or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Parenting › tribe for large families/mamas of many kids?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

tribe for large families/mamas of many kids? - Page 10

post #181 of 419
Anyone do a homebirth with all the kids home?
I have six kids & I do. Mine are born at home, unassisted, with all the kiddos there. The stories they tell afterwards are hysterically funny.
post #182 of 419
Originally Posted by Proud6 View Post
Anyone do a homebirth with all the kids home?
Oh yeah, my last three were home birthed, and it was GREAT, I can't imagine it any other way. They LOVED being there and helping me and seeing the new sibling right away and I LOVE that my kids know what birth is really supopsed to be like, and we didn't have to arrange for them to spend the night somewhere without us (which they wouldn't have been ready for) and I think they felt much more connected to the new baby. After my last birth, I got up and took a shower and then snuggled in bed with all of the kids while we toasted with champagne with our midwives and friends and ate the birthday cake that the kids made for their little brother during my labor.
post #183 of 419
Originally Posted by Proud6 View Post

What was DD 13 reaction and did any of the other children attend?
Sarah was actually very calm about it; she was a soothing presence to have around. She was there when Anna had Anjelica four years ago, and Jayse seven years ago, so, it wasn't quite a novel event to her, although, obviously, it was different in the sense that I really did want her more "involved" than she was last time. While I was laboring in the tub, I just had her in the room with me for a while, talking and visualizing. It was a very special experience for us. She's not a little girl anymore, and I think this also was a sort of transition for us. Of course she's still "my" little girl, but it's hard to think of her that way after seeing how composed and mature she was; even though *I* know that birth is natural, society bombards us with the idea that it isn't, so, to see her embrace it as natural was very rewarding for me.

Delilah (9), was another story altogether. She's always been a bit of a worrier, and she sounded like my mother-in-law! "What if something goes wrong? How do you know it's going to be ok? How quickly can we get to the hospital? What if the baby gets stuck? What if the baby isn't breathing?," etc. We finally very gently told her that if she didn't want to be there, she could go to another room if she wished, which she took us up on it. I think her spirit just wasn't ready to accept this notion, which is funny because Sarah was her age when Anji was born, and Sarah was pretty ok about it. Just different personalities. Of course, we wouldn't force Delilah to stay in the room if she wasn't comfortable; we're hoping that as she sees more homebirths, the concept will become more comfortable to her and, hopefully, she'll be able to embrace it as Sarah has.

All the kids know that they are free to participate as much as they wish. For Delilah, that basically meant staying away and popping in every half hour or so to see what was going on (and, I think, to make sure I wasn't hemorraging or something!), although she did voluntarily come in while the baby was transitioning into this world.
post #184 of 419
I'm another homebirther - but only five of my 7 have been at home. The kids love being involved and all have special jobs to do. I wonder if homebirthing is why we just dont have any issues of sibling jealousy or acting up with a new baby in the house? Any thoughts?
post #185 of 419
Have not had much time lately, but thought I would bump this up and say a quick, Hi!

post #186 of 419

How Do You Schedule Drs Appts Etc

My life is becoming a logistics nightmare lol
when you take your kids to the dentist/dr (if you do) do you schedule them back to back, each of a different day?? i mean its getting to the point where they can just block out a whole 1/2 day for us... how far out do you have to schedule??
I have a wonderful r'ship with our peds office and i love then dearly... the dentist is a totally diff experience... we are ready to have 3 kids going... im ready to find a new dentist...

thoughts ideas HELP ME>.....
post #187 of 419
Originally Posted by 1growingsprout View Post
My life is becoming a logistics nightmare lol
when you take your kids to the dentist/dr (if you do) do you schedule them back to back, each of a different day?? i mean its getting to the point where they can just block out a whole 1/2 day for us... how far out do you have to schedule??
I have a wonderful r'ship with our peds office and i love then dearly... the dentist is a totally diff experience... we are ready to have 3 kids going... im ready to find a new dentist...

thoughts ideas HELP ME>.....
I so hear you on this, and I "only" have four. (I never thought I'd say that! Around here four is considered huge!). Last time I went I had to have three of my kids examined & I had the baby w/me too. Luckily my MIL offered to come & watch the kids in the waiting room while I was in the dentist's room w/whoever was being examined. It was still chaotic, but we got it done.

Now that I have 2 at school & 2 at home, I try to "divide & conquer" whenever I can - I'll take the little ones to their appointments during the school day and the bigger kids to theirs after school when dh can watch the little ones. If I have to bring everyone I try to come up w/some new interesting activity to keep them occupied for a while, like a new sticker book or activity book.

