Are breasts sexual or have we just sexualized them? - Page 3

[Ruthla]

I think a big difference between vaginas and breasts is that you give birth to a child ONCE and then (usually) don't have sexual intercourse for a while afterwards. Breasts are used for feeding that baby many times a day.

There's a chronological distance between the use of the vagina for reproduction and using it for sex. That distance doesn't exist for breasts.

[GooeyRN]

Originally Posted by little_monkeys

I do not concider my breasts an erogenous zone. I mean, I have just never felt good when someone messes with my boobs, it actually kind of bugs me.

I always hated my breasts messed with, too. Just leave them alone! They are for feeding my baby, nothing more.

[Nisupulla]

Originally Posted by laneylue

I really am just curious as to whether or not biologically breasts are even sexual at all or if we are just conditioned to believe that they are and that's why they "feel" sexual to us.

We've been conditioned. According to the anthropologist, Dr. Katherine Dettwyler, of Texas A&M, in most cultures, breasts are defined as objects to feed children. “Only 13 out of 190 cultures said breasts were sexually attractive.”

http://www.baylor.edu/lariat/news.ph...ry&story=11854

[Party*of*5]

Wow, that article was really choppy, I'd love to read some in depth on this, it's intriguing!

[~PurityLake~]

Originally Posted by forthebest

I think there is a difference between sexual and sensual and didn't some poor woman get locked up because she 'admitted',to a mw I think, she had sensual feelings when breastfeeding? How completely ridiculous to portray this as abuse and yet let real abusers carry on unhindered. Absolutely pathetic. At times when bf my first dd I had some lovely sensual feelings probably because having your nipples sucked contracts your uterus,I guess I better be careful in case some uptight person thinks I am abusing my child, thats how f****d up people in this world are. Just totally unconnected with sensuality and obsessed with sex. Breasts can be for pleasure and breasts fill up with milk to feed babies, maybe women have been conditioned to feel bad if when bfing they feel anything else than a dutiful milk-dispenser feeling and thereby lose the sensuality of their breasts. Babies adore breasts on all sorts of levels, it's just more reasons to make women feel 'bad' about their bodies. Enjoy your breasts!! All that porn rubbish we are bombarded with daily does nothing to liberate our minds or our bodies in fact the more we see the more restrictive we become, there is nothing sensual in porn, it's just product. My breasts are not a product whether I'm bfing or otherwise.

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[arlecchina]

Originally Posted by MamaInTheBoonies

I think you will find that most men are taught not to feel the stimulation. Also, in most intact men, they do get extremely excited when their nipples are stimulated.

my partner likes it...as do I...so I think breasts are sexual in the manner that whole bodies are...nothing bad. nothing wrong with seeing a butt or a boob, they're just body parts

[laneylue]

This part of the article is interesting. I'll have to pay better attention to the commercials to see:

"According to Dettwyler, the media sculpts American's sexual view of the breasts. Pictures of women breastfeeding ironically advertise formulas or bottles.

The advertisements are meant to twist the image of breastfeeding to sell a product, Dettwyler said.

'They are trying to give a subtle message that breastfeeding is illegitimate,' she said. 'It's lower class somehow.'"

[kat85]

Originally Posted by arlecchina

my partner likes it...as do I...so I think breasts are sexual in the manner that whole bodies are...nothing bad. nothing wrong with seeing a butt or a boob, they're just body parts

.....And some male do like to be kiss on the chest, too.

[Meli65]

Something that interests me on this subject is to look at (Western) art back through the ages -- female breasts have been sexualized, (that is, viewed as sexually enticing objects) for a long, long time, even when breastfeeding was, of course, the norm.

I think that there is a duality there that people long ago were more comfortable with -- that breasts were both sexy and useful.

[Pookietooth]

Breastfeeding was the norm for the lower classes, but the people who bought the art, rich people, for the most part, did not breastfeed their own children -- they hired wet nurses to do it for them. Breastfeeding has been a 'lower class' thing for a long time. One of the things that made formula popular was middle class women's inability to afford wet nurses, yet the desire to seem like rich women, and not be nursing.

[Meli65]

Yes, that's true -- my point is just that it was not uncommon to see breasts being used for breast-feeding in those days, certainly more visible than it is today (at least where I live).

[mommy2zander]

I think breasts have been sexualized by Western Society! I think breasts are made for feeding babies! Reading that Tribal woman don't find them sexual reinforces my thoughts on that!

[Greenie]

I used to not like my breasts to be stimulated. I have an abuse history that has really warped the way my body appears to me. BFing has helped me to be more confident and fulfilled with my body and how I feel about it.

Now I enjoy my DH to stimulate them (gently!) and he loves his nipples stimulated too.

I think that the skin is the biggest erogenous organ that there is, and to deny yourself the pleasure is closed minded and a little sad. Not saying that other cultures are those things, but I just think that with the way things are here, and the sexualization of the breast, enjoy it if you do.

[orangefoot]

I have small breasts - 34AAA and no-one has ever taken any notice of them at all. As a teen I felt odd as no-one in my family is as small as me and neither were any of my friends. Boyfriends alwways ignored them and so did my ex-h. dresses and tops never fitted properly and I found that really irritating too.

Breastfeeding opened a door to acccepting my breasts and really feeling that they were good for something. It changed my view from a sexual one to a nurturing one. I was below par in the sexual stakes but I fed my child for a year and that beat the socks of most other people I knew at the time.

