How do I teach a 3 yr old to read?

[sweetpeas]

I know, I know, don't push your kids, and I'm not . . . but my (almost) 3 1/2 yr old is DESPERATE to learn how to read! Problem is, everything I'm finding as far as worksheets & such are writing based & she doesn't quite have the coordination to learn to write yet, and doesn't care about writing, she wants to READ. . . I've started trying to show her how we sound words out (she knows most of her letter sounds, though I am running into a problem of her not recognizing all lower case letters, I know I need to address that before she'll be able to read much), but she's not really getting it. She'll say all the sounds but I'm not seeing the lightbulb go off as I string the sounds together into a word . . . So . . . I'm thinking maybe sight reading is a better approach to try at this age (I certainly don't want to push her into something she's not ready for, but she's BEGGING. She wants to read SO bad! I swear, if I told her that getting rid of her favorite doll (that goes EVERYWHERE with her) would help her learn to read, she'd hand it over w/o a second thought. So I don't want to put her off/discourage her desire either). I've seen people talk about the Bob books, our local library doesn't have them, so I ordered a couple used, from half.com to see what they're like. Is that likely to work? If the typical (to me LOL) learn your sounds, string them together, learn exceptions as you go (I'm still occasionally realizing that some word I've read all my life is actually pronounced some way totally different from what I thought it was) would work, I could do that, but it's just not clicking, so I'm thinking I need to find another approach but everything I'm finding (online & in stores) seems to be the typical phonics approach.
HELP!!!

[sophmama]

If she can use a computer mouse, starfall.com is a favorite in our house. Covers everything they need to know but is kid directed.

[hipumpkins]

My DD is realy into letters right now and we do the sound it out stuff but it isn't quite clicking either. I am not actively trying to teach her to read just following her lead with the letter questions and she often asks how to spell things. She isn't quite as desperate to learn...however do you have any board books from when she was a baby?
My DD likes to "read" to her baby brother from those one word picture books. You know picture of lion and it says, Lion.
I don't know if that will help her reading skills but it may help her think she is reading and buy you some time for the letter sounds to work themselves out.

[Dar]

I think she's too little for a formal reading curriculum, and from what you've said her brain isn't ready for that sort of thing yet. She could probably learn some sight words, though, and she might enjoy that. You could ask her what words she most wants to read or just pick some that seem relevant to her, and then pick three or four and write them on cards for her, maybe with pictures on the back. Talk to her about how to recognize the differences between them... help her notice "her" words in environmental print... and just have fun with it.

Dar

[LeftField]

A couple of thoughts...

When my 4 year old was desperate to read but didn't seem ready, someone gave me some really great advice. They said that learning to read is a long process that begins with recognizing what a book is in infancy all the way up to breaking the code. So, I started presenting it this way to my son. I told him that he was, in fact, learning to read and that it was a long process. He was at a specific point in that process and doing well, I told him. I pointed to the things he knew in the world of reading as proof of this and I told him that I once had to learn how to read too. That seemed to make him happy.

Also, here is something that we recently discovered. Maybe your daughter would like it too. We got a book at the library that came with a CD in a baggie. I assumed it was just an audio book and I know my kids like audio books. But the hardcopy of the book is with it so that the child can "read" along with the audio. When it's time to turn the page, the CD makes a specific sound to cue the child to turn the page. My son begged me to play that CD over and over. He really enjoyed turning the pages along with the audio and that helps with sight word acquisition and other things. I keep meaning to get more of those at the library. They are fun and they are also a confidence-builder.

Finally, my son went through a phase where he enjoyed having labels around the house. It sounds a little odd, but I'd write labels for common household objects and he'd help me stick them up. Then, he'd point and say, "THE door!". He got a kick out of that.

Edited to add one last idea...
I've read my kids some simple picture books and assigned them a word to read. I point out a word (e.g. "kids") and tell them what it says. Then, everytime I come across that word, I point to it and one of the kids "reads" it. It works best, obviously, for books with repetitive simple text. Eric Carle books are an example. The ones we've used like this have been by Bill Barton (?), I think. The themes in his books are cars, construction, space, etc, which is their type of interest. The language is large and simple. They get excited when they help me read by reading their assigned word.

HTH!

