public restrooms for boys - Page 2

[laralou]

I just wanted to point out that women's restrooms are not always safe. We had an awful experience in the women's room in Sears. A woman went into the stall next to us as we were coming out and began to masterbate, vocalizing loudly, saying exactly what she was doing to herself. I was trying to talk over her, ds was 3 at the time and didn't understand, but she just kept getting louder to talk over me. Finally, I gave up washing our hands and left. We didn't stay to report her because I was so freaked out. I am all for pleasuring yourself but this was a bathroom filled with women and children. It was obvious that she was doing it for the audience. I was disgusted.
I do let ds go into a male bathroom sometimes but I stand outside the door and carry on a conversation with him. It is embarrassing but too bad. Most of the time he goes in with me or dh.

Lara

[paula_bear]

I am going to disagree with much of what has been said here. I think it is important to talk to our sons about their bodies and how they can protect themselves. Whenever my almost 8 y/o uses the mens room by himself, I am right outside the door. I think it is important to him that he be allowed to use the bathroom by himself at his age. I want to protect him, but I also want him not to be afraid to go to the bathroom. I want to warn him of the possible dangers in the world, but I don't want him to develop phobias or fears unnecessarily. Thirty years ago, a child being molested in a public restroom wouldn't have been discussed, let alone in the news. We hear about everything that happens and I think it makes us unreasonably fearful.

[DebraBaker]

Hey, Paula,

I live in Chester County as well. If you want, email me [e-mail]

I agree with you in a sense and I *do* have my boys (ages 14, 9, 6) go to the bathroom alone. But I must confess I'm *frightned* that something as horrible as a molestation could happen in the *Wendeys* boys' room (we haven't been to *that* Wendeys but we go to the one in Exton and Paoli frequently enough (about six times/year we're not fast food's best customers LOL)

DB

[laralou]

I don't think anyone is wrong or right on this issue. I think we should each do what makes us comfortable and makes our children safe. My ds cannot play outside unless I am watching (I mean at our apartment in the city, not at the house in the country). He may think I am overprotective but he isn't filled with fear over this. I just told him that it is my job to see that he is safe and that if something did happen to him, I couldn't live with myself. If he had a strong personality, I wouldn't worry so much but he is a very obedient child and as many times as I have talked to him about strangers, he would still talk to them if they were adults. I would rather be overprotective and have him be sheltered, than not and deal with the unexpected. Two men attempted to snatch his best friend at our last apartment.

[anythingelse]

[SunflowerMama]

Yes, my boys are 9 1/2 and almost 5 yrs. old. Both of them still go into the women restrooms with me if my dh isn't with us. I agree that there should be family restrooms. Much safer!!

[Luma]

gladtobemama


paula bear: Its true that theres fear transmited by the media, and is difficult to avoid it. We watch tv at nights when ds is asleep, mostly movies or nature shows and just by doing this we get information thats frightening. Even the nature shows are too violent for me sometimes. And news, well I just dont watch them, dh does.
How much of that fear is real? I dont know. I too dont want ds to grow up scared, and I dont want to be scared either.
For me it would be difficult to let him go alone to public restrooms when hes a bit older, that would make me nervous and maybe he would feel it, so I better do what Im going to feel calm with so he feels calm too!