Originally Posted by abac
Sweetbaby3, ahh the joys of online forums. Let's just hope our children never meet on the playground. Or at least if they do, let's hope they can come to an agreement better and faster than we can, or there might be a lot of snatching and waiting going on.
Sing it sister. My guess is that it would be worked out before we even got to the sand box.
Here's how it would go:
My youngest is playing in the sandbox with his favorite shovel and toy shark.
your child takes beloved shark.
my child stares briefly, gaping.
He most certainly would ask for it back.
He would ask again while your child processes what he's gonna do.
Enter my middle boy and protective older brother: Hey buddy, you wanna give that back?
Your child: No.
Middle son: I think you should reconsider. Or your gonna have to tell me why.
Middle son: takes shark back
Younger son: promptly gives is back to your possibly crying child.
My oldest: is probably making grilled cheese sandwiches for everyone, because thats what she does when there is drama.
What am I doing? quite possibly chatting with you not even realizing whats going on, or reading my book letting things play out.
I would not pry or grab said shark from your child or anyone elses (its my last resort, and has been as my oldest grilled cheese making daughter is 19 and I have been doing this for a while). If things were going along at the speed I think it should go (and like we all mostly agree it should be quick), then I would certainly tell you you need to step in and get the toy.
My child didnt do anything.
His feelings should warrant more than just lip service to him learning to negotiate, and whatever else all the snatchers parents think my child should do including wait and ask, an wait and ask, and on and on. It seems to me that alot of our time is being spent on making the snatcher feel better about giving a toy back. That isnt even his in the first place. Snatching is aggressive.
My child has had a toy snatched from him, and before I could even do anything (or the other mama), he grabbed it right back. He said: Thats not yours!
How is this a problem? How is my child even remotely a bully? I would say he was being pretty proactive