How many successful UC'ers are out there? - Page 5

[forthebest]

I've had 2 up/uc and one hosp birth transferred from homebirth because the mw's wanted to go home. Honestly I feel society's attitudes to women's bodies in general is bad news and am not enlightened or made to feel secure by the medical establishments(and much of society's) narrow-minded views on childbirth and our bodies in general. It seems demeaning and cruel some of the stuff they get up to when we are in the vulnerable( yet powerful) state of pregnancy and childbirth. I felt healed after uc, I knew I could do it yet was made to feel irresponsable and selfish, for me childbirth is a private,intimate, magical event and my hospital birth was more like a conveyor belt ride, fending off unwanted/unneccesary debasement rituals, infantilized(bad girl not doing what she is told) and general sexual humiliation. Apparently to a lot of people even feeling those feelings is in their view pathetic. But so what, plastic people in a plastic world mean nothing to me, what does matter to me is women having the right to birth freely and it would appear that fear and doubt are used to control us further, imo childbirth is a very political issue, our choices are so often dismissed, ignored and over-ruled. More support for uc and hb is essential and I have been greatly encouraged by what I have read on mdc, one size doesn't fit all though and I didn't want anyone with me when I uc'd, thats just me,I didn't want internals, instucted pushing, stupid pads shoved at me or my children miles away. I understand that other women differ in what they are comfortable with and see no reason why supportive people could not be available to help if needed rather than take over and possibly instill fear. Childbirth seems to come with a menu these days and I have to accept that some women would actually choose to have a cs for no actual reason or be induced cos the doc says so and again no actual reason, that is bizarre and sad, there is a perceptable retaliation against natural cb as though it's too primitive and maybe a tad distaseful. Weird.

[rmzbm]

Originally Posted by alegna

It is very uneducated to jump straight to a c-section out of fear.

Wow...as much as I normally respect your opinion, that was - I dunno.
Some people have phobias - others have fears of certain things that, while not a phobia, is quite a debilitation.
I consider myself VERY educated & had sections out of morbid fear.
My feelings are valid as were my responses to them. There's always next time, of course, but I can't seem to get "comfy" with vaginal birth no matter how hard to I try forcing myself to the contrary.
But does this make me uneducated? No, it makes me scared.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by rmzbm

Wow...as much as I normally respect your opinion, that was - I dunno.
Some people have phobias - others have fears of certain things that, while not a phobia, is quite a debilitation.
I consider myself VERY educated & had sections out of morbid fear.
My feelings are valid as were my responses to them. There's always next time, of course, but I can't seem to get "comfy" with vaginal birth no matter how hard to I try forcing myself to the contrary.
But does this make me uneducated? No, it makes me scared.

The OP was saying that she wants a UC, but if no UC then straight to a section. Fear or not, that IS an uneducated choice. I am not saying that a woman who choses a section out of fear is uneducated. I'm saying that the choice is.

-Angela

[rmzbm]

Originally Posted by alegna

The OP was saying that she wants a UC, but if no UC then straight to a section. Fear or not, that IS an uneducated choice. I am not saying that a woman who choses a section out of fear is uneducated. I'm saying that the choice is.

-Angela

That's valid, thank you.
This is a huge "raw" spot for me as I really DO want a normal birth and I understand it's safer & a better choice for many reasons. But when it comes down to it I have gotten myself so worked up over it (during pregnancy) that I would shake, sweat & nearly vomit. I can't understand where it comes from. Sometimes I wonder if it's kind of like a premonition - I dunno.
I agree...lots of gray between UC & a section!

[nznats]

This is an interesting thread... I have not yet had my UC so cant really comment on that part, I however can comment on who I want at my birth. I am not a girly girl and to be honest dont get on with many woman, my friends are mainly men. For my birth I do not see myself surrounded by woman, I feel I would be more comfortable with men being there, which is obviously something seen as weird in society especially one where men were pretty much excluded from anything birth not that long ago.
I have read many birth stories where mama has decided to go to the hospital, in many I do see some of the reasons being fear, but until you (collective you not direct you) have been in there position then you can never say for sure if it was just fear that instigated the transfer.

[rmzbm]

Originally Posted by nznats

I have read many birth stories where mama has decided to go to the hospital, in many I do see some of the reasons being fear, but until you (collective you not direct you) have been in there position then you can never say for sure if it was just fear that instigated the transfer.

"Just" fear, hu? Fear alone isn't valid?

I give up on the B&B forum. I really do. Shame as there's alot of knowlegable mom's here. I just can't seem to wade through the attitude anymore.

I hope some of the more "self righteous" ones never face a section that they NEED. Oh, wait...that never happens...I always forget...

Goodbye, Birth & Beyond!

~Marie, who was "just scared."

[nznats]

Originally Posted by rmzbm

"Just" fear, hu? Fear alone isn't valid?

I give up on the B&B forum. I really do. Shame as there's alot of knowlegable mom's here. I just can't seem to wade through the attitude anymore.

I hope some of the more "self righteous" ones never face a section that they NEED. Oh, wait...that never happens...I always forget...

Goodbye, Birth & Beyond!

~Marie, who was "just scared."

I dont know why you quoted me, I dont think I had implied that fear wasnt enough. And if I did that was not my intention, considering fear is a massive part of birthing, it is also a massive part of survival... without it we would have died out millions of years ago. Fear is what drives us in many cases and although I know in birth it isnt the most ideal, there are usually reasons behind the fear that dont just involve lack of confidence...

You know the thing that angers me the most though is people saying I hope you never face a section that you need and didnt want... cos I have been there I had an emergency c-section and fear of standing up to the midwife and refusing to get out of the pool and refusing to have my waters broken is the reason that things went so wrong!!

[Sijae]

: me

I did it, totally worth it

Laura