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Parents of crappy sleepers tribe... - Page 3

post #41 of 119
DD is 25 months, has always co-slept in our bed, though she does have her own mattress, attached to our bed (she's a mover during the night - around 19 months we needed more space!)... and currently wakes every 1.5 - 3 hours through the night to nurse or cuddle. The rare 4-hour stretches I'm usually still awake (I'm a crappy sleeper too, no surpise). Glad we're not the only ones!
post #42 of 119
Yay, here's a great tribe for me! Although I admit my son is not quite as bad a sleeper as many of the little ones here

The only thing so far I've found to help my son is to lie down with him at nap time. I know this won't work for many people, but it's the only way I can get him to take naps longer than 20-45 mins. If he dosn't take at least 2 one hour naps he sleeps worse at night.

He seems to sleep worse at night near me...like he can smell me and that distracts him. Plus my husband is always moving around which I think keeps him up...and he's pretty restless himself...always moving around.
post #43 of 119
me too!!!!

ds is just about to be one and i can count on my hands the number of times he has slept for than four hours, sometimes 2 hours...lately, up every hour til i come to bed then two three hour chunks then nurse all morning (6-i can't take it anymore.....

somedays i am really serene about the whole thing and somedays i am ashamed of my lack of patience.
post #44 of 119

oh no!!

Ok, I have gone through and read all of these posts again and I am discouraged now! I don't want this constant waking and night nursing to continue for years to come!!! Recently, I have tried to get him back to sleep without nursing (co-sleeping). It worked, but not until he cried for about 45 minutes. He was very angry, crying and kept crawling over to me climbing on me trying to get me to nurse him. I just stuck with it and refused (because he had just nursed 45 minutes prior to that) and eventually he went back to sleep. But, he had to be right next to me!! Literally, laying on my arm with his face right in mine.

We have a king size bed. My husband doesn't sleep with us cause my DS wakes so often. I am ALWAYS on the edge of the bed because DS pushes me over there by rolling over several times until he is comfortable - waste of bed space I tell you!! I am getting so tired of it!! As I said before, I love to cuddle with him and I love the security of him in my bed, but I wonder if he is in his own bed if he will sleep for longer stretches of time. Problem is, everytime I put him in his bed, he immediately wakes up, cries and stands up in the crib. Is it hopeless????????????????
post #45 of 119
How old is your ds? Honestly, you're his comfort.....his special person. They want to be close and keep that comfort with nursing. (I'm sure you know this, I'm just re-iterating is all).

I believe that my son keeps dh and I up and vice versa. I have to wait until he is deeply asleep before I transfer him to his crib. I have the blankets warmed up with a heating pad first, then take it off before I put him in, so his blankets are nice and warm. I know you've said you've tried this, but your son will have to be DEEPLYf asleep...that could take a while to wait for, and in the meantime y\ou can fall sleep waiting for this. If ds wakes up and keeps waking up, I just bring him to bed with me and we try again the next night. Early in the morning after he wakes up again (on a good night it's about 3x) he comes into bed to stay.

Honsetly, if he's crying hard for 45 mins wanting to nurse....that's likely the only thing that's going to comfort him and he knows it. Perhaps he even needs it. If you are cosleeping and trying to get him to sleep by not nursing, it's not going to work...he can smell you right there and knows you're there...not nursing him will just make him more unhappy and take longer for him to settle.

I know this isn't really helpful.....you aren't really alone. I've sort of resigined myself to the situation, since I refuse to let him CIO, and now it kinda works once I discovered I have to wait to let him be deeply asleep. I'm a night owl anyway so this works.
post #46 of 119
This is definately the tribe for me. My one year old wakes almost every hour from the time she goes to bed at around 8 or 9 pm until morning. Nothing gets her back to sleep but nursing. I wouldn't mind so much if she didn't stay latched on the whole night. At times it feels as if I am nursed raw! I am at my wit's end!!!
post #47 of 119
My daughter is 17 months and has never slept through the night. She was waking up almost every hour to nurse. We got her a big girl bed at 1 year since then she sleeps in it about 3 hours (if I'm lucky) each night. I just became pregnant and my daughter stopped nursing cold turkey, she knew before I did. Since she has stopped nursing at night she has been sleeping longer stretches. She still tosses and turns but I love having her next to me at night. I am hoping by age 3 she will be sleeping through the night
post #48 of 119
I totally belong here! Ds has co-slept from the start, he's now 19 months. At around 6 months, since he was nursing less at night, we would put him in his own bed (in our room) and he would sleep until 5 or 6 and then nurse and dose back off. He kept this up, unless he was teething, until dh started to work evening. Dh would come home and shower (and our last home was tiny and our beds were right next to the bathroom) and it seemed to cause ds to sleep lighter...so he would be awake by 1 or 2 a.m.

