Pregnant First Grade Teacher

[wildmonkeys]

My ds has a lovely teacher for 1rst grade. I have heard she is kind and skilled and thus far my few interactions have confirmed that and he really seems to like her. Good news/bad news....she is having her first baby in December. After they have settled into the routine I want to find out what the school's plan is while she is on maternity leave and wondered if anyone has been in this situation and has ideas about questions to ask?

I am glad that his classroom has an experienced fulltime teaching assistant and that when they break all the first graders into reading/math groups she isn't heading any up...I figure that will create some continuity for him in those areas where they seem to be building on concepts rather than teaching more distinct units (rocks & minerals, space, sea animals, etc.)

BJ
Barney & Ben

[luv my 2 sweeties]

I'm sure different schools have different ways of handling this, but I think most schools have a long-term sub so that the kids will get to know a different teacher. There shouldn't be an ever-changing stream of subs -- that would not be good! My 3rd grade teacher had a baby toward the end of the year and we had the same sub for the rest of the year. One of my best memories from elementary school was the summer picnic that teacher hosted for her class after the baby was born. It made us feel very special that she wanted to see us again and show us her baby!

Do you know how long the teacher's maternity leave will be? She may be back before the school year is over, or she may be out for the rest of the year. It would be nice to find out so you can discuss it with your child. Of course, there's always the possibility that she won't return to work at all, even if she plans to at this point. Hopefully the children in the class will like their sub just as well as their teacher!

[LindaCl]

I lost my own first grade teacher midway through the year after she had a baby. It was awful. The new teacher felt like an intruder, like a pirate : who had captured our beautiful ship and we students were captured and impressed into labor. I can still remember how joyless school felt when my teacher disappeared, even the room itself seemed darker. I think first graders are at an age where they can just bond so tightly to their teachers.

So much of this is really out of yours or anyone's hands, but if I were in your place, I'd want reassurance that her replacement is a familiar figure to the children in the classroom before the current teacher disappears. The students ideally should have a relationship with the new teacher before the current teacher leaves.

[boongirl]

Originally Posted by LindaCl

So much of this is really out of yours or anyone's hands, but if I were in your place, I'd want reassurance that her replacement is a familiar figure to the children in the classroom before the current teacher disappears. The students ideally should have a relationship with the new teacher before the current teacher leaves.

I agree that parents usually are not involved in the process of finding a long term sub for a public school classroom. I worked for 2 years in a district, at 2 schools (part time each) where (and I am not kidding) there were at least 4 teachers at each school pregnant each year. That is a lot of long term subs(16+)! Kids survive. At least most do (Linda obviously has some issues still).

When I was pregnant with my child 4 years ago, I was planning to work until spring break. The principal let me pick my replacement out of the subs I used all year. I asked the principal if I could have the sub come for the whole week before I left and I was denied this due to cost. Instead, she was able to "shadow" me for one day before I left. It was a very, very, very difficult class and she had a very, very, very difficult time with them. But, when I visited the last week of school, they all seemed happy. They told me they liked her a lot.

You most likely have no say in who is chosen, as you would not have a say in any teacher hire, but you could put in a word with the principal that you hope the school has enough money to let the new teacher work side by side with the pregnant teacher for at least a few days in order to get to know the routine. As a sub, the new teacher should be following the routine the classroom teacher sets up and the curriculum she was loosing.

It is hard to loose a teacher mid-year but it is also a part of life. Kids need to learn to be flexible in times like these. It helps, also, if you put in a word with the teacher that you hope she is able to come back with the new baby and visit. It is really hard to think of this situation in any other terms than what is the best for your child. But, the teacher and her child actually take priority in this situation. Her needs and health are the most important thing here. Whatever you do, please do not add to her stress at all. She needs only positive support from everyone.

[Flor]

Originally Posted by LindaCl

I lost my own first grade teacher midway through the year after she had a baby. It was awful. The new teacher felt like an intruder, like a pirate : who had captured our beautiful ship and we students were captured and impressed into labor. I can still remember how joyless school felt when my teacher disappeared, even the room itself seemed darker. I think first graders are at an age where they can just bond so tightly to their teachers.

So much of this is really out of yours or anyone's hands, but if I were in your place, I'd want reassurance that her replacement is a familiar figure to the children in the classroom before the current teacher disappears. The students ideally should have a relationship with the new teacher before the current teacher leaves.

That is true! My first teaching job was 1st grade. They had a sub for 2 weeks before I was hired. I swear, for the rest of the year they were still telling me, "That's NOT how Mrs. C did it!"

I was also prgnant that year. For some reason it seems like the kinder/first grade teachers areound here are always pregnant. Generally, they get a long term sub for the rest of the year.

