what is up with this?

[embers]

Zion is three. He has always been like this:

Sleeps on the floor. Hates covers. Must be naked.

I can get him to fall asleep on the bed (his or mine) or a couch, etc. But in his sleep he will get up and move to the floor thank-you-very-much. Other times he will get up at night and go lay down on the kitchen floor or on the carpet...

Blankets are a huge no no. He will not sleep with one on. If he is already asleep I have tried sneaking one on him... sometimes it will last for a bit, but if he becomes concious of it and can feel it, he takes it off and actually moves it or him away.

Must be naked. This is not just at night. If we are inside, the clothes are off. FIne with me when we are home.. but it has been fun trying to teach him that pants stay on a wallmart, naked at friend's house scares parents, etc He does not get upset or fighting most of the time - he is all about logic, reason, and communication... but he would be naked 100% of the time if I did not stand my ground on being clothed while out and about. Sometimes we compromize and I let him go without a shirt weather-permitting.

CANNOT SLEEP CLOTHED. We have had screaming fits over jammies when I thought they were needed for warmth (no blanket, remember). He could take all clothes off by 10 months with ease.

I just keep the house really really warm... especially at night. (Though not too warm - the warm started AFTER his behavior, not as a cause... it is not too hot in the house, in other words!) This is no big deal, but we spent the night with a family friend and my son wanted to be naked, and her house was cold at night. I was a wreck trying to accomodate

No shoes. I get it... I am a LOT like him. My feet are so uncomfortable and even in the winter they feel like they are over heating if I wear shoes. He and I are both barefoot almost 100% of the time.

So... guys? Gals? What is up with this?

[Roar]

Personally I'd keep the house at a regular temperature and trust that your son can figure out if he's cold and if so what to do about it. Some people run much hotter or cooler than what is typical for other people and lots of people find it more comfortable to sleep nude. At times when he needs to be clothed I'd be sure to get him cotton stuff and cut out the tags. He might especially like handme downs or preworn clothes that are softer.

[JessJoy]

Do a search in the tribe forum for "sensitive" kids. I had never heard of it until I stumbled upon the thread...wish I could rememeber which forum. ANyhoo, it was a support thread for parents of "sensitive" kids. THese are people who are bothered by certain textures, tastes, anything that seems normal to most people. Sounds like that might be the issue.

[peaceful_mama]

my friend's kids are the same way! BOTH of them. well except maybe the sleeping naked, i don't know about that, but it wouldn't surprise me at all...though i know at least one sleeps with blankets sometimes. She's got the near 4 yr. old wearing a pair of underwear MOST of the time now. (I notice he takes them off when all the babies are going naked, think it's more a 'I wanna too' thing) I know he says he's hot all the time.
I don't know how he is about textures, but I have a few kids in my early childhood classes who don't like to wear certain things or just don't want to quit wearing a favorite thing in the wrong season...

[embers]

Underwear? Yeah... right. Not in your life. Zion wont stand for it. If he has pants on, at least he wants to be nekkid under his pants! He potty trained at 18mos without one accident sense, no wet nights, etc... but underwear is a total refusal too hehe....

Never had a sippy cup either. Can't stand them. Straws come out of drinks, too.

NO hats, but sun glasses are cool : I don't get it, I just go with it!

[eilonwy]

Wow, this sounds very similar to my BooBah. BooBah, unlike her brother, did not sleep for long stretches at night until she was fully two months old. What changed? Well, she learned to army crawl, so she could get out of the blankets. Once I stopped trying to keep her covered at night, she slept beautifully for 5-8 hours at a time. Every night we put a diaper on her and every night she wakes at some point (usually because she has to pee) and takes it off; I don't even bother with pajamas most days. She hates wearing clothing and her shoes, but she does keep her clothing on in stores (most of the time).

The thing is, I know why she does these things! I can relate, I felt exactly the same way when I was her age. It's SID/hyperawareness. Clothing feels funny. BooBah's shoes feel especially funny (she's got very, very wide feet, and apparently girls aren't supposed to have extra wide feet becuase they don't make shoes like that : ) to her, so of course she takes them off every chance she gets. Dresses touch her body at random points (not to mention making it difficult to go to the bathroom becuase she has to hold them up) and times, and the tags are unbearable.

I've found that if I put her in her brother's hand-me-down undershirts, which are tagless, she'll keep the same shirt on all day. If I let her put a (plain) shirt on inside out and/or backwards, she will likewise wear it. I dont' want to cut all of the tags out of her clothing becuase I hope to sell a lot of it later on, but I know that it's the tags and seams driving her bonkers. Oh, and any fabric that's remotely rough or scratchy drives her *insane*. This is a *HUGE* problem for us right now, because our dryer isn't working; everything is line dryed, therefore *everything* is itchy and BooBah spends most of her days naked or wearing the clothing that her brother wore the day before (the itchiness factor already having been worn out by his frenetic activity).