[boongirl]

Dar is right on. Unless she is profoundly gifted, she is not ready for abstract concepts. Numbers and letters and other symbology are outside of a 3 year old's capabilities. They do not become able to understand the relationship between the sound and the letter or the amount in their hand and the number until they are closer to 5, 6, or 7. This is one reason Waldorf schools don't even have books in the classroom until 2nd grade. Here are some great professional sources for learning about how young children learn to read.


http://www.nichd.nih.gov/publications/nrp/smallbook.htm

http://www.literacycenter.net/lessonview_en.htm#

http://www.reading.org/

http://www.naeyc.org/ece/critical/literacy.asp

And here are some book ideas for you:

http://sales.naeyc.org/Itemdetail.as...Category=CBook

[moominmamma]

Another voice of agreement with Dar. I have one child who did learn to read (without instruction) beginning at three, but the vast majority of children simply aren't ready. The clue as to whether they're ready is in whether they start putting together the literacy clues they pick up from their environment and straightforward answers to their questions about letters and words.

My 9yo wants to drive a car desperately. I said "You're too young. The law says 16. We'll talk then." If my 3yo was desperate to learn to read and the basic clues she was getting just weren't clicking, I'd just say "You're too young. Your brain will be ready to learn to read when you're older. Lucky you -- you've got a mom and dad who love to read to you!" No big deal.

Some small children are satisfied (or can at least "save face") by learning to recognize by sight a handful of words that are important to them. It gives them a taste and is enough to help slightly demystify reading ... and they're fine with that. You could try helping her learn to recognize her name and "mom" and "dad" and a few other words and see if that keeps her happy.

Miranda

[emiLy]

I think you're right on - if the "sound it out" thing isn't clicking, try a sight reading approach. Google 100 most common words and start there. Then on family names, her own name, pet names. Let her memorize books. It will click.

My daughter can hear the sounds amazingly well - it totally surprised me.

I was a nanny for a 6 year old and she did NOT hear the sounds like that. She just needed to look at words a lot and be read to while following along, with a finger pointing to the word I was saying. Eventually it clicked with her and I wish I had done SO much less "sound it out" kind of stuff with her - she got so frustrated and already hated the idea of trying to learn to read (she had been through kindergarten and had "failed").

[mommy68]

I wouldn't push it. I've known unschoolers and homeschoolers that simply let their children teach themselves to read. If she tries to do it by herself at this age atleast she will have tried. As with many things in h/s'ing most kids can teach themselves when left alone. If she can't do it then she will move on to something else until she does learn to read later. I seriously wouldn't push it, she's much too young.

[**guest**]

i agree with dar as well.

dd is four, and is interested, and it is amazing to watch her figuring it out. her excitement. she's been writing her name, 'ada' for several months, and the other day she told me that another word ending with 'da' (we speak russian), also had the letters 'd' and 'a' at the end. and she kept repeating 'dah', 'd' and 'a'. then she wanted to write that word. she wanted to figure out letters for it, as she does not know all the letters (we are unschooling, so we go by need to know basis ). she wanted me to show the letters with my fingers, and then she tried to figure them out, and she wrote the word. she was very proud.

(ds hit return before i was done ).

dd has recently started 'reading' to herself. she will sit with books and mutter to herself, and turn pages, and she tells me that she is reading. sometimes she asks which word ends the page. sometimes she will pick ds's books and ask me to read them to her, and then she will settle with the book by herself. sometimes she 'reads' long english books with almost no pictures

help her to read the words that she wants to read, what is meaningful for her. i also like the idea of explaining to her that learning to read is a long process, as one else suggested.

[flyingspaghettimama]

OK, don't flame me. I'm generally also in the "don't push!" camp. I agree a formal curriculum would be overkill. But I also hear you on the three year old nagging to read issue. I figured if she asked enough and nagged me, then she was ready. If an adult was pushing her, then not so much.