We've since moved, ds has his own room and toddler bed away from the sounds of dh showering but I think he just made a new habit of getting up. He climbs into our bed, some nights as early as 11...and if we're really lucky, he'll only kick us enough to wake us a couple of times...but there have been numerous nights that he wakes up, walks around, talks, etc.,etc. I have to say though, since the time changed and it's now darker earlier, he seems to sleep longer in his own bed...strange. Oh, and Calms Forte 4 Kids helps when he starts getting super restless in his sleep (or can't fall asleep to begin with). Wow, we have no clue what to do.

I had insomnia as a child and I'm so afraid he'll have it too. I don't want him to have to deal with that!!! : And I'm pregnant and we only have a double bed, so it's getting cramped...and I know the new baby will be in there with us too since I'll be nursing, that's why we want ds to learn to sleep, at least most of the night, on his own. He feels better in the morning when he's slept longer in his bed...I guess his sleep is less disturbed since he logs more hours before making the trek to our bed.

Oy, best of luck to us all.

jiva
post #49 of 119
Subbing . . .

15 month old ds hasn't ever slept longer than 3 hours and the last time he did that was about two weeks ago. Otherwise he is up 4 -5 times a night. I don't know what it feels like to be awake and feel 'good'. His 3 hour sleep stretches are few and far between. Could someone on this thread get their magic wand out and spread some sleeping dust on our horrible sleepers ?

Double espresso anyone? :
post #50 of 119
Hi. Ds is 27 months old and is a challenging sleeper too. Always has been (although lately it has been getting better). When I was pregnant last summer (just before his first birthday) it would take us around 2 hours to get hime to sleep, then he was waking up every 45 minutes throughout the night and getting up most nights around 1:00am for an hour or so to eat (he was still nursing but I had lost my milk supply). Between him not sleeping and being pregnant I was really afraid I was going to loose my mind.

As I said, he is doing a lot better now. Most nights it takes 30 minutes to an hour to get him to sleep and then he'll sleep for 4 or 5 hours (until about midnight) in his own room at which point he will come to our bed. From that point he'll wake up every two hours or so to nurse. The nice thing is he'll only nurse for about 15 minutes then go back to sleep (as long as I sleep with my back to him so he doesn't smell my breasts ).

The biggest problem with him is that he is a super light sleeper and can't be moved at all. It doesn't matter how deeply he is sleeping. He's been that way since he was born. Well DD is up now. Got to go!

ETA: The things I have noticed that have helped are putting him on a night time routine and most importantly getting him exercise during the day. If we don't go to the playground or take him out for a walk he is up all night.
post #51 of 119
Apparently I was in too much of an exhausted haze to find this tribe until now!

But seriously, DS is 3.5 and has been a horrible sleeper since about day 10 or so. Phew it's been a long ride. Mostly now I just accept it. It's become easier to accept since we've started using melatonin, which helps dramatically with the going to sleep. I was at a point until a few months ago when we started where I felt like the whole charade of going to sleep at night was ruining my life, my health, my vitality, etc. I know that's dramatic, but it was like an all-out fight -- nightly. : :

So, now DS has slept through the night 3 times in the last 2.5 months and we're pretty much just used to it.

I'm so curious to see how another kid will be when we get to bring another one into our family....and if getting up so much in the night with him/her will feel different or just like more of the same. I guess I hope for the latter -- not so much transition then!

Thanks for having this tribe!
megin
post #52 of 119
My youngest son has never slept through the night. He is 21 months old. He wakes up nightly. Sometimes it is 1-2 times. Many times he wants to get out of bed and run for hours. He has PDD-NOS. He had a sleep study last weekend. We will see what it says next week.

I do let my son stay up until 9-10 pm and sometimes he wakes up at 12 and sometimes at 1. I have not slept more than 2 hrs a time in years.

Happy sleeping to all of you. I know how frustrating it can be to never get sleep. I should be asleep now since I'll be up later!

Take care,
post #53 of 119

Home at last!

Oh my gosh! I just found my long lost home! I actually just called the lac consultant who runs the local bfing support group (not LLL) and she said the only thing she has to suggest is letting my baby CIO. I feel like everyone in my family/group of friends/ etc except me is advocating for CIO. Even DH! But then again, he isn't there for it since he works at night.

I can't take it anymore. Dylan not sleeping is affecting me during the day as well as at night. Nothing is getting done in my house... literally nothing. My kitchen hasn't been cleaned in a week and there are no more dishes to cook on. I am avoiding work: my massages are suffering because I don't have to energy or spirit to put into them. I am not taking care of my husband. And worst of all, I resent the baby for keeping me awake and not allowing me any time just to breathe. I am getting angry over the slightest thing that Dylan does. The other day I lost it because he wouldn't hold still to get his diaper off.

