All children by C-section tribe )_( - Page 5

[marieandchris]

Me Too!

Both my children turned breech at 32 weeks. DS was born at 38 weeks when, instead of a version, they discovered that all my amniotic fluid had disappeared in the previous week. He was a footling breech/stargazer, and BIG, so I had a section. DD was born 3 years later, frank breech, at 41 weeks with all my fluid going missing AGAIN. I was trying for a homebirth with DD, and a birth center birth with DS. With DD, my uterine scar had thinned so badly that the OB had remove part of my uterus and do extensive repair. This OB was my back-up homebirth OB, and is very pro-homebirth. He told me that he felt my uterus would have ruptured quickly because of the thinning he saw.

I am done... I just can't go through another section. Also, I'm 40, and just grateful for the two wonderful kids I have. But I am a little sad that I will never experience childbirth OR labor. I never felt a labor pain... but I have accepted it and moved on.

Marie

[coloradoalice]

Hi there!!

I've been trying to keep up a c-section support thread in Birth and Beyond and now I see that this is where you all are!!!

Both my babies were c-sections. Neither by choice, first a homebirth transfer and the second a vbac attempt that just wasn't going right. My birth stories are

here- http://www.mothering.com/discussions...Grace+Mckenzie

and here- http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=389984

I recently learned from my chiropractor (after having x-rays to answer some nagging questions about the c-sections) that I have a serious tailbone break that is very old and the anatomy inside my pelvis is not normal and makes a very unfavorable passageway for birth. That has helped me come to terms with things a little bit better. But I will still always wonder if that is really the reason things didn't work for me.

We have decided that two is enough. My husband had a vasectomy 3 weeks ago. After the news from the chiropractor sealing the deal that any further children would have to be born by planned c-section, and the fact that I had GD both pregnancies which is a major PITA we decided that if we have anymore children they will join us via adoption.

So that's me! Glad to meet you all!

[egoldber]

Just wanted to introduce myself here. I have had 2 cesareans and am planning my third for November.

My first C-section my water broke at 37 weeks. My DD was not engaged in my pelvis at all and my cervix was totally unripe. The OB attempted induction which failed. I never effaced or dilated at all. The hospital and OB had a 24 hours with ruptured membrane policy = C-section, so thats what we did. At the C-section, the OB said that DD was asynclitic, so that certainly didn't help, but I think the biggest factor was the (unexplained) early membrane rupture.

With my second DD I was determined to VBAC and have a natural child birth, but I wanted the "safety" of a hospital birth. I switched OBs three times to find a truly supportive one. I went into spontaneous labor exactly on my due date and labored at home with my doulas until I went to the hospital at 5 cm dilated. I labored for an hour at the hospital and was then complete and started pushing. During the routine montoring, DD's heart rate dropped into the 60s and stayed there. I was rushed for an emergency C-section and she was born 15 minutes later. But it was too late. I had had a uterine rupture and placental abruption, and DD had irreversible, severe hypoxic brain injury. She died 9 days later.

I am now pregnant again. I have yet another OB (although I do still love my last one) and am also seeing a high risk specialist. Barring any further complications, I will be having a planned C-section at 37 weeks, after an amnio at 36 1/2 weeks to check for lung maturity.

I'll never have a vaginal birth, and at this point I couldn't care less. All I want is a live baby in my arms again.

[mamameg]

egoldber... and for Leah. Thanks for sharing your story. I'm so sorry for you and your family. Best wishes for a smooth c-birth in Nov.

[Rockies5]

I glad I stumbled upon this thread...

As a mom of two daughters and a birth teacher I wonder what birth heritage those of you with daughters will pass on?

I know my mother, grandmothers, greatgranmothers etc. had babies vaginally. I know our bodies and pelvises work and never even questioned whether I could do it or not. My daughters are 7 years and 6 months, my sisters are 18 and 19, 26 and 32 and HOW we'll have our babies has never been questioned. Is this because of a mood or unspoken understanding? And if so, what is your unspoken mood?

All I know about sections is from books and I'm simply wanting to ask moms who birthed by section (for whatever reason) what they plan to share or have passed on to the young women around them?

[intorainbowz]

Hi,

My DD was born by planned c/s at 34 weeks back in May. She stopped growing, and going into labor could have killed us both, as her placenta was failing, and when they removed it, there was a clot on my side. I was at very high risk for placenta abruption.

Because of this, my high risk pregnancy as well as uterine defects known before and learned during the surgery, I will be having any future babies by planned c/s. I morn that I will never go into labor. I morn that I will never feel a baby emerge from me. I morn that someone will touch them before me. After my experience, I will admit, I am TERRIFIED of labor, and as I know so much of a VBAC is mental, I know that I would mentally fail myself. Why put myself through that, to win some sort of mothering Olympics? Why not acknowledge my fears are very based in the reality that my first pregnancy was? I see no point to that.

My c/s was necessary and saved her life, and maybe mine. I liked the analogy of the wedding versus the marriage.

I rejoice in my healthy baby. I rejoice in my own personal health. I rejoice at my vagina which is ummmm as it was. (I mean, if we have to have c/s there HAS to be something good from it right?)