Now I have fed three children and preparing for a fourth I am even more comfortable with them - and strangely as time has gone on they have become outrageously sensual to me. My dh is not fixated on my breasts (or anyone elses) but he pays them attention as part of my whole self and I feel as though feeding has opened some connections between them and other erogenous parts of my body which had previously not been there.

For me the sexual, sensual and nurturing aspects are all facets of the same. As is my body itself.

[elanorh]

Misery loves company .... Well, not really misery. But I must admit I'm one of the women whose sexual attitude in re: breasts has done a 180 in terms of response, and dh is baffled. He is a breast man .... Loves them! And part of that love is the fact that they used to be the "Go!" buttons for me .... A little tweak and I was off to the races. Seriously, could take me to/near orgasm very quickly. Those were the days ....!

I worried a bit about whether I'd be comfortable with dh touching them while bf, and about sexual feelings while bf (since I was so sensitive). And I honestly think I've done a number on myself (paired with the supply issues we had, where for a long time I worried about having letdown during orgasm because I was afraid I'd "waste" some of my precious breastmilk) --- anyway, breast touching just has not been comfortable for me since Ina ws born. We've tried, and every time, it just makes me uncomfortable - especially nipple touching. Let's not even talk about mouths involved!! DH apparently has a good latch from his bf days -- it was eerie and uncomfortable for me. Instant damper. When we worked on me becoming more comfortable with dh touching my breasts - then I'd find myself having similar feelings while Ina nursed and I was NOT comfortable with that (especially early in this second pregnancy).

We bf'd 'til about halfway into this pregnancy, so I haven't had a "break" really from breast/pregnancy/nursing issues ... we were hoping things would improve after a couple months of bf-free but so far, no dice. I'm in the "my breasts are tender!" phase with pregnancy I guess.

I wouldn't trade bf for the world, but I'd love to get rid of my reaction to dh touching my breasts .... He understands, but it's definitely changed things for us sexually and I wish (for both our sakes) that the "go buttons" still worked like they used to. I actually think a counselor might help but how the HECK do you find a counselor who's going to be bf supportive in a CLW sort of way and also counsels on sexual issues?

(Any suggestions from BTDT moms would be great here ).

In terms of the sexuality of breasts in general - I do think that the female form (breasts included) is sexual and has a sexuality to it which attracts men (and women ) -- and like other areas of the body, breasts can be and sometimes are erogenous (ears, ankles, stomachs, necks, mouths). They are, like those other areas, a dual-purpose organ ... our society has obsessed so much about them sexually that some really struggle to see them as dual-purpose, though, and so try to divide the two (meh, maybe me? - I grew up in a bf family though so I don't think breasts were terribly sexualized within my family, although the media impacts things too)..... So, yes, they're sexual. But they're also for feeding babies. Just like legs are sexy, but are also for walking/hauling/running. KWIM?

I just need to work on the sexy part. I'm totally comfortable with the bf part, but with a breast man for a husband, and my own recollections of how NICE it was when my breasts were more responsive sexually -- I'd like to have that, too. Not sure how to get back to that though, except at the end of all bfing for us ... which is years away.

[mike]

there not sexual if you vaued a life a cellabacy.
there not sexual if your prepubecent

[velcromom]

But

Originally Posted by mike

Nothing in and of itself is sexual its all how you look at it and how you imagen it being used

I still really like the analogy that breasts are sexual in the same way mouths are - and we don't worry about whether we should eat or speak in public with the same mouth we may also enjoy using for erotic purposes.

This site has some really great pages on this very topic.

[Thalia the Muse]

Elanor, I've always been very sensitive to and enjoyed stimulation of my breasts, too, and when I was nursing I really didn't like it for a while or want them to be touched. Mostly, they were getting touched SO MUCH by the baby, they were kind of tender and touched-out and I wanted them left alone. A little frustrating for DH, but on the other hand they looked fabulous so he got to enjoy that. :-)

Anyway, after my daughter weaned, things did return to normal and I'm back to enjoying breastplay in bed. Just a little bit of anecdata -- it will come back!

I guess it's pretty obvious that yeah, I think they're sexual in addition to being a great way to feed babies. They're nice to look at, they feel good when they're touched, they're loaded with nerve endings so they offer loads of sensation, and they reinforce my femaleness to my partner and me. And every man I've been with has LOVED having his own nipples touched and licked.

There aren't very many human body parts that AREN'T sexual or potentially sexual, really. Except maybe the nasal septum or something. ;-)

[Wolfmeis]

This article really got me steamed. Clearly the Rabbi thinks breasts are solely to be used as sexual objects. http://www.beliefnet.com/story/194/story_19451_1.html

[Party*of*5]

Well that man is obviously an extremist! It IS possible to BF for two or more years, and have DH watch the baby come out, and still be a sexy woman! I have birthed 3 babies in front of DH and BF and gained weight and a host of other things that maybe both of us wish he hadn't seen, but I can't bend over in his presence without causing his temp to climb . It is totally possible to marry someone mature enough to handle real life. Just because he counsels idiot men doesn't mean all men are idiots. I agree on one point, marriages should be tended to. But why he thinks that can't be done while APing, I've no idea. Someone should smack that man in the back of the head