Now he's nursing ALL night. And I mean, he is latched for the entire night. If I pull him off, he will cry and cry and cry. I don't know what to do anymore.... He's only 7 months but I can't work and nurse him all night. I can't sleep because I am so tired. I just don't know what to do anymore.
post #54 of 119
Quote:
Originally Posted by njohnson View Post
Ok, Recently, I have tried to get him back to sleep without nursing (co-sleeping). It worked, but not until he cried for about 45 minutes. He was very angry, crying and kept crawling over to me climbing on me trying to get me to nurse him. I just stuck with it and refused (because he had just nursed 45 minutes prior to that) and eventually he went back to sleep. But, he had to be right next to me!! Literally, laying on my arm with his face right in mine.
This happened to me last night. Dylan had been nursing for an hour and I needed to get to sleep. He did the same thing and then cried for an hour when climbing on me and rooting didn't magically lift my shirt for him to nurse. Eventually, I just let him nurse bc it was easier.
post #55 of 119
I'd like to join the club. All of my kids have been crappy sleepers and I am just sick and tired of it (literally!) My 14 month old want to nurse all night and literally be latched on to the nipple. So I never get any sleep more than about 1-2 hours at a time. Which makes for a very cranky mommy. I absolutely have to take a nap during the day or I cannot make it. Again, literally. I have been having some health problems and I just can't do it anymore.

And if I do finally get the baby sleeping, I still have the others waking me up: bad dreams, asthma/allergy coughing, have to pee, need a drink, the list is endless.

Oh, sweet sleep!
post #56 of 119

what am I doing wrong?

hello..I just saw this thread tonite..and it's definetely us! I have 4 girls..none of which has yet to sleep thru the nite. One of the twins wants to nurse ALL nite (literally..if she's not latched then she's crying!!)..my other twin is actually hospitalized right now so I have to do some pumping for her..my 3yo is no better..she's up and down all nite wanting to nurse..and my 5yo always needs something during the nite. I think I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll never sleep a whole nite again until they graduate from college!!

I am :yawning: and desperate..any advice on getting even just the older 2 to sleep thru the nite?
post #57 of 119
I definitely belong here. My ds also slept great from about 2-4 months and then it was all over. He doesn't nap unless he's nursing and falls asleep on me, and he now wakes about 5-8 times each night. I know he's only 7 months and I certainly don't expect him to be sleeping 12 hours straight, but I'm lucky if I get a 2 hour stretch. It's just getting very exhausting, I do all the nighttime parenting and I'm so I can't even get his pictures taken because he's always too cranky from the lack of sleep.
post #58 of 119
Where have I been for the last 2 1/2 years while all my friends kids slept and mind didn't. DS decided even to stop napping at 18 months while I was pregnant with dd and boy was THAT hard
So glad I found this little place I think will be my new home!!
post #59 of 119
Quote:
Originally Posted by timneh_mom View Post
Mama8... we tried to let DS stay up til he was pretty much ready to crash, and we wore out long before he did...
I always wondered if that would work!!!
post #60 of 119
Quote:
Originally Posted by joeysmom1729 View Post
I definitely belong here. My ds also slept great from about 2-4 months and then it was all over. He doesn't nap unless he's nursing and falls asleep on me, and he now wakes about 5-8 times each night. I know he's only 7 months and I certainly don't expect him to be sleeping 12 hours straight, but I'm lucky if I get a 2 hour stretch. It's just getting very exhausting, I do all the nighttime parenting and I'm so I can't even get his pictures taken because he's always too cranky from the lack of sleep.
Just thought I would chime in- we have a 7 month old, SAME EXACT SITUATION, but, she never, ever slept great. She does seem to get enough sleep though- not tired during the day, takes normal naps (but ONLY on top of the boppy on our laps- never, not one time, have we been able to move her wtihout her instantly waking, even if we wait a half hour, hour, whatever first. She is a rediculously light sleeper). Right now we are also just about at our wits' end, and am going to try to remove constant nursing and see if it helps. She's in a crib sidecared to our bed. She makes lots of noise, will cry, move around.. but she isn't actually awake when she is doing all of this. She also won't take a pacifier anymore (she used to, just a bit, when she was falling asleep and then spit it out. But now, she immediately launches it out of her mouth and gets mad.)

My husband does not wake up the way I do to her noises- part of the problem is that I am a bad sleeper too! So we are going to try something where I will sleep in another room on the aerobed on the floor, and he will bring her to me for her middle of the night feeding, (or I will go to her more likely), but he will deal with her otherwise. (Till now it has been me up all night with her). I am curious to see if his natural ability to not rouse to her lesser crying/fussing will actually help her calm down by herself a bit. We will see. I know that on here, with AP, people are generally pro only cosleeping, infinite nursing, etc. But I honestly believe some kids need their own space, and that includes the ability to fuss a bit without being immediately soothed. I don't think we should have to nurse ALL night- in fact, I think that can keep them awake and fussy. I think all "stimulants" have to be removed for some kids, and sometimes we are included in that.

I"ll let this thread know how our experiment goes after a week or so. We would never CIO, but I think lying next to her and saying "ssssssssshhhhhh" quietly as she fusses, but not nursing, is not CIO at all. I think my husband will be able to get away with that since he won't smell like milk- I think that wakes her up sometimes! -j
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