or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2004 - 2008  › November 2006 › Having more? Are you done?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Having more? Are you done?

post #1 of 32
Thread Starter 
I don't remember if this has been asked before, so I figured I'd post it anyway.

Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
post #2 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? We are done!

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? 100000000000 sure

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision? I feel done

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? My dh is getting fixed!
post #3 of 32
Thread Starter 
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?

We're done after this one (our third baby).

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?

I'd say an 8.

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?


It's our third and I always wanted three (dh wanted none, then one, then two and now three ). Both our boys have a genetic hearing impairement and this one may have one as well. While not a big deal, it still involves more time and attention for each of them (hearing tests, hearing aid appointments, speech therapy, school advocacy, etc) and I want to make sure we can meet their needs. Also, I'm a SAHM and love it. Housing and the cost of living in general is quite pricey in the Ottawa area. We want to make sure we can afford the lifestyle we feel is best for us (me at home/working from home part-time) without too much stress. Three is just about perfect for us


What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?


Other than the natural protection breastfeeding provides us, we're going to use FAM and condoms. We're going to wait a year or two before even thinking of permanent birth control (vasectomy). It's not something we want to jump into, just in case we change our minds for whatever reason.
post #4 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? Dh thinks we are done I, on the other hand, am not so sure!

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? Um...3?

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision? We decided 2 kids because we are dirt broke as it is and figure with 3 it would be even more of a financial strain...We'll see...

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? Well, after dd we didn't use anything: - I tried the mini pill but my af came anyway so my MW told me to "cross my fingers" becasue I was very fertile - um...she is right! This time we plan to use condoms and after a year or two we will decide if 2 really is "it" before dh gets a vasectomy.
post #5 of 32
Thread Starter 
Oops! I posted this in November forum!

My bad. But answer anyway! I'm going to cross-post in October. I'm due October 10th and am PRAYING not to have a third November baby for that reason
post #6 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?
We're planning more. My husband wants 3 (total), I'd like 4. This will be #2 for us.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?
10

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
We still want more =) He's one of 3, and three worked well for his family. I'm an only and always wanted a BIG family. I don't know if I could even win him over to the idea of 4 (I'd really like to keep kids even numbered so there hopefully isn't one left out)... I definitely don't think I'd win him over to more than that!

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
Well, before my son I did the pill, then the low-dose pill. While pregnant with him, I learned just how bad the pill is for your body, so I won't do that again. After R was born, we used condoms, and right before this baby was conceived I learned more about FAM. I didn't get my first cycle back until 1 week before R's first birthday, so I don't expect that things would start much earlier. But then I read stories of mamas who go to their 6-week post partum visit and find out they're already expecting... even though breastfeeding... and it scares the crap out of me! So we'll probably be exclusive breastfeeding with condoms for close to a year and then decide if/when we're ready for #3. I don't know that I'd trust myself as a FAM newbie until after this babe is a year... because I don't want to chance losing my milk supply before this babe gets 12 months of mama's milk.
post #7 of 32
No problem...It's a great thread. I'm from the Dec club, but I'd like to reply anyway.

Whether or not I have more will depend on how well I can handle this one, but I am already in love, so I can imagine doing something foolish like actually trying for another as soon as possible (this one was a surprise). :

That being said, I don't think I'd put a high degree of certainty on this prediction: I'd be at a 3, at most. Although I love to fantasize, I'm pretty grounded in reality, so I'll have to take it one step at a time. I have not thought about birth control yet, but I will certainly be sure to have that covered by the time I'm healed from the birth.
post #8 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?

We are already planning #3. This pregnancy has been insanely better healthwise than last time and I get the feeling that I could do this again-not the feeling I had when pregnant the first time.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? 10!

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?

We never wanted to have only one child. We always planned on having at least two. Now we are thinking at least 3.

Even though we are strapped financially now having more children will actually give us more money. Sweden has a great maternity/paternity pay and even though I don't have a job I will receive the minimum maternity leave pay. We also get barnbidrag (child allowance) each month, obviously we get more of that the more children we have. But in case it comes off this way, we aren't having children to get money. Just that in this case our financial problems don't really come into the equation.


What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? None planned at the moment. I'll probably go with charting. Hormones are not my friend and we both dislike condoms. When we are done having children dh is getting "the snip". He's seen me on depo provera and I think that scarred him for life.
post #9 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?
We are done.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?
9.5 (I would have said 10 last time, but as I am sitting here very pregnant right now, I realise there is no such thing as a sure thing.)

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
I will be 40 in Jan.
We will have 2, a DS and a DD. Two of them, two of us, I think is great.
We both agree to being "done."

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? [/QUOTE]
Dh wants to be snipped. OK with me after a few months wait. I am fertile as a rabbit. After nearly 20 years on the pill, I went off in late Nov and was pregnant in Jan, at age 37. This time I missed the pill for two days, had a fake period, and got pregnant right after, at age 39. If we don't do something I'll still be having babies at 45 or 50!
post #10 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?
I cannot imagine this being the last

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?
Probably 9

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
We both (DH and I) dont' feel 'done' I guess it all depends on my sanity

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
Just condoms
post #11 of 32
Interesting questions.
We are NOT done, this is our first.
I'm 110% sure
We want more than one child
Prolly nothing after the first year seeing as it took us over 2 yrs to concieve this child plus we needed lots of help.
post #12 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?

Yep! At least one more.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?

10

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?

