My MIL putting lead wood toy with my DS toys - advice

[Barcino]

My MIL has some toys for my DS at her house as well as some toys for my niece. Well she organized her toy closet and parked next tomy son's toys is a riding horse that her dad made painted with lead paint and chipping on the bottom. THe paint is not acutally chipping by itself but it is dangerous obviously. We asked her already to have it away from our son and yet it is right at his reach and NEXT to his toys. I am at my wits end. He is not going there until we resolve this issue and I am sure it will end up in a fight.

What do I do. I told my DH that he has to go there, test the dang horse, bag it and put it away from the kids where it cannot be accessed. Then I want to personally wipe all of my son's toys there with water and what soap? I am really at my witts end with my MIL.

How woudl you approach it? It should NOT be this hard and she does know that this is a concern to us. We have already asked them to take it away and there it is once again. I dont want my boy to play with his toys there because they are next to that thing. What would you do?


Thanks!

[Spastica]

Lead paint really isn't toxic if you just play with it. If he eats it or is actually DOING the painting it is harmful. If your son is at the age where he doesn't put things in his mouth, it shouldn't be a problem.

[afishwithabike]

Kindly ask her if she'd allow the horse to be refinished (since the paint is chipping). Strip it and paint it with a water based paint and coat it with a laquer or a wax. That way it would look nice be preserved and safe for play. As far as the other toys as many that can be rinsed with hot boiling water and Tea Tree Oil mixed with Lavander DO IT! Make sure it is in an open area where the water running off can be rinsed away. Please make sure you use gloves and a mask when you do this. You don't eant it getting into your nose mouth or eyes either. Lead is soo dangerous and it is nothing to mess around with as you obviously already know.

[mavery]

Do you actually know the paint is lead-based, or do you just suspect because the toy is old? I think your plan of having your dh test it and remove it is perfectly reasonable and can be done in a totally nonconfrontational way. We had some issues with lead paint in my MIL/FIL's house and once they understood where the problem was and why I was concerned, they repainted all the relevant areas before the next time I visited and were totally nice about how they wanted me to feel my ds was safe in their home. You might find they just don't understand the issue....?

[Barcino]

Well I do know they undertand as we have talked about this at lenght before. We had my DS tested because we had a piece of furniture from their house that was lead painted... sent it back, asked them to keep that piece and the horse AWAY from anything that had to do with our son as per pediatrician orders. They have been educated but I guess we gotta go at it again and a bit more firmly. Makes me so mad : I know she will take it as an attack but honestly I cannot care much about that. I lost a baby last year and I am not about to sit this one out when I know there is a potential danger lurking inches away from my son's toys. So either it gets fixed to my liking or we simply dont go or if we go he is not allowed to play which means he will not be able to be there alone without our supervision.

Hopefully it wont get to this and it will be solved well.

Thanks for all the suggestions. Any more tips on cleaning? I might visit the lead group too and ask.

PS. We know the toy has lead - it was painted when my MIL was young and that is some 50+ yrs ago.

[mavery]

The age of the paint doesn't by itself mean it has lead paint (not all paint contained lead). Not that that changes anything. Do they have the attitude "Well, your dh played with it and he's fine..." I got that from my in-laws and it made me really mad. But in our case, just asserting that they needed to fix the problem was enough. It sounds llike you have the right course of action in mind, so I'd just stick to it as gently (but firmly) as poss. Especially if your ds has had a raised lead level in the past.

For cleaning the toys, I would just use warm soapy water (that's what I did). You can always use a swab to check their surfaces afterwards to satisfy yourslef they're lead-free.

[srain]

Originally Posted by Spastica

If your son is at the age where he doesn't put things in his mouth, it shouldn't be a problem.

I agree. While I understand why you are concerned, I think you may be overestimating the real danger here. Are you looking more for advice on dealing with your inconsiderate in-laws, or handling the clean-up? (If the paint is not chipping, you really don't have to do anything with the other toys.)

[kaylee18]

Lead can be absorbed through the skin. It may not be as high a rate as consumption, but it is still a definite hazard. Please don't think that the oral route is the only route for lead exposure.

If the toy was painted with lead paint (test kits will tell you; given its age, this is likely but as pp mentioned, not necessarily the case), and MIL agrees to have it stripped, it should be stripped by a professional. Inhalation of lead dust (as will happen if the paint is chipped or melted off in stripping) is a potent mode of exposure. Nitrile gloves should be used to handle it on the way to be re-finished.

Other toys can be cleaned with water; wear nitrile gloves to do this.

The toy will lose resale value as a collector's item if it is re-finished; but it absolutely should not be played with or allowed to shed dust onto other toys if it is not refinished.