Parents of crappy sleepers tribe... - Page 5

[Sandrine]

Dd1 slept thru the night 3x at the end of last wk and now is back to her usual wakings. *sign* It was good while it lasted. Hopefully she will start again soon.

[Enudely]

[QUOTE=formerluddite;6712200]...bump...

anyone sleeping?

nope, not yet

[teacup]

Originally Posted by formerluddite

...bump...

anyone sleeping?

i've been lurking in the allergies section and "healing the gut tribe" threads; lots of crappy sleepers over there.

anybody here dealing with allergies?

My daughter has had a bad rash on her face for a few weeks now and I'm trying to get to the bottom of it. She has reflux as a baby, so I'm beginning to suspect a milk allergy. She does have excema, so I have been spiking her oatmeal with flax oil. Works like a charm for her dry trunk, but her face is a mess. It's like acne. I digress.

But she has slept through two nights this week. That is the second and third time. In her life. And she's almost 2. I woke at 6am, with a start and couldn't sleep. She woke at 7am when SO went to check on her, worried because she wasn't awake. We're trying to cut her two-hour nap to one in hopes that she'll sleep better at night.

[dynamohumm6]

Can I join?
I'm at my wits end with the rest of you. My 18 month old ds is on a bad sleeping kick that's lasted about 4 months now. It coincided with his molars starting to come in, and he's only got three of them (and 6 teeth besides that, so we have a LOT of teething left). I'm delirious. He eats plenty during the day, he wants to nurse near constantly at night. I don't mind nursing him during the night - it's the marathon "I'll scream if you remove your nipple from my mouth at any time" crap, and THE GROPING that drives me absolutely NUTS. He can. Not. Nurse. unless he is clawing at my other breast. I can't take it - the groping has been going on for almost a year. Seriously. I've tried every single trick in the book (and I had lots) to get him to stop, and it's impossible. So, night nursing keeps me 100% awake, fighting off his clawing, mauling hands. I get about 3 hrs a night, dh will not do (he wants me, and only me if I'm nursing him). I'm starting to resent night nursing (nursing AT ALL, even, especially when I'm completely empty and he's just gnawing on me), and that makes me sad on top of being infinitely tired.

*sigh*

There, feels good to just bitch about it.

[Cujobunny]

I'm gonna jump in on this too. Last night ds woke up at 1:30 (it was his 2nd waking at least) and was awake until 3:30, which meant I was awake that whole time too. He nursed for a while when he first woke, then he was just too wiggly, sticking his bum in the air with my nipple in his mouth (ouch) so I closed my shirt and told him ba-bas were cold. He was cool with that, but did not want to lie still. He wasn't upset at all, just chatty and wanting to be awake.

I don't get it. DH and I are (or used to be!) great sleepers. Hopefully he grows into it.

[formerluddite]

Originally Posted by teacup

But she has slept through two nights this week. That is the second and third time. In her life. And she's almost 2.

: : hooray!!!:

send out some of that good sleep karma!

[formerluddite]

Originally Posted by dynamohumm6

Can I join?
I'm at my wits end with the rest of you. My 18 month old ds is on a bad sleeping kick that's lasted about 4 months now. It coincided with his molars starting to come in, and he's only got three of them (and 6 teeth besides that, so we have a LOT of teething left). I'm delirious. He eats plenty during the day, he wants to nurse near constantly at night. I don't mind nursing him during the night - it's the marathon "I'll scream if you remove your nipple from my mouth at any time" crap, and THE GROPING that drives me absolutely NUTS. He can. Not. Nurse. unless he is clawing at my other breast. I can't take it - the groping has been going on for almost a year. Seriously. I've tried every single trick in the book (and I had lots) to get him to stop, and it's impossible. So, night nursing keeps me 100% awake, fighting off his clawing, mauling hands. I get about 3 hrs a night, dh will not do (he wants me, and only me if I'm nursing him). I'm starting to resent night nursing (nursing AT ALL, even, especially when I'm completely empty and he's just gnawing on me), and that makes me sad on top of being infinitely tired.

*sigh*

There, feels good to just bitch about it.

both of mine were gropers/clawers. drove me crazy!!! they'd go for my throat, too. i tried to keep fingernails reallllly short thru that phase, tried lots of techniques (things to hold, holding/restraining their hand,...). i would wear a t-shirt to bed and keep it pulled down to cover my throat and other breast. i'd also switch to the "up mama" sooner so that i was rolled over onto the lower breast so it was out of reach (she's on my left side; i don't switch her spot). once they were old enough to understand (?15mos) i made it a dicipline issue ("you're hurting mama. stop clawing or we're done"). i think it was because they were in pain, and it stopped when teething was done.

you've probably tried teething remedies...? homeopathics, ointments, drugs (tylenol/advil)? lots of downsides to drugs, but there's times when mama is just too strung out psycho from sleep deprivation and you do what you have to do to get thru the night.

for the all night attachment thing, have you tried the pantley pull off?

