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okay, feeling discouraged- can you help me?

post #1 of 11
Thread Starter 
I know this is silly. I know very well I will go into labor. I know I shouldnt feel this way, but I do. I am so discouraged.

I was okay till today. Uncomfortable as hell. Miserable, actually. But still trusting my body and baby. But the midwife checked me today (for the first time this pregnancy- Im over 41 weeks) and I am not effaced or dialated at all. I have been having prodromal labor for weeks now, and I really thought they must be doing something. Now I feel like it is all for nothing. I have this PUPPPS and it is driving me out of my mind! I just dont want to do this anymore.


I am sorry for complaining, but I cant anywhere else without being told I should just go get induced or something.

Im trying to stay positive. I say positive affirmations all the time, but Im not sure I believe them any more.

Sorry Im so gloomy. I feel like Eyeore.

Thanks for listening!
post #2 of 11
Not in your expecting club...

But, you can do it!

With my fourth pregnancy, I wasn't dialating or effacing even the DAY I went into labor. I don't know if this is helpful for you, but there it is!
post #3 of 11
I too am over 41 weeks. I decided not to be checked for that reason. I too am feeling uncomforatble the last two days. We WILL have our babies. If it makes you feel better my midwife told me that I may not be dialated at all and I could go into labour tomorrow or I could be a few cent. dialated for weeks before going into labour. She said it really doesn't tell you much. With my dd I was told I was on .5 cent dialated and it would probably be a week and my water broke the next day so you just don't know what tonight or tomorrow will bring I know how you are feeling though. I am not quite there yet but another couple of days and I will be saying enough is enough. Try and pamper yourself if you can. get dp to give you a massage. If you have anywhere you can go for a swim (i know I feel like a beached whale) it takes the pressure off and may make you feel better for a while. Hang in there it won't be long now.
post #4 of 11
I'm only 40w5d, but I'm getting really frustrated, too. I feel fine, pregnant, but fine, and earlier in the week I had a lot of action -- mucous plug, prodromal labor, etc. But it all kind of died down, and somehow this week has gone by fast, and I'm getting worried about the 42 week deadline for homebirth. I really hate the thought of inducing anywhere without a good reason beyond dates, but then I think giving up homebirth would be worse. I've also hit my limit on people asking me about it, because so many of them get all pushy, like "Why haven't you had this baby yet!!?! Where's that baby?!?" I don't know why they think that's so funny. It isn't when I'm the one starting to feel defective.

I know I'm not, okay, I know I'm not even that late, but I'm with you, it's hard to stay positive.
post #5 of 11
I was 43wks when I had C and 41wks when I had my dd. It sucks. You won't be pg forever though no matter how much it feels that way Feel free to complain as much as you need
post #6 of 11
I am 41 weeks tomorrow and also feeling discouraged. But don't let the fact that your cervix isn't doing much get you down. It is just as discouraging to me that I was 3cm on monday and still haven't gone into labor. Your baby will come on time, perfectly baked and ready. Think of the gentle birth you are giving your baby by letting him/her pick the time that is right. It will all be worth it.

OT - where are you in NC? I am in Chapel Hill!
post #7 of 11
I know what you mean zimmee, my mw checked me on Monday (my due date) and we were disappointed to find that the baby wasn't as far down as we had originally thought.

This waiting game is tough, but it helps to keep hearing people say that it will happen...I think I have this insane fear that the baby just will stay inside and never come out! But I keep telling myself that's crazy...right??

Here's to labor coming SOON!
post #8 of 11
I am starting to worry about the 42 week deadline for homebirth too. Wow how ones mood and outlook can change overnight. lastnight I was so positive and today I just want to stay in bed and cry. I am 41 and 2 today and getting worried. I said I wouldn't take any even natural induction methods but yesterday I took blue and black cohosh as well as homeopathics under the direction of ND and I got nothing....so now I am discouraged and so emotional. I have to go to have a nst tomorrow. I hope all is well and I can give it to the 42 week deadline. I started to think natural induction vs hospital induction made the natural induction not look so bad if it saves my hb but they didn't work anyway. Sorry for being so glum today I too feel like eyore now. Heres hoping for labour for everyone.
post #9 of 11
If it makes you feel any better, I had strong contractions for nearly 3 weeks. After my mw checked me 4 hours into labor I was only 2 cm dilated. About 2 hours later I was holding Louis. So, it really doesn't mean anything that you're not dilated yet.

p.s. I saw my chiropractor on Thurs and she did some accupressure points for me. I don't know if it helped, but I was in labor less than 24 hours later. Good luck.
post #10 of 11
You can do it! Hang in there. Dilation and effacement don't mean a ding dong thing, I was at 6cm for a couple weeks, and 75% effaced, and my baby was still a week "overdue". Remember, Morning Glory!
post #11 of 11
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the encouragement everyone! I really needed it. You really did make me feel better. It is silly, because I know dilation doesnt mean anything at this point, but I couldnt help feeling like all this prodromal labor is for nothing.

Sailmom- I was living in Fayetteville, NC. I moved somewhat recently to Columbus, GA. I guess I forgot to change it in my profile, here. I have a really great friend in Chapel Hill. I miss her soooooo much. She was going to be at this birth, but it is too far of a drive, like 10 hours or so.
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