[Elyra]

My oldest's son pre school teacher only made it part way through the year because she had a baby. What his school did was have a sub come in for a while before she was scheduled to take maternity leave. The sub was great, my son liked her much more than the teacher. She was very good with the class and they all knew her from around the school because she already worked in the office. They transitioned by having the sub take over the "teacher" role and the teacher was just doing other work in the classroom. They also had the teacher's assisant there the whole time and she was a constant. When the teacher left she didn't come back for the rest of the year except to introduce the class to her baby at the end of the year.

It worked out great for my son's class I hope your son does well with the switch.

[BlueIrises]

Originally Posted by boongirl

Kids survive. It is hard to loose a teacher mid-year but it is also a part of life. Kids need to learn to be flexible in times like these. It helps, also, if you put in a word with the teacher that you hope she is able to come back with the new baby and visit. It is really hard to think of this situation in any other terms than what is the best for your child. But, the teacher and her child actually take priority in this situation. Her needs and health are the most important thing here. Whatever you do, please do not add to her stress at all. She needs only positive support from everyone.

It just so happens that I am PG with my first child and I am due in December, however I teach 4th grade. I have been worried all week about meeting my parents when school starts b/c I fear them being angry...but that is just another story...I only mention it b/c as a PG teacher, I know we are nervous about letting down parents by not being here the whole year and we could use a lot of support...we want the best for our child the same way you want the best for your child. And we want the best for your child!

Anyway, my school lets me choose a long term sub to fill in for me. I will select someone who I have used as a sub before so I am familiar with their style and make sure it is compatible with what I have already set up. That person will then shadow me for a week before I leave.

I hope your school is as accomadating and prepared. Schools should really have better plans in place for maternity since it is a field that is dominated by young women of child-bearing age.

I agree with the PP about talking to the principal, then talk to your son and explain how lucky he is b/c he will have 2 teachers and that each teacher will make 1st grade extra special for him.

Have a great night! Best wishes!

[wildmonkeys]

Thanks for the suggestions ladies. I hope to have a chance to talk to both the first grade team leader (there are 5 classes and another teacher heads-up the team) and the administration in about a month or so...

I am certainly not angry - I actually felt bad for how apologetic she seemed about her pregnancy. I think everyone has a right to a joyful pregnancy and intro to motherhood so I have no intention of making this stressful for her. I just would like to talk to both his teacher and the rest of the team about the plan they have in place to make this smooth for all of the kids - I remember preparing for maternity leave as one of the major focuses of my pregnancy....my boss actually said I wrote memos in the place of nesting. I am guessing/hoping one of the things she wants to wrap-up before her baby is born is making sure her class is well-prepared for the transition.

I am sort of worried that ds mentioned she was having a baby and that he wanted to stay home when she did (and school only started Monday!!!) I didn't anticipate having a 6 year old boy who wanted to take Family Medical Leave this year

BJ
Barney & Ben

[mamaofthreecats]

when i was a kid we had a really great music teacher who left because she had a baby. i think that it just depends on how the new teacher is. the new lady just wasn't really that cool, because our old teacher resembeled mary poppins and judy garland on so many levels.

i think a new person should come in and familiarize herself/himself with the students before the old teacher leaves. i don't think i realized how trumatic losing a teacher could be until i read your post!

[Village Mama]

A little bit of a different situation with me. We are doing a distance education homeschooling program. We are assigned a teacher with whom we create lesson plans and such with. This teacher is supposedly wonderful and extremely flexible... allowing people to not follow the provided curriculum at all if they wish. She is also pregnant and will be leaving mid year. I am nervous about it because you never know who will be coming in. I get how you are feeling.

[Heffernhyphen]

Would it be possible for you to move your DC now? In the school where I taught, once the regular classroom teacher left to have a baby, the spot was filled by a longterm sub . . . not what you want. In a few cases, they played musical subs and the poor kids really got jerked around. One kindergarten class ended up as a whole far, far behind the other classes due to just this kind of mess. Consistency is so important to little ones.

[boongirl]

On the other hand, I took a long term sub job once. A teacher had been trying and trying to find a job in her hometown district and finally did. In March. The principal let her go and she picked me to sub. I had a great time and it led to a full time job for me and everyone was happy. I stayed through the school year and did more than I was supposed to because I was trying to hard to impress, so I could get hired the next school year. I know a lot of teachers who have been in that position, of starting out as a long term sub and staying for a long time and then getting a job out of if because they subbed so well.

There are rare occasions where subs revolve in and out. The same thing happens sometimes with teachers. We are human, you know. We do get sick and get in accidents and need time off just like the rest of you. I think parents and kids would all do better in situations like this to remember two things:

1. Your child is not going to be ruined for life by a substitute teacher.
2. It is just one year out of their, hopefully, long educational experience.

