Are You Having Any More???

[doulanichole]

I am certain I have been asked this by every person I have seen or heard from since the birth of my baby. Is anyone else hearing this or is it just me? I don't remember anyone ever asking before, why now? Is it because I have a 4 children now? And like I would even be able to answer that question at this point. Just seems like an odd thing to ask someone so newly postpartum. And I truly don't know the answer, although dh would like to respond with a resounding NO.

[BelgianSheepDog]

I think everyone is assuming I'll have more since this is my first. Lots of "oh and you can use that for the next one, too" kind of comments. Not something that's on my radar right now though, really.

[grace's voice]

Well, dh originally wanted 6 or 7, then at the end of my pg he was talking vasectomy! Soooo, yeah a few people have asked. This pg was long and unpleasant. I don't ever want to be pg again. Yet, even at the end when I was most miserable I kept catching myself thinking and saying "next time." Am I nuts?!!! : I think so. Benny turned 2 weeks last friday and I suddenly realized he's grown so much since birth... now I need another one!

Seriously though, I don't want more than I can handle and we certainly are not going to have more than we can afford. Sometime down the road, post chiropractic school for dh, we would like to adopt 1 or 2 children, probably hearing impared since they are less likely to get a good home and that is a disability we can fairly easily accommodate.

[MyLittleWonders]

When I've been asked (more often than not by family members : ), I respond with, "As of right now, no ... but I'm not making any decisions for a year." I mean, seriously, let me breathe a little (literally! those last few weeks of extreme big baby inside made breathing a little difficult!), let me *heal*, and let me enjoy my 3 boys now before talking about adding any more to the equation.

[mcimom]

Put this on the list of $hitty comments when (as I had 3 girls) I told people that this one was a boy:

"So are you naming him The End?" oh yeah, haha! that's a good one!

I find people asking these questions just as bad as the morons that ask when you tell them you're pg "Were you trying?"

Is nothing private or personal any more?!?!?

My answer is always that "it's up to God." Oh my - even if you're an athiest try that answer b/c you wouldn't believe how quickly people shut up when you invoke the name of the Almighty when they ask moronic questions...

[SoCaliMommy]

I've been gettin they comments from family mainly: .

Oh i hate the comments from strangers saying oh how perfect now you have a boy and a girl *rolling eyes* they act like i shouldn't have more because i have a son and daughter.

evil mil asked if we were having more and i said i wasn't sure she at one time made a comment to dh about how we shouldn't have more.

[augustmom]

I get asked, too. it's annoying as it is no one's business but ours. I really don't think that I want another. I love my children, but there are other things that I want to do some day like possible get my masters degree or go to photography school. Plus I'm 36 and I feel as though I'm getting "up there" though I know I'm still young. I love my family of 4, but you never know what God has in store for you, kwim?

[eco_mama]

I haven't recieved any comments like that.....yet. After I had dd I got tons. It was soo annoying since I went through 32 1/2 hours of labor w/ her, a question like, "When's the next one coming?" was THE LAST thing I wanted to hear. It's funny cuz my dh used to say he wanted alot of kids but after this one he was like, "Um..lets not have anymore kids.....Your labors are too long!" (Elijahs labor was 17 hours 40 min.) I definitely feel content now that I have a boy and girl but I also find myself missing being pg and thinking that I would definitely do it again! But not for at least 3 yrs....or I guess whenever Jah wills.

[AugustineM]

ITA, everyone has been asking me this. Mostly family members, but more distant ones, like grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. It's funny because I can never tell what they "think" I should say, like are they expecting I'm going to say no? I've also had people (strangers) say, "Oh how nice, now you have a boy & a girl and you can be done if you want!" I think that's a weird thing to say... I don't think it's super important to have both sexes, especially...

Anyway, I always just say: MAYBE.

[MyLittleWonders]

Strangers keep asking me if we are hoping to have a girl for #4 ... first of all, who said I'm having a fourth ... and second of all, what is *wrong* with all boys? I in in love with my boys and honestly am quite fine not having a girl (so don't want to deal with all the girl drama!!! ). To me them saying something like that, especially in front of my boys, really irks me. I would never want my boys to think there is something wrong with them that Mommy needs to *try again* for a girl. : Geesh ... what is wrong with people?!

[fireant]

I get asked that but I also get TOLD that I am having more by my ILs. They are convinced that they have control over this. My FIL said he's putting in an order for more.:

[OwensMa]

I haven't been asked yet, I don't think. However, if I am, I'll answer with a very excited: YES!!

[BelgianSheepDog]

Originally Posted by Marlow's mom to be

I get asked that but I also get TOLD that I am having more by my ILs. They are convinced that they have control over this. My FIL said he's putting in an order for more.:

Well if he's going to treat you like a short order kitchen I'd put up a sign that says "we reserve the right to refuse service to anyone."

[Caroline248]

I get a lot of the "Well, I HOPE you are done now" comments, mainly from family. I usually say "Actually, I thought I WAS done after 4, but apparently we suck at planning these things, so who knows!!".

Strangers said that after my fourth, but with number five I get the more "in awe" type statements.

In truth, my DH is planning on getting "snipped". So we are very much done, and I am beyond thrilled.

~C~

[AugustineM]

Originally Posted by Caroline248

I usually say "Actually, I thought I WAS done after 4, but apparently we suck at planning these things, so who knows!!".

Ha ha, that's how I feel. Neither of ours were planned. Loved, of course, but not planned.

[eco_mama]

Marley was planned...Elijah was a surprise.

[Caroline248]

Yeah, when you have five children (7 pregnancies) and only one was "planned"...I think you can't say one way or the other if you are "done".

I was reading the thread about pregnancies AFTER vasectomies...uhoh.....

~C~

[Amys1st]

We are done done done.

We said before the 24 week prgncy that we would think about it after the baby came. Well then the emergency c section and early delivery, nicu stay etc. The odds are it will happen again and we dont want to put both girls thru that again. MY Dr was telling me during my surgery how I always would have to have a section for now on and I thought- dont worry I am now done.
The neonatoligists were surprised we were done since they think we are great parents. I said no looking for repeat customers.

[*guest]

we're done with bio kids. we thought we only wanted one, but after going through a rough birth and having weird feeding issues, we are sure. we'd consider adoption in the future for sure.

oh, i used to use the "it's in god's hands" line when people asked us when we were going to conceive since it took a while and i got really sick of b eing asked. it worked wonders, hehe.

[hlivengo]

I'm with LeighAnne

I always invoke God's name. Of course, now that I have 10 kids, people ASSUME I'm done. You know what happens when you assume...