Well, DH originally wanted 2 (so we weren't "outnumbered" ). He's an only child, and he knew he wanted more than 1. Well, I came from a family with 3 kids, so 3 just feels right to me, and I've told DH all along that I'd really like at least 3. Really, I'd like 4, but I thought I'd wait on pushing #4 until #3 was achieved. A couple months ago, DH finally started telling people that there WILL be a #3, probably 2-2.5 years after #2 is born. Yipee!

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?

I will use the Creighton Model of NFP, as I've been using since March 2003. It was at that point when I realized that the pill is abortifacient in some cases, and I didn't feel right using it. My friend was getting engaged, and through her church, she learned about NFP (she's Catholic, I'm not). So she had been using it for a few months and then told me about her teacher and I started doing that instead of the pill. Best decision I ever made! We absolutely did NOT want to get pregnant at that time, as we wanted to get some more bills paid off before I stopped working (SAHM). In Nov of that year, we decided to start TTC, and it was so nice that all we had to do was just start trying! That first month we were both sick, so didn't DTD at the appropriate times. But in Dec, we were both healthy, and we got pregnant with DS #1. After he came, I started charting again. AF didn't return until 16 months, and I knew it was coming because I noticed ovulation signs prior. Since DS was a preemie and we didn't know if it would happen again with #2, we didn't want to get pregnant at that time, so it was good that I was charting and saw I ovulated so we could avoid those days. Then when DS was 19 months, we decided that we were ready to start trying. In fact, we decided this 5 minutes before we tried. I love NFP! That cycle was a chemical pregnancy, but the following cycle, we got preg with #2!
post #13 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? Definitely having more.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? 10, 100%, absolutely positive (unless something goes wrong, and even then we'd adopt).

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?ure are you of this decision? DH and I are both only children, which means that both of us are positive we want more than one. Three sounds perfect, but we'll have to see. At the very least, we will not be having any only children and I can guarantee that.

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? No idea. This isn't even something I've thought about yet. Maybe a diaphragm?
post #14 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?
Yes, I plan on having as many as God gives me.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?
Pretty sure, unless once this baby is born he makes me change my mind

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
I always wanted to be a mom since I was a little girl.

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
I am a single mom, so I won't be using any bc until I get a partner, which it will be a long time from now.
post #15 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? We are done

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? I will also say a 9.5

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision? I will be 36 2 months after this baby is born, and he will be our fourth.

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? I am trying to talk dh into a vasectomy. At this point I am not sure if I am having much luck.
post #16 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?

We are done. D. O. N. E. DONE! I will never be pregnant again.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? 100% sure that I will never put my body through pregnancy again. We have still occasionally discussed adopting, but we will not have any more biological children.

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
Each of my children has been a preemie, born two weeks earlier than the last. I was on bedrest for significant amounts of time with 3 of them, including this last one, and it's just not fair to me or my family for me to be out of commission like that. I just can't handle the stress of constantly worrying about every twitch, BH ctx, or everything thinking that I might be going into labor. Plus, this will be boy #4, so I'm certain that if I got pg again it would be another boy, and I just don't know if I can handle more testosterone in my life, LOL!

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
I'm going for a VBAC, but if for some reason that winds up being a c/s, I will have my tubes tied during that. If I am successful with the VBAC, then Dh will being going for a vas sometime in late winter.
post #17 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? I do not want to be pregnant again, adoption later on is not out of the question though.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? 9, just because you can never say never otherwise it would be a 10.

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision? Pregnancy is too hard on me and physically and emotionally and I just can't do it again.

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? I would love it if my dh would get a vas, but he won't and we can't afford it anyway. So we will be using condoms and maybe fertiliy awareness to at least some degree.
post #18 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? We plan on having more, at least 1, maybe 2 more...

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision? 10

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision? I have always wanted 4-5 kids... and plan on adopting more later on...

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby? We use NFP either way... to prevent and to help... we have been doing NFP for about 7 years now...
post #19 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished?
Oh, I'm totally undecided. At this point, DH is quite certain that he doesn't want more, but his main reason is financial, and if he gets a job that pays him better (I'm a SAHM), he would definitely be on board with a third. I can see it either way, I would be thrilled to have two boys and stop there, but I can also see wanting to add a third in a few years, when this one gets closer to three years old.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?
Obviously, not at all, so I'm going to have to say ONE!

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
As I mentioned, financial...DH's job just doesn't pay much, and we want to be able to take vacations and not have to *worry* about paying the bills. He cares more than I do about the financial side of it, I'm of the camp that says that there's never enough money, and there's no such thing as too much love, but I respect his concerns as the money-maker, and I can't force him to want another child. And while pregnancy is fine, I am not one of those women that loves being pregnant, I have a difficult time with it, and I don't think I want to do it again. We both have a heart to adopt and/or foster, so we definitely want to keep that in mind as the boys get older.

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
We'll be using FAM for a while...I didn't get my period last time until Henry was over a year old, so hopefully we'll have the same experience, and I'll do the Creighton thing until I get my first period. DH is already looking into a vasectomy, and while I am fine about him doing that, we'll wait until this one is about two or three to do it, since we (okay, since I) am really leaning toward wanting three.


These are interesting, thanks for posting it - I love reading what everyone else is thinking and planning!
post #20 of 32
Are you planning on having more babies after this one or do you think you're finished? I want more, DH wants to see how this one goes.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how sure are you of this decision?10

What are some of the factors that helped you make this decision?
This is our first, and I do not want an only child.

What birth control method(s), if any, will you be using after the baby?
We use NFP either way.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: November 2006
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2004 - 2008  › November 2006 › Having more? Are you done?