HTH. I'd love to hear how others manage.
post #188 of 419
Both my dr and my dentist will only see 2 at a time. Just this week, I have 3 days of dr appts, to just get 6 of my 10 kids seen. It's a nightmare when they need more than one dental visit, too. Sometimes, I want to pull my hair out! At least we homeschool, so I'm flexible with the time.

I try and schedule the kids' check-ups right around their birthday, so it's easier. But, I have 3 boys with birthdays 5 days apart-June 19, 20, and 23, so that's a hard week there.

Throw in my special needs daughter-with her neurosurgeon, orthopedist, nuerologist, urologist, hospital appts, and I feel that I'm forever at the dr!

Plus, we only have one car...our 12 pass van.
post #189 of 419
can i join - dh and i are trying to decide weather to ttc number 4 at the moment!
post #190 of 419
I am loving this thread, but finding it hard to keep up since it is so long. Would anyone be interested in a weekly or monthly thread in the Parenting forum? (Sorry if this has already been discussed!)
post #191 of 419
Dr apptiontments are crazy here too..with only four I usually try and schedule back to back if possible..I'd rather get two-four appt's done in one shot..since I usually have to bring them all anyway Its always chaotic LOL The only exception is the dentist appt's for Ronny (autistic), with that I have to get someone to watch the others and take him alone. He is sooo afraid of doctors and esp. dentists and since he has alot of work needing to be done its impossible to watch others while trying to get Ronny to stay in the room..much less open his mouth! We've been to a few dentists recently for opinions and we are now waiting for an OR appt. Feel for all the mama's with alot of kids having to go to Dr appt's

post #192 of 419
I prefer to get the dentist out of the way in one shot. Kinda like taking your horrible tasting medicine in one quick gulp! Before we moved we had a great dentist that would take them all in one afternoon. They had a large open room with five or six chairs all together, so I could stand aside and watch as all the children were worked on and be with the one that may need me the most at any given time. I really miss that dentist. I have had a dentist that would only take two at a time, so I usually would make an appointment for two in the morning and two in the afternoon, close together, so we ended up being there the whole time.

I had one doctor once that would only make two appointments for the children at once (about three weeks in advance) and then would not make another appointment for any other children until those two had been seen. Which would make me spreading out our visits over the course of months. Needless to say we did not maintain that one as our doctor.

For a while, I, too had doctors appointments ALL the time, when Gabbie was here. She had five therapists weekly as well as all the other Dr appointments for her and the other children. I was always running from one Dr to the next, it seemed. I am so glad that I don't have to deal with that any more. Now, we only go to the doctor when I deem it necessary. Which is quite infrequent. For most things I can deal with them on my own. Like when my toddler clobbered six year old in the head with a mug and gave him a large gash. I just cleaned him up, closed up the wound and put meds on it. It healed up quite nicely with only a small scar. My SIL, or anyone else that I know for that matter, would have run off to the doctor because of all the blood. Oh, and just to clarify, my mom is a nurse, and I have been "nursing" with her for years, so I am not just neglecting or afraid of drs, I just know what I can deal with and what I can't.

Well, I guess that was a little long winded! I get a bit carried away when it comes to doctors.

Max, I like your idea of a weekly or monthly thread, it would be really good. Anyways, if one is started, count me in!
post #193 of 419
I'ma gonna try to keep up with you!!

Hi I've got 5 and considering another pregnancy or two. We drive a suburban (chevy), and don't go to the dr. I've homebirthed the last three (two were attended, one UC) and the other kids were home (the top 4 that is) for the most recent birth.

For those that birth at home, have lots of kids..where do they go durring the birth?
post #194 of 419
Originally Posted by Rockies5 View Post
For those that birth at home, have lots of kids..where do they go during the birth?
Well, my older children are usually right there in the middle of things!

When #2 was born, #1 was jumping in front of the "baby catcher".
When #3 was born we were in an odd situation, traveling, so #1 & #2 were in the other room.
When #4 was born, #1, #2, & #3 were hanging over the shoulders of the "catcher".
When #5 was born, #1, #2, & #3 were weaseling their way under the arms of the "catcher". #4 was not interested and playing in her room.
When #6 was born, #1 was right beside the "catcher", it was really early and the others were all still asleep.
When #7 was born, #1, #2, #3, #4, & #5 were all squeezing in beside Daddy (hanging off his shoulders, crawling under his arms and leaning over his back) in a tiny 4x6 foot bathroom to be involved. It was the first birth #4 & #5 were at, and they were sure to not miss anything. And it was the sixth birth for #1, the third birth for #2 & #3, and they were not about to miss this one either!