I am at peace with the c/s. That does not mean that I am emotionally over it, or that I don't grieve over it. I wanted the fairy tale pregnancy and labor, and did not get it. Reality was very hard. Honestly, the scar was the easiest scar to heal from this experience.

I went through a time where I did not feel she was mine. DH saw her emerge from me, and he said she was mine. My OB, whom I trust and feel is very wonderful, also told me that the baby in the Nicu was the one she delivered from me. I am saddened when people call them sOBs, as I credit the wonderful care I got from her with the fact that my baby is alive and well. IUGR can be missed, and without testing and technology, it would have been missed. It saddens me that ALL future pregnancies will be tested and technology based, as I would dread missing this again, and losing a baby.

[mightymoo]

Originally Posted by Rockies5

As a mom of two daughters and a birth teacher I wonder what birth heritage those of you with daughters will pass on?

I know my mother, grandmothers, greatgranmothers etc. had babies vaginally. I know our bodies and pelvises work and never even questioned whether I could do it or not. My daughters are 7 years and 6 months, my sisters are 18 and 19, 26 and 32 and HOW we'll have our babies has never been questioned. Is this because of a mood or unspoken understanding? And if so, what is your unspoken mood?

All I know about sections is from books and I'm simply wanting to ask moms who birthed by section (for whatever reason) what they plan to share or have passed on to the young women around them?

Not to start another debate, but I don't feel this is the appropriate place to ask this. This is the c-sections mamas tribe, where we have come to connect with other mamas who are like us. The intention of the tribe areas is not to have other posters who are curious ask us questions. I realize you tried very hard to word your question diplomatically, but just by having it asked, I feel offended because there is an implication there that we will somehow not teach our children about natural birth. I don't think that means you can't ask it, but I don't think it belongs on the thread for us to find support in each other. If you are interested in the answer to this question, I would recommend you go to the birth boards and ask it.

Thanks!

ETA - if you post it elsewhere, I think it would be fine to post a link here so these mamas who are interested can see it.

[Debstmomy]

Originally Posted by mightymoo

Not to start another debate, but I don't feel this is the appropriate place to ask this. This is the c-sections mamas tribe, where we have come to connect with other mamas who are like us. The intention of the tribe areas is not to have other posters who are curious ask us questions. I realize you tried very hard to word your question diplomatically, but just by having it asked, I feel offended because there is an implication there that we will somehow not teach our children about natural birth. I don't think that means you can't ask it, but I don't think it belongs on the thread for us to find support in each other. If you are interested in the answer to this question, I would recommend you go to the birth boards and ask it.

Thanks!

ETA - if you post it elsewhere, I think it would be fine to post a link here so these mamas who are interested can see it.

Thank you Mighty Moo. You said it much nicer than I wanted too last night. Thanks again.

[coloradoalice]

Originally Posted by Rockies5

As a mom of two daughters and a birth teacher I wonder what birth heritage those of you with daughters will pass on?

I know my mother, grandmothers, greatgranmothers etc. had babies vaginally. I know our bodies and pelvises work and never even questioned whether I could do it or not. My daughters are 7 years and 6 months, my sisters are 18 and 19, 26 and 32 and HOW we'll have our babies has never been questioned. Is this because of a mood or unspoken understanding? And if so, what is your unspoken mood?

All I know about sections is from books and I'm simply wanting to ask moms who birthed by section (for whatever reason) what they plan to share or have passed on to the young women around them?

Have you read the entire thread? Please do and please see who we are and what we are about. This is not a "too posh to push" group of women.

I personally will protray birth as normal and natural to my daughter and I hope that she will be able to have a normal vaginal birth. I would never tell her that a c-section is the easy way out. And I would never tell her she shouldn't have one if the indicators for one are there.

Some people really truly do need surgical birth. Why must we be questioned.

[mightymoo]

Originally Posted by coloradoalice

"too posh to push"

I'd never heard that before. LOL

I was wondering - I should find out soon whether #3 is already on the way or what, but its got me thinking about this upcoming birth. As I've stated earlier, I have never gone into labor naturally - both my babies stuck around to 42+ weeks - I am concerned about taking the next baby too early. Has anyone who planned a scheduled C-section from the begining convinced an OB to let them go to 41 weeks? I really feel that they were meant to be in there longer, they both came out so perfectly healthy and strong. I'm considering flubbing my dates a week, refusing an early 'dating' ultrasound and pushing for a 40 week c/section which will really be 41 weeks. I feel like if I went for the traditional 39 week c-section then my baby would be born 3 weeks too early (for them).

Those who've had planned c/s - what week gestation were you when you had the c/s?

[jfrank411]

Subscribing. I'm glad I found this thread.

Don't have time to type much now, but I've had both my children by c/s. The first was unplanned and the second planned. I'm a little sad that I will never experience a vaginal birth, but feel extremely blessed to have my children, regardless of how they entered the world.