[dynamohumm6]

What's the pantley pull off?

My strategies have been:
*wearing a tight fitting nursing tank to bed...this worked for about three days, until he figured out how to break into it.
*giving him the top breast and laying on the other (this resulted in him working diligently at getting his hand between the bed and my chest...the child is nothing if not tenacious).
*hand holding (works for 30 seconds)
*1001 variations of "gentle hands"...basically, when I try to keep him from groping, he gets MAD and tries to hit me instead. It feels like a lose/lose situation, you know? I'm all for "you're hurting mama/we're done", but that results in lots of crying and yelling and tantruming, and a lot of times in the middle of the night I cave and just lay there fuming letting him claw at me instead of dealing with the shrieking. And that's my fault, I need to just be consistant about not letting him nurse if he's doing that.
How long, in your opinion, should I keep him off before letting him try again, when he's doing that?

Thanks for the response.

[Aliviasmom]

My dd is just two and STILL doesn't sleep through the night on about 95% of nights! When I get up with her, I bring her back to bed with me, but that doesn't mean she'll sleep long, or straight. Sometimes she wakes up early. Sometimes she starts playing in the middle of the night and ends up back in her crib... The list goes on and on. She's a good girl overall though, so I can't complain too much!!

[bendmom]

Count me in! Ds #2 is 28 months and is constantly kicking off the covers, trying to switch sides, nursing anywhere from 3-8 times a night. Our oldest slept no problem at 1.5, and night weened himself, so this is taking some getting used to. Once dh work starts to slow down in May we will night ween and he will sleep with the boys upstairs. I am getting absolutely no sleep, and am up completely everytime he needs to nurse in the night. I just found three new deep wrinkles under my eyes and I'm only 27

[formerluddite]

Originally Posted by dynamohumm6

#1What's the pantley pull off?

My strategies have been:
*wearing a tight fitting nursing tank to bed...this worked for about three days, until he figured out how to break into it.
*giving him the top breast and laying on the other (this resulted in him working diligently at getting his hand between the bed and my chest...the child is nothing if not tenacious).
*hand holding (works for 30 seconds)
*1001 variations of "gentle hands"...basically, when I try to keep him from groping, he gets MAD and tries to hit me instead. It feels like a lose/lose situation, you know? I'm all for "you're hurting mama/we're done", but that results in lots of crying and yelling and tantruming, and a lot of times in the middle of the night I cave and just lay there fuming letting him claw at me instead of dealing with the shrieking. And that's my fault, I need to just be consistant about not letting him nurse if he's doing that.
#2How long, in your opinion, should I keep him off before letting him try again, when he's doing that?

Thanks for the response.

(my #s, bold)

#1. "pantley pull off" is described in the No Cry Sleep Solution (often referred to in posts as NCSS). when baby gets to sleep, but is still attached and not getting milk, you wait for flutter/pause nursing, put pressure under the tongue (soft part behind chin in between jaw bone area), pushing upwards. then slowwwllllly release suction and ease your nipple out, maintaining pressure so baby doesn't suddenly feel a big void where your nipple was. if baby rouses, let him reattatch and try again in a few minutes.

#2. hard to say, nighttime is a tough time to have dicipline. it's been years since dd1 (who would throw a fit if awake and not nursed...). i think she would just stop the clawing once she was deeply enough asleep (?20min) and that's when i'd detatch her. dd2 is more restless, but can seem restlessly half awake, yet when i detach her (break the suction) she often pops off and flings herself over, then lies still, asleep. she's sometimes able to be patted back to sleep, too, and if she cries about not being nursed back to sleep, it ususally only lasts a couple of minutes. not so insistent as dd1 was.

he really sounds like he's uncomfortable/in pain. have you looked into allergy issues? since it's been going on a year, did it start after you started solids? (doing the math...18mos minus a year = 6mos).

maybe try the dicipline part in the daytime first, be consistent about it then, and worry about the nighttime part later since he's probably pretty much asleep and not aware he's doing it. for daytime i'd be "done" until some other activity had taken place. eg stop nursing and get out a toy, do a chore, go for a walk, whatever sorts of things you do in between nursings anyway, probably at least 5 min and preface the next nursing with your expectations "remember, be gentle with mama." and stop again if he does it again.

it's hard to have dicipline associated with nursing, because you want it to be the warm safe haven of your relationship, not something that drives you crazy and filled with conflict.:

[dynamohumm6]

Originally Posted by formerluddite

it's hard to have dicipline associated with nursing, because you want it to be the warm safe haven of your relationship, not something that drives you crazy and filled with conflict.:

so true, i can't tell you how many tears i've shed over this.

