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How do you KEEP YOUR COOL when all you wanna do is scream? - Page 5

post #81 of 89
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post #82 of 89
Wow I am so thankful for your thread...my DD is turning 2 and my daily vocabulary is lets not...dont hit..dont push..get off the dog..please eat..lets not pee on the floor. I adore my babe my Dh gets home around 11;00pm from 2 jobs and I am a SAHM but go to school 3times a week...I really eel like I want to stand in the middle of my very small duplex in the middle of my 2 dogs and dear babe and pull All my hair out...well I will remember next time I feelthis way you all may b going through the same....GOOD LUCK AND MUCH LOVE
post #83 of 89
:LOL

Wow, now this is a thread I can relate to ...

Sorry to tell you, spent DS#1's 4th year almost exclusively trying to get him dressed ... and the 5th year is now half-over and am still trying to get him dressed.

And every night go through his nonsense with rolling over DD at lights-out, and DD then proceeds to scream/cry, and he then insists on either (A) trying to push her out of wherever she was laying, or (B) whining that he wants to sleep where she is, or (C) singing in a really really really loud voice ... (yeah, maybe he's done with the family bed, huh?)

Try to on-the-spot meditate; sometimes it works. Then again, sometimes not.

Have (ashamed to admit) occasionally stormed into the bathroom and used a few bathroom-appropriate words in what I hoped was a low voice ...

Remember, mamas, they'll someday be teenagers.

G-d help us.



post #84 of 89
Quote:
Originally posted by saffiyya80
i grew up in a VIOLENT household and after getting married i felt like phew! it's over, i'm outta there, but then after having her i have those days that i scare myself with the thoughts or feelings that come up --it feels like pure rage sometimes and i feel like maybe all that anger i wasnt allowed to express while living with my parents is coming up now in the stressful situations, cuz it needs to come out..
I've been really hitting this issue lately (no pun intended. ). My first response when frustrated is to want to spank...I know it comes from me experiencing this as a child, but I get so sad. I can't imagine a situation worthy of spanking dd and it's there inside me.

I'm finding friends are great...talking about it helps. I'm also going to read Mary Sheedy's book Kids, Parents and Power Struggles. It was recommended on a listserve I'm on. Who's in Control This article is always grounding for me. It reminds me that the power struggles are often what bring me down, so to speak. I'd love to hear other people's coping mechinisms for the same situation...how do you just leave the room? What do you do?

Oh yeah, I also have noticed I have more patience when I take care of myself, get exercise, etc. Right now I have a cold and I am a royal grump. Luckily dd reminds me regularly what's important with those smiles. Isn't it wonderful how our children push all the right buttons to get us clear deep down inside, not just on the surface?ild
post #85 of 89
Who's in Control? The unhappy consequences of being child-centered
Try that, and if it doesn't work, try this

http://www.continuum-concept.org/rea...InControl.html

Also, if you go to the continuum concept network home page, it will giv3e you lots of thought provoking articles...I find myself going ah ha! a lot.

http://www.continuum-concept.org/
post #86 of 89
Thread Starter 
Hi all! I check in on this thread every now and again-especially on days that I need it. This week has been one of those weeks. I'm so happy that this thread is still going... we are not alone. We are all struggling in some way. I wish IRL friends could be so honest...
post #87 of 89
BUMP!

Quote:
i grew up in a VIOLENT household and after getting married i felt like phew! it's over, i'm outta there, but then after having her i have those days that i scare myself with the thoughts or feelings that come up --it feels like pure rage sometimes and i feel like maybe all that anger i wasnt allowed to express while living with my parents is coming up now in the stressful situations, cuz it needs to come out..
This is exactly how I feel right now. I am losing my mind because DH is gone for work this week. Usually on weekends I can relax and have a few minutes for myself. The really scary thing is that he is deploying for 7 months and I wish I got to leave for that long. I feel like a terrible mother.
post #88 of 89
You deserve more than a few minutes y yourself
I am amazed at your strenght. I could not let my Dh go for 6 months. I simply new I was nto capablle of doing it by myself for so long,
ONe of the way to get time to yourself is to form a babysitting co-cop with 2-3 like minded moms. This way you can get 2-3 hours to yourself on the weekend. It will put you in a better state of mind and you will be a bett calmer mom
post #89 of 89
Thread Starter 
Wow! I am amazed and happy that this thread has been resurrected. It just goes to show that we are all struggling along, doing the best we can to parent our children.

I can't believe it's been a year since I wrote this. I think I should have just realized at 14 months that my DS was going to be a challenge for me and also teach me SO much about ME!

Nice to know that you are all out there!
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