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Would you travel and leave your children behind?

post #1 of 19
Thread Starter 
Just wondering if anyone would travel O/S and leave their children behind at home (being well looked after of course).

I have an opportunity to travel to the states next year with DH (we're from Australia) but have declined as I dont want to leave my children behind, even though they'll be well looked after by his sister (whom I trust).

If I did go my DS would be 2 and my DD would be 11 months.

Any thoughts?
post #2 of 19
Would you be nursing the 11 month old? I don't think I would go, I would not have left my daughter at 11 months and I have a friend whom I trust completely with my baby. In fact my daughter is 18 months today and I still wouldn't leave her even overnight.

Can you take the kids with you?
post #3 of 19
Thread Starter 
Thats the other dilemma I'd be facing. I want to breastfeed as long as I can and if I left her behind I'd have to ween her off my milk......nope, no, not going to happen.

How difficult is it to travel O/S with two under the age of three on a plane for umpteen hours? Has anyone achieved this?
post #4 of 19
Okay, first I would never wean by 11 months, just way to young in my opinion so I think your instincts are right there.

Two, I have done several long and grueling trips with my daughter alone and it has actually been pretty easy. If you and your husband are traveling together I don't think it would be a problem.
post #5 of 19
I went to Italy for my best friend's wedding when DS was three. We had recently weaned. It was fine, though I missed him horribly, and we probably could have taken him, though it would have been a different trip. He stayed with his grandmother, who dotes on him, and had a good time.
post #6 of 19
Well, I'm going to Portugal the beginning of September and leaving my three-year old with the grandparents (tickets are too expensive right now to afford him as well). But, I will be taking the nursing three-month old with us. Granted, she can sit on my lap, but I decided the guilt of not taking this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to go to Portugal outweighed the guilt of leaving my DS behind with his very loving grandparents. So I'm going!
post #7 of 19
A month before my their 4th birthday I left my sons for 18 days. Granted, they were with their father, but it was one of the hardest things I had ever done. The trip to Vietnam was wonderful though and I got a lot out of it. If I had to do it over I would.
post #8 of 19
I couldn't leave my babes and go overseas! We are going on a cruise and our dd's will be going with us. We have only left dd1 3 times overnight. I have never been away from dd2 for more than an hour!
post #9 of 19
I wouldn't do it, and I'm usually pretty casual about leaving my DD with family. DD regularly goes for a weekend with Grandma, and as young as 10 months old she spent overnights away from me, but to go overseas and halfway around the world seems to me like too much.
post #10 of 19
I wouldn't do it. I have been presented with the opportunity several times including a recent all expenses trip to Ireland! But we don't have family to leave kids with and I don't feel comfortable with both parents being out of the country so I stayed behind. I also missed a trip to Hawaii, Mexico, Caribbean cruise, New Orleans, Las Vegas, but hey, I'm not bitter...right? I'm OK with it...totally...I 'm OK....no animosity towards my husband or anything...
post #11 of 19
If weaning weren't an issue, and you have someone with whom you are comfortable enough to leave them, I certainly would! Traveling alone with the children is not so terrible, and if your partner or someone is with you then it's really no big deal.

Sorry to be morbid, but I do know couples who fly on separate flights if going without the children.
post #12 of 19
I would never leave kids with anyone else at that age, especially the nursing babe.

Travel with them when they are a bit older. This is such a short period in your life, you'll have lots of time to travel in just a few years!!
post #13 of 19
I could never leave mine even my 5yo to go that far away for that long. Even tho I know she would be well cared for they grow to fast to miss that much of it. No way would I wean my ds either bm is just to important for him to loose it for a trip.
post #14 of 19
Since you are nursing, I would say no. Not to mention you'd probably be engorged and in a bit of pain since you aren't nursing for a bit of the trip (unless you were planning to pump, which could be a PITA on a trip like that too )


Having said that, I AM letting my MIL fly with my dd back to her house (we currently live in south florida, and are moving to the northeast in a couple of weeks) We have two cars and my husaband and I both have to drive. We tried to find someone else to drive so that I could fly up too but it didn't happen. DD *hates* long car trips. She's ok going 15 minutes to the store, but any longer than an hour and you are talking major meltdown. DD isn't nursing anymore, as I had to wean her at 13 months so that I could take medicine. I totally trust my MIL with her (she will cosleep, GD, pretty much whatever I ask of her) and I know she will be much better off getting the trip done in a matter of hours on a plane rather than a matter of days in a car. I just think it was the best situation for both of us.

I would probably go if I wasn't nursing AND I knew that the kids would be with someone that I trusted completely (i.e. close family member) but since you are still nursing, I just don't know how that would work out for you without weaning him (and he is a bit too young IMO... I wouldn't have weaned dd at 13 months except that I was going downhill fast without meds to treat an autoimmune disorder )
post #15 of 19
when i went to hong kong a few years back (pre-baby) and while i didnt travel with a young child there were lots of people who were and really it wasn't that bad....

everyone was very understanding of kids walking around, and those planes are usually big and have a deicent room to get up and stretch and have child friendly shows and movies playing....

you can request a bassinet seat for your 11 month old that way you won't have to hold her the whole time and those seats have more leg room so that's an added bonus!

i think it would be a great experience for you and your children and if you want to go then go, and if you can bring your kids along! where in the US would you be going?
post #16 of 19
Thread Starter 
DH wants to visit NY and we both would like to visit San Francisco. He's already been to Dallas and Washington. There's so much to see. I guess we'll review it when the time gets closer, but I'm leaning towards waiting some years before I go anywhere without my kiddies.....like maybe when they're 20 lol.
post #17 of 19
I've flown quite a few long-haul flights alone with my two children (Asia-US-Asia) and it's not as bad as it sounds. The first international flight was when they were 2 months and 20 months. If the trip sounds like it would be good for your family and you can afford it, I would definitely go if I were you.

However ... you might want to think about the reasons for the trip. If your partner is going for work and isn't going to be able to help you much, then it might not be a great idea. A regular vacation is actually quite fun at those ages.
post #18 of 19
San Francisco is a LOT of fun with young children. I've done it twice - once at ages 3/4 and again at ages 5/6. We had an absolute blast checking out all the wonderful parks and museums. I found that having both a sling and a sturdy stroller was easiest for us. There are quite a few hills in SF! LOL
post #19 of 19
I think declining to leave your children behind was probably your gut instinct, and therefore correct.
Eleven months is too young anyway. Especially for both parents to go.
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