If you follow a phonemic awareness approach regarding reading (I studied it in for my library science degree) , the ability to link/join sounds together into one whole is a separate step from recognizing different sounds. So this was a game I played, first with basic words. Mostly in the car, when we were both bored:
"I'm going to give you a broken word. Can you put it back together? Base...Ball. Tur...Nip. Mon...ster. Yuck..y." And so on. You can also say it's a sticky, gooey gum word that's all stretched out, and when you say the word you snap it back together. When they're pretty good with that, then do this:

"now I'm going to give you another broken word, but it has just sounds:
/K/ /A/ /T/ /M/A/N " And you would choose words that are easily broken apart like this, making only the individual sounds of the letters, and give longer ones if those are too easy. You can even do digraph phonemes, it's all the same to a kid: /y/U/K. They can give you word connections too. They will usually be potty words.

And from here, the jump is pretty self-explanatory to reading and connecting those letters together via print.

We used (lower-case) fridge magnets as far as sounding out first words.

I do disagree with you, boongirl, that only profoundly gifted 3 year olds learn to read. I highly doubt my daughter is PG according to standard definitions (and you know me, I wouldn't label her as such even if someone else told me to ), and she read at 3, and learned how to do so very quickly. I think a facility with language comes easily to some kids, but no big whoop. And then, at six, they only read Garfield. Oh, that lovable but irascible Odie!

[obiandelismom]

This may sound odd, but my 3yo taught himself to read, and I'm worried sick over it! I recently read a book that is VERY pro-phonics, and it made the case that precocious readers are often at a disadvantage later on, because they learn to read at a time when their brains simply AREN'T able to understand a decoding approach. They sight read almost exclusively, which works well until they hit 2nd or 3rd grade work, in which they have to start decoding more and more. My 3yo is definitely sight reading, and I'm probably driving him crazy with my attempts to retrofit him with some phonics skills, but I can tell that "unsticking" the sounds one from another is something he really can't do.

[oldcrunchymom]

I think LeftField has some excellent practical suggestions. OP, I think that if you do things like that with your child, you will soon know whether she is ready to read or not. I would not bother spending too much money on a formal curriculum just yet.

[annettemarie]

I would say read lots and lots and lots of books with her. A book I love is "Teach a Child to Read with Children's Books". While I personally wouldn't teach a three year old to read, this book is a great balance of phonics and whole language, and is very enjoyable.

[oldcrunchymom]

Originally Posted by obiandelismom

This may sound odd, but my 3yo taught himself to read, and I'm worried sick over it! I recently read a book that is VERY pro-phonics, and it made the case that precocious readers are often at a disadvantage later on, because they learn to read at a time when their brains simply AREN'T able to understand a decoding approach.

I am calling BS on this one. My son learned to read at 2 and he most definitely used a phonetic approach to do so. In fact, he used to write "fake" words (two I remember are TEP and SAB) and sound them out for fun. He is almost 11 now and has never had a problem decoding anything except for girl talk.

Now, perhaps your 3yo is exclusively sight reading, but I don't think it's something you need to worry about unless you were pushing him to acquire the sight words in the first place, which I doubt you were. Most likely, he's acquired his sight words and will begin extrapolating the phonics from that at a later date. Most people read using a combination of both methods, anyway.

[Lillian J]

Here's an article about a simple and natural process used by Donn and Jean Reed, who homeschooled four children and authored The Home School Source Book (this article is an excerpt from the book): Learning to Read

Lillian

[Kaitnbugsmom]

subbing. perhaps some of the ideas will help my very-ready but under-taught {PS'd} dd. I'm especially intrested in starfall.com as I've heard of it before in passing...

[flyingspaghettimama]

Here's an article about a simple and natural process used by Donn and Jean Reed, who homeschooled four children and authored The Home School Source Book (this article is an excerpt from the book): Learning to Read

I like their emphasis on writing to read. That is very cool. It sounds like they used sight-reading methods. And I certainly don't throw my hat into either camp. Different ones work for different kids. However...this is not so correct...

The conventional "sounding out" of "baby" is buh-ay-buh-ee. Once the child can point to the letters in turn and make these sounds, we are supposed to say, "Very good! Now say the sounds faster; run them together.&rldquo; We are supposed to demonstrate the method, slowly and ponderously saying, "BUHay-buhEE" over and over, until the child finally hears - or guesses - the word "baby." "Now you do it faster," we say, with the reminder "Sound out each letter, then run the sounds together - and you have the word!".

I agree that saying "buh" for the /b/ sound is confusing. likewise, you wouldn't say "CUH" "AH" "TUH." Because then you have a cuhahtuh, not a cat. I don't know if I'd like to meet a cuhahtuh, particularly on a moonless night.

