Pretty, pretty, pretty, barbie, pretty princess

[QueenSheba'sMom]

I really want to explain to my (almost) 5 year old dd why the pretty pretty barbie romantic princess love kissy prince charming best pinkest prettiest make-up high-heel pretty=nice ugly=mean talk is driving me mad, but I'm having a hard time articulating it.

Any tips?

[aprilushka]

No, I worry I will deal with this some day. The only thing I can think of is changing the subject relentlessly.

[QueenSheba'sMom]

I make a big point of showing her how everyone is beautiful, and how beauty comes in all colors and shapes and sizes and forms. I talk about how nature is beautiful a lot. I tell her that make-up is fun to play with, but it makes people look funny...

...but she's still got it bad...

[Roar]

What you value most in other people is kindness, intelligence, courage, etc. not beauty. Beauty doesn't help other people, pay the bills, care for the sick, etc. And, you don't agree that pink is what make stuff pretty. We don't all have the same standard for what makes stuff pretty. Time to read some stories with very strong girl characters who aren't all about being pretty.

[aprilushka]

Oh sure, I know you have to try and point out the other things...that's what I meant by changing the subject, away from the beauty of barbie or whatever to the beauty of a sunset or how interesting something is that's not girlie/beauty.

[kangamom]

If anyone can figure this out, I would love to know. My dd (6) thinks (directly because of Barbie) that blonde/blue eyes is the epitomy of beauty. I'm always trying to point out the beauty in other colors/ethnicities/etc., but its not done any good so far. When we look at styling catalogs at haircut time she only picks out blonde models and says, "I want my hair like that." Her best friend is blonde and she just goes on and on about how pretty she is. The thing is, dd's hair is brown as can be, and her eyes are hazel.

[momma2mingbu]

Originally Posted by QueenSheba'sMom

I really want to explain to my (almost) 5 year old dd why the pretty pretty barbie romantic princess love kissy prince charming best pinkest prettiest make-up high-heel pretty=nice ugly=mean talk is driving me mad, but I'm having a hard time articulating it.

Any tips?

Has she seen Beauty and the Beast?
The sorceress who turns the prince into the beast looks ugly, but is just testing him to see if he'll be nice. When he is not, it is revealed that she is actually a beautiful woman and he is turned into an ugly beast. Belle falls in love with the BEAST and not with the handsome prince. Lots of opportunities with this story to talk about how what's inside the person is what's important and that we need to look more than skin deep.

[lasciate]

Did your daughter tell you that Barbie is why she thinks blonde is best? Barbie was my favourite toy all through my childhood and I thought black hair was the most gorgeous ever, despite my own beautiful red hair