[Debstmomy]

Mighty Moo, I talked with my doc about this. He said it was up to me. That we would work together & decide when the time was right. He does not like going past 40 weeks, but he would with careful monitoring.

good luck...I realize how lucky I am with my OB, he listens. Man, how I wish they all would.

[Leilalu]

Originally Posted by Rockies5

As a mom of two daughters and a birth teacher I wonder what birth heritage those of you with daughters will pass on?

I know my mother, grandmothers, greatgranmothers etc. had babies vaginally. I know our bodies and pelvises work and never even questioned whether I could do it or not. My daughters are 7 years and 6 months, my sisters are 18 and 19, 26 and 32 and HOW we'll have our babies has never been questioned. Is this because of a mood or unspoken understanding? And if so, what is your unspoken mood?

All I know about sections is from books and I'm simply wanting to ask moms who birthed by section (for whatever reason) what they plan to share or have passed on to the young women around them?

Please take another look at he the purpose of this thread, as others have stated. And as for your last question, I will not even touch that insensitivity!:

This is not the place for vaginal elitists to come and bash!

[coloradoalice]

Originally Posted by Debstmomy

Mighty Moo, I talked with my doc about this. He said it was up to me. That we would work together & decide when the time was right. He does not like going past 40 weeks, but he would with careful monitoring.

good luck...I realize how lucky I am with my OB, he listens. Man, how I wish they all would.

I agree that you should be able to negociate more time, maybe agreeing to regular NST's at a certain point. As long as you and the baby look good I would think that leaving baby to "cook" as long as possible is a good idea!

[Cajunmomma]

Can I join this late? I've had 4 CS--the first for failure to progress (I think that there were a multitude of reasons for that, but that discussion might come later), the second because I live in a very small city and there can be a lot of fear in the medical community here (and the baby was very big) and the third and fourth because I couldn't get anyone here that I was able to talk into a VBAC. Actually, with my 4th, I had developed a uterine "rupture", which I think must just have been more of a seperation or rip, and would definitely have been a contraindication for VBAC.

I have never really had any issues with my birth experiences. I ended up with healthy children who have not had any developmental problems, and so I really never even think about it.

I have a cousin who had 5 sections with the old classical incision, so I know I don't rank at the top of the list for most. I am always sorry to learn about people who have had bad experiences with any birth method and limit the number of children that they will have based on that (without judgement, of course. I don't stand in their shoes or carry their burdens for them).

I would wish all of us CS moms peace and healing.

[intorainbowz]

I Pm'd Rockies5. I did not post it because I don't know if it is appropriate to post it here, but I am willing to if it is appropriate. Or I can PM you with it.

It: me when someone comes onto a thread like this with a thread busting post like that, then disappears. I don't want to thread jack, so I won't.

[mata]

[QUOTE=intorainbowz] It: me when someone comes onto a thread like this with a thread busting post like that, then disappears. [QUOTE]

I agree. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt though-perhaps she's busy and will be back later.

In any case, I feel no need to respond to those questions. The implication that mothers who have had cesarean births will pass on flawed perceptions of birth to their daughters is something I simply don't subscribe to.

[intorainbowz]

Thanks.

Honestly, I'm still dealing with her pregnancy and birth, and have no thought of what "Birth Legacy" I'll pass on to her. I'm more worried with the here and now of is she eating, why does she insist on a lazy latch, why are her eyes all gooky, I'm TIRED, you know, mother to a small baby stuff.

I'm really sick of people pittying me because I had a c/s and a preemie. Having a preemie was the toughest thing I have ever done, but I survived, as did DH and DD. Yesterday someone said "poor baby." when she learned how early she was born. I told her is is a lucky baby, as she was delievered early so she could survive. Why do I keep getting pitty, when her birth was wonderful as any could be? I have a great baby. I'm fine, DH is great. Really.

[Leilalu]

Originally Posted by intorainbowz

Thanks.

Honestly, I'm still dealing with her pregnancy and birth, and have no thought of what "Birth Legacy" I'll pass on to her. I'm more worried with the here and now of is she eating, why does she insist on a lazy latch, why are her eyes all gooky, I'm TIRED, you know, mother to a small baby stuff.

I'm really sick of people pittying me because I had a c/s and a preemie. Having a preemie was the toughest thing I have ever done, but I survived, as did DH and DD. Yesterday someone said "poor baby." when she learned how early she was born. I told her is is a lucky baby, as she was delievered early so she could survive. Why do I keep getting pitty, when her birth was wonderful as any could be? I have a great baby. I'm fine, DH is great. Really.

You'll pass on the legacy of BIRTH. As in , she was born when maybe she might not have been?
I think that is enough for any mom.
I think other factors can always play in- such as faith, health, etc...but we can't always control things like that.

Case in point, I just had my second miscarriage in 5 months time Saturday I have 2 beautiful children besides that. Nothing I did or didn't do could've changed it. But I thank God for my babies I have.

Anyway. I am not in the mood for trolls today

[coloradoalice]

Originally Posted by Leilalu

Case in point, I just had my second miscarriage in 5 months time Saturday I have 2 beautiful children besides that. Nothing I did or didn't do could've changed it. But I thank God for my babies I have.

I'm so sorry.