Thanks for the input, I *really* appreciate it.
I haven't ruled out allergies, and yes, I am going to look into that much further.

[maymorales]

Sleepless Nights

My DS does not seem to have any food allergies except regular milk gives him gas. So I give him Lactose-free version. We're not nursing now. But he still doesn't sleep well.
He's active, turning one and pretty big for his age. He naps a little more than an hour twice each day in his crib. But at night, he goes down at around 8:30 and then by 11:30, he's up almost every hour. When we bring him to bed, he's struggling to go back to sleep. Putting him back to the crib only conjurs hysterics.
He has never been a good sleeper since about 9 weeks old. Back then, I was going crazy with a crying baby that can't settle down and woke up every hour. Although he has gotten a little better, I still think his sleep pattern is unhealthy.
Docs don't find anything wrong with him. But he seems so uncomfortable. Plus, we are miserably sleep-deprived. Any tips / suggestions would be much appreciated.
Please, I'm tired of parents who boast about how well their children sleep. I hear one more of those smug "my kids slept through the night since birth" or "the baby sleeps so well I have to wake to feed" comment, I'm going to blow!
This post is so comforting. If any of you have discovered helpful strategies since the origin of this thread, please pass it on. Thanks!:

[mom22girls]

Can we get a tribal membership card that we can flash when we do something stupid due to sleep deprivation (you know, pouring coffee into Cheerios, placing a phone call to someone, and forget who we're calling while the phone is ringing...)

My 2.5 year old screams things in the night like "I want the blue one." and I have to tell her, "here's the blue one," before she'll settle back. Argh!


-H

[maymorales]

Great Idea!

[QUOTE=mom22girls;6727367]Can we get a tribal membership card that we can flash when we do something stupid due to sleep deprivation (you know, pouring coffee into Cheerios, placing a phone call to someone, and forget who we're calling while the phone is ringing...)

I forget where my keys are, pay for grocery and forget the bags, forget a load of laundry at the laundromat or put coins in someone else's machine! If anyone can give me advice on how to transition my ds into his own crib or solutions to help him sleep more peacefully with us (he kicks, turns and struggles to stay in bed with us but cries when he sleeps in his crib), I'd be ever so grateful!:

[Ex Libris]

I'd like to join the sleep deprived mamas who do stupid things tribe! Just this week I left my purse in the bathroom at the grocery store, then left it in the car and had to walk back 3 blocks to get it, then lost part of the car seat (the little crotch pad) . . . I wonder what this next week will bring.

I haven't had a full night's sleep since ds was born. He nurses every 2 hours until about 3 am when he latches on and won't let go and wants to change side constantly. I've got permanent nerve damage in one of my arms from nursing with my arm up for 3 years.

AND I've got a groper, too. Doesn't matter that I've said thousands of times "stop digging in mama's shirt." Only difference is that now he repeats it back to me after he's done it.

[dynamohumm6]

Ooooh, a membership card would be wonderful. I've:

-stuck my parking pass in my tape deck in my car, instead of in the compartment above it. I even forced it when met with resisitance.
-found cereal in the fridge and milk in the pantry more than I care to admit.
-forgotten about two dozen english muffins in the toaster after they've popped up
-forgotten to take off my underwear before getting in the shower

all of these things I've blamed on not sleeping.

Anyway...I've decided to cut out dairy and see what happens. DH is skeptical, but I'm willing to try anything. A lot of what I was reading in the dairy allergy behaviour thread in Allergies describes DS quite well. Of course, this week is explained because the poor babe has a cold and can't really breathe and is coughing quite a bit. So he gets a free pass this week.

[Sandrine]

I don't want to jinx myself but dd1 seems to be on the right road of sleeping thru the night. She just turned 4, so i wonder if that's her magic number.

I'm keeping this magic dust as my other dds don't sleep thru either.

We have gone the dairy-free route before and it didn't help my dds. Hopefully it can help other family with sleep problems.

[timneh_mom]

Just bumping this

Anyone else find that too much stimulation makes nights particularly bad? DS actually slept all night about 5 nights in a row, then it was Christmas and it totally messed up his sleep for the next 3 nights in a row!

[Ex Libris]

Originally Posted by timneh_mom

Just bumping this

Anyone else find that too much stimulation makes nights particularly bad?

Yes, for sure!! Christmas was bad for us, too.

But I'm happy to report that ds slept through the night for the first time last night. Woo Hoo! :