It was challenging to relearn the sounds by how they actually sound, not "B says buh." And the word "baby" would be an awfully challenging word to start with for sounding out (long A vowel! Y acting as a second vowel). But I think a phonemic approach works just fine if you actually make the sounds of the letters, and remember it's a jumping-off point, not that children will continue to sound out words for years to come. Although I still do (particularly if confronted with a word like Humuhumunukunukuapua'a. Say. For Example.)

This may sound odd, but my 3yo taught himself to read, and I'm worried sick over it! I recently read a book that is VERY pro-phonics, and it made the case that precocious readers are often at a disadvantage later on, because they learn to read at a time when their brains simply AREN'T able to understand a decoding approach. They sight read almost exclusively, which works well until they hit 2nd or 3rd grade work, in which they have to start decoding more and more.

I don't know if I agree with that. There are rabid phonics people and rabid sight word people, and I think probably different ways work for different kids. Your kid happened to learn to sight-read. He will probably figure out the "code" and I wouldn't try pushing phonics on him. When he gets frustrated, he'll let you know. If he starts stabbing in the dark at words (say, he sees the word "worry" and guesses "work"), then you might point out the letter differences? Context clues? And so on?

[obiandelismom]

Originally Posted by lckrause

I am calling BS on this one.

Originally Posted by flyingspaghettimama

I don't know if I agree with that. There are rabid phonics people and rabid sight word people, and I think probably different ways work for different kids.

Yeah, you're probably right. The book is called Why Our Children Can't Read ( http://www.amazon.com/Children-Cant-...e=UTF8&s=books ), and although the author quotes LOTS of scientific research, she also seems to be pushing one particular reading "system" (Read America), which did make me leery when I read it. But it still scared the snot out of me! My ds DOES make tons of sightreading misses (jobs = jokes, etc), so a lot of the book rang true for me. But I know rarely is there one "right" way to teach anything...

[boongirl]

Originally Posted by flyingspaghettimama

There are rabid phonics people and rabid sight word people, and I think probably different ways work for different kids. Your kid happened to learn to sight-read. He will probably figure out the "code" and I wouldn't try pushing phonics on him. When he gets frustrated, he'll let you know. If he starts stabbing in the dark at words (say, he sees the word "worry" and guesses "work"), then you might point out the letter differences? Context clues? And so on?

My greataunt, who taught 1st grade for 40 years, gave me some advice when I became a teacher. She said some people are in favor of phonics; some prefer the whole language approach. Neither is right or wrong. People learn how to read many ways and there are many ways to teach people to read. Everyone should learn as many ways as possible.

And, I do disagree with the idea that a 3 year old teaching themselves to read is not profoundly gifted. There is no consensus on the meaning of giftedness nor profound giftedness but when a child is learning to read by teaching themselves at an age 3+ years before peers, that child is at the very least gifted and most likely more gifted than the average gifted. Even an above average 3 year old does not teach themselves to read a book by themselves. You can argue that that is not profoundly gifted but it is clearly way above average.

Originally Posted by obiandelismom

I recently read a book that is VERY pro-phonics, and it made the case that precocious readers are often at a disadvantage later on, because they learn to read at a time when their brains simply AREN'T able to understand a decoding approach. They sight read almost exclusively.

I learned to read by myself when I was 5. In two languages: English and Spanish. I never learned phonics or grammar and always had a very, very hard time when teachers would try to teach these things to me. It was like they were speaking a different language. My father and brother are completely the opposite. They learned to read late and rely on phonics to this day when reading. There are children for whom one way or the other is preferred. Like another language, the other way can be very difficult to learn. I can use pronunciation techniques to help me learn a new word I am more likely to figure it out by context. I remember it by sight. I think young children who learn to read by themselves do the same. They learn to read the books that are read to them. This is not to say that they are parroting the words. They may be, or they may be truly reading them. But, to a child who is truly learning the words by sight, phonics may be confusing or even frustrating. I hated first grade because all we did was phonics. To this day, I bear a grudge against phonics and teach it as little as possible.

Another piece of advice my great aunt gave is to be wary of people who claim their way is the only way to learn/teach. No one has a hold on that. There are many ways to learn and many ways to teach.