Sudden modesty?

[Scrubsjm]

My nearly 4 year od had suddenly become extremely modest and I'm not sure if this is a natural part of her growing up or if I should be concerned she's picked this attitude up from someone. Our family has always been really comfortable with nudity. There's never any comments like don't come in here I'm changing, and she sees us naked all the time and has never had a problem with that. However recently she has started saying she doesn't like to change in front of others, like in the locker room at the pool or when she is playing dress up with her female friends. We had a long conversation yesterday about how she doesn't like it if her friend comes into the room while she's changing and what she can do to keep it from happening. On one hand I'm pleased that she is aware to some degree that it is not right for any random person to see her naked, but on the other hand I don't want her to get the idea that her body is a shameful thing. Any good tips on how to address this without totally confusing or overwhelming her? She did mention in our convo yesterday that she doesn't mind Mommy, daddy or baby sis seeing her naked nor does she mind seeing us naked, so at least she's comfortable in that area.

[NEWUC'ER]

My 5 yo started this about 6mo ago. I think it is just part of their development. She doesn't mind just Mom & Dad, but doesn't like other people to see her change. It also started out of the blue. I think this is very normal. They are just becoming more aware of their own bodies and that they are private and not for all eyes. I think this is a great, b/c now she knows that others are not supposed to touch her or stare at her body and that is is wrong for someone else to do this. IMO it is normal.

[Scrubsjm]

Thanks, I wanted to make sure it was a normal part of development and not a message she was picking up from someone/something. My biggest problem with her hearing this from someone else is that she could take it to mean her body was shameful which is the message I got from my parents and I really, really don't want my dd's believing that!

[teachma]

I'm waiting for this to happen with 6 year old ds. He's just all about the penis, and thinks nothing of showing me what he can do to/with said appendage at any chance he gets! Still LOVES to be naked whenever possible, and will even go outside to check the mail in his birthday suit. I think it's very typical for children to become modest at some point, and maybe 4ish is the norm, in which case this wouldn't be the first time ds was marching ot his own beat.

[sleepypeanutsmom]

My dd who has just turned 5 has recently started doing this. She likes to pretend she is in a changing room and will go behind our curtains or into her bedroom to change. I think it is just a normal part of development. I think they start to pick up on the fact that people generally like privacy for certain things...changing, going to the bathroom. They see it when there are doors on the dressing rooms in stores or the stalls in public bathrooms. Heck, even home bathrooms have doors. Of course, ours is rarely shut! But when guests come over they shut it or when we are a guest in someone's home we do shut the door.

DD still seems to feel very comfortable with her body despite this occasional behavior. She often is naked in our home and sleeps either naked or just with underwear in our bed. When our close friends come over she and her friends get naked almost immediately...sort of a greeting!

My dd does know there are some places we can't be naked. She has a few grandparents who don't feel comfortable with it so she can go down to underwear at their homes or when they are over. I don't think this is teaching her to shame her body in any way, just giving examples of when and where certain things are appropriate. We don't make a big deal about it. I treat it just like how she can jump on our couch but her one of her grandmas doesn't like her jumping on hers. There are different rules everywhere you go.

Yes, I think it is very age appropriate. I congratulate you on your desire to ensure your dd feels comfortable with her body...very important in our world!

[LavenderMae]

My 5 year old just this week started doing the same thing. If it's just us he is his usual nudist self but if others are around he wants to have shorts on and doesn't want to change in front of them. I'm assuming it's normal because we are very open and natural about nudity. I know my dd did this too but I can't remember what age she was, I'm guessing she was about the same age as ds is now.

[JayGee]

My son is almost 5 and just started the same thing. It's only sometimes though. Othertimes, he's totally naked and doesn't care ! It was actually pretty cute to hear him say, "I'm going potty and closing the door so don't come in!" I think this is the age when they become aware of social norms regarding nudity.