like she's grown up.

[ParisAnne]

This is a hard one to deal with(oh wait, aren't most issues?) There was a time a while back when dd stated she wanted to go naked butt to bed. I think we let her try it once in a while. She wets her pull up about once, sometimes twice a week, though once in a while she'll have a week where she is wetting it more often than not. Because of this we still have her in them. She wet last night. It's not consistant enough in my opinion to let her go w/out.

We have a king size matress on the floor of our family bedroom the three of us sleep in together. I'm not willing to wake up in pee. It's happened quite a number of times when she's gotten herself ready and we didn't know she wasn't wearing a pull up, and I roll over during the night and think, oh it's so warm, then I wake up suddenly realizing it's pee and everyone has to get out of bed, tear the sheets off. It's too much drama for the middle of the night. If dd was sleeping in her own bed, I'd be much more willing to let her wet it. Last night she slept for like 12 hours (didn't get up til 10:30 this morning) and that pull up was soaked. I don't think a pad inside her undies would do the trick, though that is a cool idea.

I think we've just had to explain to her a few times that when she's consistantly dry for a while then she can stop wearing them. She's over 4 1/2now and at the moment she doesn't seem to care that she's still wearing pull ups. We require she pee before going to bed, but she's such a sound sleeper she rarely wakes during the night to pee.

[AngieB]

Would she wear the real underwear over a diaper? My dd did that for a while when she wasn't quite ready to go with.

[FreeRangeMama]

My ds2 insisted on only underware at night even though he was still occasionally peeing at night. He was insisting on it so I just decided to trust him. That was 6 months ago and he has only had one or two accidents. Not even the "wet the whole bed" sort, just the "pee spot in the jammies" kind. I did put a wool blanket over the mattress JIC though.

[nikirj]

A friend of mine had her son wear underwear over his pullups when he was wetting consistently at night but never during the day.

If she really wants to and it is only once a week...can you put her on a pad? We used to put our son on a towel over a fleece baby blankie, and if he peed we'd just remove that and he'd sleep on the regular sheets (he only once ever wet twice in a night).

[sweetest]

Thanks mamas! She did stay dry last night (dh is out of town so I figured Id just deal with it).

I think Ill just go get some kind of pad for the middle of the bed. I didnt think of the pad under the cotton mattress pad :

I tried the underwear over the pull up - she didnt buy that one, either

Also thanks for confirming my first feeling that it is better to clean up a few messes than to undermine her confidence.

[DreamsInDigital]

I changed a lot of sheets for a while when ds first started wearing undies to bed but recently he's been accident-free for over a month! I think when you are so proud and happy when they wake up dry, and patient and understanding when they've had an accident, it helps them potty learn better than if you send the message I don't trust you to stay dry.
Just my opinion and personal experience. I made older ds wear diapers to bed for months after daytime dryness was achieved and it took him longer to achieve nighttime dryness because of it.

[mandib50]

this is exactly how my son started staying dry through the night. he wasn't ready either but he demanded to wear underwear to bed. all the tricks of trying to put a diaper overtop the underwear and whatever else never worked. i just reminded him to pee before bed (only worked if he didn't fall asleep first or i forgot ). there were several accidents ... i just placed towels overtop until the morning when he was in our bed and i also stuck a garbage bag under his sheets when he slept in his own bed (his choice of course).

he hasn't peed the bed now for a very long time ... they learn really fast

[seeking sisters]

DS was 2 1/2, still wearing cloth diapers to bed and wetting them almost everynight. One night he INSISTED that he not wear a diaper. I tried to reason that if he had a dry diaper for a few days then I would be ok with no daiper. He was not having it, and he is not a head strong guy. I finally "gave in" I think we have had a total of about 5 accidents since then and he turned 4 in March.

So, it is possible that your little one just knows that she is ready. Go for it.

[faithnj]

You can take my advice or leave it, but I felt I'd throw it in the pot in case it helped. First, unless your child is a big water drinker, you can stop serving liquids an hour or so before bed time. )Take it or leave it. Only you know if it's appropriate.)

Also-- My girlfriend said she was night potty trained this way:

You take the child to the potty before bed time. Then 3-4 hours later, you wake up and put the sleeping child over a potty (preferably at the side of your bed) and whisper to them to go potty, pee pee, whatever. They will do this practically in their sleep. By morning time, you will probably have a dry child! After a long period (perhaps even a year) of being kept dry at night-- you tell her that you've been taking her to the potty for a while. Now she will have to handle it on her own. Once she wakes up wet a few times, she'll start holding her urine, or going to the bathroom on her own to maintain her customary dryness.

IF you object to that for some reason, you can also wake the child up and take them to the bathroom. This will start a habit of going to the bathroom for him or herself at night, and also help the child to stay dry.

Hope one of these suggestions may be of help. Personally, I've been doing the "dream pottying" with my DD who's 19 months, and she wakes up dry.

Faith

[siouxm]

dd made a firm announcement right before her 3rd birthday that she would only sleep in panties at night. I was very tense and tried to talk her out of it, but she stood her ground and I gave in. Since then she has only had maybe 2 accidents... maybe. I know there was one, when she had drank way too much milk right before bed and fell straight to sleep. But other than that, the girl seems to have a steel trap bladder.

She made her choice and somehow that was all it took for her to be night-time trained.

[sweetest]

I wish I could say that its going well, but we have had to change the sheets almost every morning

But we have had some major routine changes, too. I started a new job two weeks ago and that was when the wetting really started. Plus dd now wants to sleep in her own bed - which I have mixed feelings about. She is just getting so big so quick.

[Shenjall]

Do you sew? Or someone you know? I'm thinking maybe a blanket/towel with some waterproof backing for her to sleep on. A special sleeping blankie, if you will.
If she does have an accident, then you're only changing her jammies and the towel, and not the sheets. Just a thought.....



I see you posted while I was taking my sweet time replying....

I'm sorry things arent going well. It IS hard when they grow up.

Will she go back to the cloth? Dd was in a cloth at nite and if it was wet, we just washed it with the rest of our laundry without any problem.....

[John&Timmy'sMom]

Lots of folks are suggesting the underwear over a pullup, I am in the same boat with my two boys and I am wondering if maybe the pullup over the underwear might be more convincing. That way, they can still feel themselves wetting, but it doesn't mess the whole bed up...???