My children have pretty much been there for every one, and I am very glad. They are part of our family, and the bonding process started right from the moment the new member entered the world. If God blesses me with more, I am sure they will all attend. My DH and my children are the only people that I feel comfortable birthing around. And the education that they have learned from being present is just not able to be taught from a book.

My children all know what labor looks like and "feels" like. They are not scared of it. My girls all plan to have home births. My sons plan on their wives having home births. They all see intimacy as a normal thing between a husband and wife, and they all see that that intimacy leads to babies. So it not only reinforces our beliefs of saving yourself for marriage, but it also teaches that intimacy is natural and something that should be enjoyed and be a blessing when you are married.

This is one lesson that I never learned from my parents. I was never given "the talk", I never knew anything about intimacy or babies from my parents. It was a great blessing that I saved myself for my husband, and one that only God can take credit for. I am praying that our example to our children will not leave them with all the questions and fears that I had coming into a marriage. It took me many hard years to figure out so many things, and I would like to prevent as much of that as I can for my children.
post #195 of 419
Checking in
post #196 of 419
hi there, I have 5 kids-- 4 girls and 1 boy.
post #197 of 419
Originally Posted by meowee View Post
hi there, I have 5 kids-- 4 girls and 1 boy.
if you had 4 girls then a boy do you get daft comments about how you can stop trying now? i had 2 ds's then a dd, and when i say i would like more people look at me like i am mad and say 'why you got your girl'
post #198 of 419
Originally Posted by cldistefano View Post
We've got four! I really want five tho. But I had a baby each year, almost..so I'm done for now I think I'm ready to sit back and enjoy these four and let them grow before we have number five.

Dh says he does not want anymore..but won't get it taken care to not have babes anymore. He's sending so many mixed messages to me about it..I just dont know anymore. I feel I am NOT done..and want one more. I'm 26..and just really know I will crave and long for another baby one day. He actually had the nerve to tell me if I had one more it would not be w/ him! wtf? Nice, huh? But told me he didn't want to get the deed done (to him) b/c he might have kids one day w/ someone else if we ever broke up?? double wtf?!? Maybe I should post in another forum.....
wow - just wow

post #199 of 419
I'd love to join

We have 4 and haven't decided if we are done yet.

They are all two years apart, all were due in March but one came the last day of feb so we have a lot of birthdays in a row.

I've had c-sections with all so no homebirths though I would have loved to and I am quite jealous of those who do so.

We drive a mazda mpv, barely big enough now but if we had another I'm not sure we could fit 5 car seats.

we don't go to the ped's unless there is a health concern and luckily it's been years since they've had to be seen but we do need to get the older two into the dentist sometime soon. I imagine I'll have my mom or someone watch the younger two to make it easier.

I just had my 2 week pp check-up yesterday and I couldn't imagine bringing them all with me, luckily my mom stayed with them.

I think I read through most of the thread but was wondering about those with large families who homeschool/unschool. Any advice or suggestions on how to make it work well. I am having a hard time giving my oldest one on one time unless we stay up until 2 am...which we did last night making bar graphs for fun
post #200 of 419
Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife View Post
I am having a hard time giving my oldest one on one time unless we stay up until 2 am...which we did last night making bar graphs for fun
2am? Dh and I do that just so we can get some one on one time!

We don't homeschool but I spent an hour yesterday taking my ds1 through trigonometry and graph problems while doing dinner! Sometimes I do think about hs but we have a school 3 mins walk away and my boys like school. At home we go over stuff which they haven't grasped or want to investigate further, maybe too much though as ds 2 is called jesse.com in his class! If they get stuck they ask him first and if he doesn't know they turn to google

I am a p/t tutor for basic skills with adults and I used to think that teaching my children at home every day would do me in. However I might consider it for my dd who is 4. She feels very 'other' in her kindergarten class mainly because she has spent too long around her smart brothers and can't understand why the other kids find it hard to communicate with her at all when she is a non stop opinion machine : She's not keen on the teachers either because she doesn't like being 'babied' to or directed in activities. I have the feeling that she and school may not get a long but I'm going to wait til September and see what happens.

We have a big-ish gap between our first two and second two children and I think this has affected how dd acts and the way that she relates to others. She is very self assured and thinks its ok to talk to everyone like she does at home - not disrespectful but very direct and to the point. At the moment people find it funny and cute but I don't see it wearing off - she's my grandmother reincarnated Do you see differences in the self-perception of your younger children in larger families or is this just her personality?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Parenting
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Parenting › tribe for large families/mamas of many kids?