Solutions: There's nothing wrong with sleeping naked, is there? Is he uncomfortably cold? (BooBah has inherited her father's metabolism, and doesn't seem to get cold, ever.) If you can afford it, buy tagless clothing and/or remove the tags from your son's clothing. I'm going to try covering seams with smooth, satiny ribbon for BooBah in the near future; I'll let you know how that works out. And if the clothing is super cheap and/or super itchy, forget it. It's probably not worth the struggle to keep him dressed.

Underpants-wise, lots of people recommend Hannas, and that's great if you can afford them. I have a niece with Asperger's and *severe* sensory issues, and she wears Hanes Boys' Boxer Briefs, which can be found for less money than Hannas and are comfortable for her (we can tell, because she doesn't remove them the moment she walks in the door). I'm going to try to find some teensy ones for BooBah pretty soon, because she loathes the cute, girly underpants that she has and Hannas don't even come small enough for her.

[embers]

(we can tell, because she doesn't remove them the moment she walks in the door).

Wow. That is Zion. The SECOND we walk through a door, clothes come off. At home it is fine (he FREAKS if he cannot get pants and shirt of quick enough) - but out and about has been a challange. I am in a 12 step recovery and attend meetings, and Zion has more than once walked up to me naked at least waste down if not completely... Clothes come off, it just is the way that he feels.

Shoes? He wears them maybe once a week. This is the biggest issue I see with him starting preschool. I may be able to encourage him to keep his PANTS on, but shoes? I hope... I can explain it, but the shoes are still going to be a challange. I am considering getting him some moccasins that he can wear only while at school, and see if that helps the transition any.

No problems with him sleeping naked at all, or being naked at home. I try to encourage him to wear shorts when company comes over, but that only lasts until he walks into a new room or tries to sit and do something, etc. People just have to deal - it is his house and he can be naked. I do not invite over anyone that I would not already be comfortable around my child in his natural state, anyway.

[milkymama06]

[QUOTE=embers]Underwear? Yeah... right. Not in your life. Zion wont stand for it. If he has pants on, at least he wants to be nekkid under his pants! He potty trained at 18mos without one accident sense, no wet nights, etc... but underwear is a total refusal too hehe....
QUOTE]

My dd is very similar. She loves her panties, but won't wear the darn things. I spent so much money when we potty trained her on cute panties from Gymboree, BabyGap, etc. and they never stay on for more than 20 minutes! She's my little nudist. I don't mind though, she'll just grow to be very confortable with her body. That's what I tell myself anyway. LOL

[Roar]

If you haven't already tried it - try washing the underwear and socks many times and then wearing them inside out. And, let me add a ditto for the hanes boxer briefs. Very soft fabric and the elastic is covered.

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by embers

Wow. That is Zion. The SECOND we walk through a door, clothes come off. At home it is fine (he FREAKS if he cannot get pants and shirt of quick enough) - but out and about has been a challange. I am in a 12 step recovery and attend meetings, and Zion has more than once walked up to me naked at least waste down if not completely... Clothes come off, it just is the way that he feels.

Shoes? He wears them maybe once a week. This is the biggest issue I see with him starting preschool. I may be able to encourage him to keep his PANTS on, but shoes? I hope... I can explain it, but the shoes are still going to be a challange. I am considering getting him some moccasins that he can wear only while at school, and see if that helps the transition any.

Does he tell you what's going on? I mean simple things like cutting out tags might make life so much easier for all of you...

[LynnS6]

Try reading the "Out of Sync Child" and see if anything there resonates with you -- our son has mild SID (sensory integration dysfunction) and could not stand to be UNdressed. This is the child who would tantrum if we took his socks off!!

Occupational Therapy has helped tremendously - he's just much more comfortable in his skin. He's gone from wearing sweatpants and long-sleeved shirts even in the hottest weather to running naked around the neighborhood (I never thought I'd have to have the 'you need to at least put a swimsuit on because you're making the neighbor girls uncomfortable' talk with him!) He still insists on sleeping in HEAVY PJs with a ton of blankets. Maybe we could combine kids and get a happy medium?

Any how, I would read up a bit on sensory processing/sensory integration. Just something to think about...

[embers]

Originally Posted by eilonwy

Does he tell you what's going on? I mean simple things like cutting out tags might make life so much easier for all of you...

Hand me downs, well worn, with large head holes (he tells me he does not like how it feels going over his face, and that is why he panics if he cannot get it off again fast enough) that are short sleeve work the best for shirts. Pants have to be baggy and no sweat pants. Shoes can just go to hell for all he cares. I'm okay with all of this... He can wear sunglasses night or day, and sometimes even sleeps in them. Cool thing kiddo... happy to accomodate!

He has done better and better about not minding them on in public, or not instantly starting to strip when we go into other people's homes... but still at home, I have not yet crossed the threshold of the front door and he has his short off and is shakin his leg out of his pants!

[alegna]

Ask the school, some preschools are okay with kids not wearing shoes in the classroom.

-Angela

[faithnj]

I don't have any constructive advice, but this reminds me of the book "Kitchen" by Banana Yoshimoto. If I remember correctly, the main character went through some trauma, and started sleeping on the floor in the kitchen. Good book.

