I've cross posted this, because the more I think about it, its a lactivist issue. I'm not so concerned as to whether or not my DD got to nurse, but what kind of a message I was sending her about NIP, and by extension nursing in general, and nursing past infancy.
I'm all for NIP. I've been a pretty immodest NIPer by many people's standards. In fact, just last Oct, DD and I had our picture proudly printed in a local free daily NIPing for the Bfing Challenge - along with DD's age of 3.5 years.
NIPing became less of an issue after the first 2.5 years or so. DD just didn't need or want to NIP much. In her second year, I was a bit uncomfortable NIPing, but decided that A) taking care of DD's needs and B) setting an example for others were more important than my own comfort levels, so I pushed myself, and I'm glad I did.
DD is now almost 4.5. We've been able to naturally wean, as far as I'm concerned (I know that everyone has their own ideas of what this means). She's pretty much weaned now. She maybe asks me every 2 or 3 weeks, and pretty much just puts my nipple in her mouth, rarely ever actively suckling. I've never said to her that we will only nurse at home, although as she gets older, its just evolved into that.
In fact, at a wedding this summer, DD was watching an infant nursling in the row behind us. At the top of her lungs she tells the mother, "I'm not allowed to have mamie in public any more". This really surprised me. There may have been a handful of times when I said I preferred not to, that I was not comfortable, but I've never explicitly said no NIP.
So this past weekend, we were cuddling together on the deck at the local pool, as we were both a bit chilled. DD asked to nurse. I said no. The pool is about THE last place I would ever want to NIP. I certainly did it when she was younger. I remember doing it "over the top" in the water when she was 6 mos. I got a few looks, but not enough to make me stop, and no one said anything. I did it on the deck when she was older, in a tankini from the bottom up. But pools seem to be the place where people get THE most freaked out by NIP. And she's not 6 mos or 12 mos or 18 mos. She's 4 and a half years.
So I said no. "Why not?" Because I'm not comfortable nursing here. Because it will really freak some people out. Yes, for the first time, I actually suggested to my child that this is may not be normal. I don't think I handled it that well. WWYD? I'm confident that DD did not have an intense need to nurse at that moment, it just seemed like it would top off a nice moment with mama for her.
I'm all for NIP. I've been a pretty immodest NIPer by many people's standards. In fact, just last Oct, DD and I had our picture proudly printed in a local free daily NIPing for the Bfing Challenge - along with DD's age of 3.5 years.
NIPing became less of an issue after the first 2.5 years or so. DD just didn't need or want to NIP much. In her second year, I was a bit uncomfortable NIPing, but decided that A) taking care of DD's needs and B) setting an example for others were more important than my own comfort levels, so I pushed myself, and I'm glad I did.
DD is now almost 4.5. We've been able to naturally wean, as far as I'm concerned (I know that everyone has their own ideas of what this means). She's pretty much weaned now. She maybe asks me every 2 or 3 weeks, and pretty much just puts my nipple in her mouth, rarely ever actively suckling. I've never said to her that we will only nurse at home, although as she gets older, its just evolved into that.
In fact, at a wedding this summer, DD was watching an infant nursling in the row behind us. At the top of her lungs she tells the mother, "I'm not allowed to have mamie in public any more". This really surprised me. There may have been a handful of times when I said I preferred not to, that I was not comfortable, but I've never explicitly said no NIP.
So this past weekend, we were cuddling together on the deck at the local pool, as we were both a bit chilled. DD asked to nurse. I said no. The pool is about THE last place I would ever want to NIP. I certainly did it when she was younger. I remember doing it "over the top" in the water when she was 6 mos. I got a few looks, but not enough to make me stop, and no one said anything. I did it on the deck when she was older, in a tankini from the bottom up. But pools seem to be the place where people get THE most freaked out by NIP. And she's not 6 mos or 12 mos or 18 mos. She's 4 and a half years.
So I said no. "Why not?" Because I'm not comfortable nursing here. Because it will really freak some people out. Yes, for the first time, I actually suggested to my child that this is may not be normal. I don't think I handled it that well. WWYD? I'm confident that DD did not have an intense need to nurse at that moment, it just seemed like it would top off a nice moment with mama for her.