[kewb]

This happened to my ds when he was in first grade. I spoke with the teacher at length about it. The teacher had final say on who her replacement was going to be and she spent a full month with the replacement in the classroom. The 2nd half of that month the replacement was in charge and she observed. My ds had a great year.

[Verity]

We will be dealing with the same thing this year with my dd's kindergarten teacher. She is expecting her second baby in December.

I am concerned that the long-term sub will have the right kind of experience. Just about anyone can be a substitute teacher; no teaching certification or experience is required. That is fine for a day or two, but I would hope that a they can find someone with teaching experience, preferably teaching the same age group!

I don't want to cause stress for the teacher, and I am not angry that she is pregnant (well, ok, I'd rather have a teacher who isn't pregnant!), but I definitely will let the principal know my concerns.

[CarrieMF]

How long is she planning on taking off. Some of that will be during the 2-3 week Xmas break the kids would have had. If she only gets 6 weeks off then I don't think the transition will be bad with whatever teacher comes in.

Here they get a full year off and long term subs are teachers who are willing to take on short terms like that.

[Soxfan Mom]

Originally Posted by luv my 2 sweeties

I'm sure different schools have different ways of handling this, but I think most schools have a long-term sub so that the kids will get to know a different teacher. There shouldn't be an ever-changing stream of subs -- that would not be good!

This happened last year with my daughter's kindergarten teacher. It wasn't anything as happy as a pregnancy; the teacher's mother had health problems, so the teacher had to take time off to be with her. Then the mother had Hospice care, and eventually passed away. This began in the Octoberish range and continued until early May. There was a parade of substitutes, most of the long-term type. Some were good, some not so much. However, I think the kids mustered through this much better than the parents. Children are much more go-with-the-flow than us.

[boongirl]

Originally Posted by Verity

but I would hope that a they can find someone with teaching experience, preferably teaching the same age group!

I can guarantee that, even without meeting these people, that their main objective is going to be finding the best sub they can for this class. They will try hard, perhaps even "audition" subs throughout the year in this and other classrooms.

[Verity]

Originally Posted by boongirl

I can guarantee that, even without meeting these people, that their main objective is going to be finding the best sub they can for this class. They will try hard, perhaps even "audition" subs throughout the year in this and other classrooms.

I hope you're right!

[wildmonkeys]

Subs do have to have teaching degrees where I live so I am not that concerned about their actual qualifications just whether or not the administration does their BEST to have somebody there for the longterm.

I don't know if she is planning to take leave and come back or have the rest of the year off --- I know that our county gives them the option of taking the rest of the school year off (though much of it would be without pay) so I sort of hope she does that (for both the kids in her class to just get settled in with a new teacher and because it is always nice for a mama to have extra time with their new baby)

From my perspective, this has less to do with the teacher and more to do with the administration managing her leave.

My ds brought it up again this morning...he said he was going to stay home when she has her baby and he hoped she was only gone for one day. I told him that was unrealistic and asked him to remember how little his brother was when he was born and emphasized that new babies really need their moms to which he said "I really need her too" I then used the great advice given on here "But, you will get to have TWO first grade teachers this year! How great! None of the other first grade classes will get two teachers" to which he said "I don't want a different teacher, I have the best one" sooooo.....I am not going to talk to him about it for awhile. Because he is normally a very flexible kid, I figure he is reacting so strangely since it is the beginning of the school year and he has new classmates, a new room, etc. etc. etc. and he will be much more open to change when he is more comfortable with the routine.

I stopped up at the school for lunch yesterday and she came up to me and was gushing about how helpful he is...that he seems to be easily finishing his work first and likes to help her. If this continues to be a pattern, I might ask her whether she can give him a little "job" during the transition to help the new teacher...

I am also going to see whether there is the option of some overlap with her replacement...again I see that as a $/administration issue and something that would probably be as helpful to her and the teaching assistant as to the students.

I am not comfortable moving him. He likes his teacher & classmates and I don't want to give him (or her) the message that I think there is a problem with her having a baby or have ds think that he should fear change too much. I know this won't ruin him for life or anything and I totally get that teachers are just people...I am just very curious about what I can do/find out. I know that I managed several people when my second child was born and I had to spend a bunch of time reassuring them their worlds wouldn't crash down and one of them was in her 50s

Thanks again everybody!
BJ
Barney & Ben

[Heffernhyphen]

Originally Posted by boongirl

1. Your child is not going to be ruined for life by a substitute teacher.
2. It is just one year out of their, hopefully, long educational experience.

No, ruined for life probably won't be the outcome. But should your child get a bad sub, or a stream of changing subs, s/he will have a bad year. And studies show that a couple years in a row like that and most kids never fully recover academically.