Faith

[meemee]

it is amazing how kids do in a different setting like ps. the only way i got socks on my dd when she was 1 was to get her tights. once she figured out how to take clothes off i have never been able to keep them on her. and that is fine with me. thankfully she understands reasoning and accepts some people are ok with naked kids and some arent. with the ones who arent she doesnt want to stay there v. long. i cant remember when she has been anything but naked at home. i dont think i have ever bought her nightwear since she was a baby. never worn one. same thing with shoes.

BUT when seh started ps seh just went along with the rules. never tried once to take her clothes off. but she couldnt wait to get home to take it ALL off. that is one major thing i have noticed with her. if she wants something she will tolerate whatever her ablitiy to tolerate is.

my dd is almost 4 and her reason is 'i am more comfortable being naked. i dont like the feel of ANYTHING being on me.' she never, ever tolerated swaddling. she would kick them off - even at the hospital. the nurse was surprised how easily she got out of the cocoon.

[water]

Both of my kids are naked right now as usual, have never touched covers, and will only sleep naked unless it's freezing!

[trinity6232000]

Originally Posted by LynnS6

This is the child who would tantrum if we took his socks off!!

I can not remember a day or moment that my dd hasn't had socks on, except when in a bath. They HAVE to be the Old Navy socks. I have to be the one who puts on, because I have mastered the proper alinement for her to be comfortable. If the sock slips to the side, or isn't "the right way" she will panic and cry.
It was hard for me to figure it out because she didn't have many other sensory issues. I am embarrassed to say that I had a hard time believing that it wasn't a control issue. Until I stubbled onto a thread here at Mothering.

Since that thread I found other things that dd has issues with. Like 3/4 length sleeves. She will pull on them and cry. She seems not to understand temperature and why we don't wear long sleeved t's with a fleece jacket on top in the summer time. Usually we compromise on issues like that. Asking her if we can loose the fleece and she can wear the tee.

Has anybody else with a child with sensory issues noticed they don't mind not dressing for temperature? My dd will wear heavy pj's in summer, and just underwear in the winter. Not all the time. I let her choose what will be most comfortable each night. But her choices are odd at times.

[Roar]

Originally Posted by eilonwy

I've found that if I put her in her brother's hand-me-down undershirts, which are tagless, she'll keep the same shirt on all day. If I let her put a (plain) shirt on inside out and/or backwards, she will likewise wear it. I dont' want to cut all of the tags out of her clothing becuase I hope to sell a lot of it later on, but I know that it's the tags and seams driving her bonkers. Oh, and any fabric that's remotely rough or scratchy drives her *insane*. This is a *HUGE* problem for us right now, because our dryer isn't working; everything is line dryed, therefore *everything* is itchy and BooBah spends most of her days naked or wearing the clothing that her brother wore the day before (the itchiness factor already having been worn out by his frenetic activity).

Good for you for letting your daughter wear different clothes and trying to cover up seams, etc.If you haven't started taking out the tags I would urge you to do so and accept the resale loss. It is hard to understand if you don't have sensory problems, but I could no more wear a shirt with tags than I could wear one with sandpaper or tacks. It is really too much to bear.

Oh and as I type this...I'm wearing a Lands End PJ shirt with the tags removed - worn inside out so the seams don't bug me. Some of us don't outgrow it.

[eilonwy]

Janna-- My niece is very similar with temperatures. She doesn't have a problem wearing summer clothing or winter clothing, but she doesn't like the transition from one to the other, nor does she think to change her clothing on her own. This is a real problem in the spring, for example, when it might be 40 degrees in the morning (jacket weather) and 60 degrees in the afternoon when she gets home from school. All through March and April, she would be sent to school in long sleeves, tights under her jumper and with a sweater and/or jacket... and she'd come home wearing exactly the same things. When asked if she was hot, she'd say, "Yes, I'm hot," but it would never occur to her to take her sweater off and carry her jacket. In the wintertime, she might go outside in shorts and short-sleeved pajamas and not notice that she's cold, or care about it at all until you ask her.

She wears everything in outfits-- god help you if you offer her a shirt and shorts/pants/skirt that were purchased individually. It's like, my sister will put an outfit together for her, and she has to wear it like that no matter what; this is one more reason that it's difficult for her to just take her sweater off if she gets warm-- the outfit will be different from the one that was on the hanger that morning, and that upsets her. If seasonally-appropriate clothing is in her drawers and hanging in her closet, that's what she'll wear; again, it's very difficult for her during the transitional seasons, because the weather changes so drastically from one hour to the next (at least it does around here).

I must say, though, that her SID is *severe* and secondary to Asperger's.

Roar-- I too am big on cutting tags out of my own clothing. I'm just having a hard time with BooBah on this right now. It's amazing, though, many, many brands are now going "tagless." I bought some really soft, stretchy tank tops on clearance at J.C. Penney's last night, and BooBah *loves* them. (BeanBean, too, but that's a whole different story. )