If the uncle won't listen, speak to the wife -- another mother! I thought all mothers knew that killing animals was the first sign of SERIOUS problems that needed to be dealt with immediately. I thought everyone knew that??? I would make sure she knew about the animal killings, the peeing on mom's head and the injury to your own child. I would have to do this b/c if something serious were to happen I would feel super guilty for not informing her. Once I inform a person, it's their responsibility to do with it what they want.
I read this entire thread b/c I have a 4 yr old with aggression issues. He doesn't look smug though, he does not remember!!! I know he will hurt others unprevoked without knowing it hurt them, so I don't let him be around others without my presence. He has a medical disorder with regards to food, which at first I though was the issue and would resolve the issue. It's not, so we're moving on with our pedi to explore other options as the dietary option has been exhausted.
I think the big difference here is 1) I know my child needs help, 2) I do not fear him hurting me, nor has he ever be violent past the point of throwing toys, throwing a royal tantrum,pushing and the like and 3) I work with him and I'm seeking help b/c I see he is totally out of it when he strikes out at others. My own son seems to be leaning more toward an autistic spectrum disorder, which is totally different from the situation the OP describes -- but the point I want to make is the MOTHER IS FAILING HER CHILD!
CPS needs to be called b/c this mother needs a wake-up call. Children that young inflicting pain and suffering on animals to the point of death and then harming other children need certified counceling -- the mother should know this and should act accordingly. She has been told, by you and likely he was kicked out of preschool for behavior.
My sister just married a man with an older child who has serious behavior problems unidentified by the school system or medical professionals, of course dad was in denial. This kids scared me and I don't scare easily. I had to restrain a 10 yr old from beating the crap out of my 4 and 2 yr old when I was left to watch them before I knew what was up with this kid. They don't know what's wrong with him, but she is searching for answers and she will find a solution. That is the big difference again, a mother looking for answers, taking the child to the docs verse flippent dismissal that it's just a boy thing...
I fear someone suing me b/c my mentally disturbed child hurts another kid on the play ground, hence we don't go to the public play ground. My boy doesn't even want to play with other children anyway (which is part of my suspition of Autism) -- so no sad faces okay.
Please do the right thing and call CPS, this little boy needs help that his mother is not able to see he needs -- but everyone who has posted from what I can tell agrees he needs evaluation and help. I don't think I read 1 single post out of 65 that said to leave this issue alone.
And do keep your family away from this child and mother, it isn't worth the risk. Just remember it does not matter what another thinks of you, it only matters what you think of yourself. Your children may not like it, but when they are a bit older they will understand completely and thank you.