Life With a Babe Week of 9/10

[Mimi37]

Ha ha, trying again with a Life w/ a Babe thread now that there are more of us with babes. (Hope this doesn't bug the pg mamas )

Things are good here. Talia got over her jaundice and then had problems with reflux - argh. The nurse I talked to on Friday after a totally sleepless night (every time I laid her down to sleep, after 2 minutes she would fuss, hiccup, burp, gag, cough, sneeze, choke, spit up all over herself, cry... it was so unpleasant for both of us...) -- anyway, the nurse said to give her teensy doses of Maalox, which seemed weird to me, but WOW it helped. I feel so much better now that she seems to be in less discomfort and I am getting more than 30 minutes sleep at a time... I am deeply in love with the nurse now.

Talia will be one month tomorrow(!!!!!!!!!) She is getting bigger -- chunkier thighs and a sweet little double chin. I am so proud (of ME and my breastmilk!! ) Ooo-- she's crying for more right now so I'm off. Peace and love and happy baby vibes to you mamas! What's new with your babes?

[dvons]

Woo Hoo!! I get to join this thread!!! Our little one is now 4 days old. She was born Thursday early in the morning and by Friday evening I could feel my milk starting to come in. Saturday morning was painful!! She has a great latch fortunately and other than curling my toes when she first latches nursing is going great!! Sometimes I still think I should be PG though since I totally had my brain fixated around going to 41+ weeks since that's when her older brother came. I didn't expect a 39 weeker but she was conceived on the Solstice so it's only fitting she arrived with the full moon, right?!

I still need to type up my birthstory... I should go do that.

Deb

[crazyeight]

OMG 1 week tomorrow....i feel like crying. shes still so small and yet the time is passing by. i feel like i should be running video all the time bu of course its mostly just sleeping at this point.

the latch is much better now and my breasts only hurt at the very end of the feeding even though she still isn't emptying the breast. i am still engorged so i hope it goes down fairly soon so that i know shes getting enough hindmilk.

had our first dr. appt. today. 8 lbs (born at 8lbs 8 oz) but hasn't gotten any longer. her head grew a cm i think. she won't fit back in now! i think shes starting to go into a growth spurt she has slept all day today and i think (hope!!) she sleeps well tonight also.

got out the sling today but haven't had a chance to use it. she went a whole 3 hours today without eating!! mostly shes eating every hour and a half to 2 hours which seems like pretty much all the time.

I feel weird not being pregnant. i wonder where the last week went. i just can't believe that this ddc has just gotten started in births, that so many women are still anticipating those first ctx. its so hard to comprehend!! i think the fast labor really threw me for a loop. since ds was 16 hours i wasnt expecting a 3 hour labor. dh didn't even have a chance to use his knowledge!!

my emotions are running rampant though. i look at ds (who is doing amazingly well with his new baby sister) and he seems so HUGE and big and just not my little baby anymore. i hope that i can deal with 2 kids, i know i am going to have my hands full and try to stop myself from thinking about how am i going to do stuff with TWO kids when i had a hard enough time with one??? ugh.

[RainbowsMum]

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[Piper's mama]

Mimi-does your daughter sleep in the bed with you at night? I ask because my DD did the same thing for about 2 weeks. I would feed her, she'd fall asleep, I'd put her into her co-sleeper next to the bed, she'd spit up soon after and wake up crying. We would do that for about 3 hours every night until I decided to put her on the breast in our bed. The first night she fell asleep immediatley and slept for 6 hours!: It was most awesome. Also, this may sound a bit harsh, but Ina May Gaskins says to not mess with your baby too much when they eat. She believes it can cause colic and indigestion. Her reasoning is that we wouldn't want someone stroking our heads & back and playing with our toes while we are eating. Just some suggestions. I hope she feels better

[blairinargentina]

Isabel is 3 weeks today! Feels like the shortest and longest three weeks of our lives! We are doing well and are finally on our own... after epic grandparent visits. She is gaining weight like a champ, weighed in at 6lb 12oz yesterday (was 6,6 at birth). Feels good to know all this breastfeeding is paying off. So far she's quite the sleeper... thank goodness... and will usually sleep for 3.5-4.5 hr stretches at night with not much fuss after eating (although she has starting spitting up more, is that normal?). I have to stroke her hand to keep her awake while she eats, I wonder if Ina May is onto something there?

As for momma, I am hanging in there but still dealing with the disconnection from the birth trauma. It's better, definately, but I don't think i feel the baby bliss that so many other people describe. Makes me sad to think that the bonding hasn't been automatic. How can you not be completely overwhelmed with love for such a beautiful little person? I know it is happening, just slowly I guess. Will this get easier? Anyone else dealt with this?

All in all life with a babe is great, despite the last paragraph! DH is a superstar and i fall in love with him more everyday. And we both fall in love with our baby more every minute!

[Piper's mama]

Originally Posted by blairinargentina

Isabel is 3 weeks today! Feels like the shortest and longest three weeks of our lives! We are doing well and are finally on our own... after epic grandparent visits. She is gaining weight like a champ, weighed in at 6lb 12oz yesterday (was 6,6 at birth). Feels good to know all this breastfeeding is paying off. So far she's quite the sleeper... thank goodness... and will usually sleep for 3.5-4.5 hr stretches at night with not much fuss after eating (although she has starting spitting up more, is that normal?). I have to stroke her hand to keep her awake while she eats, I wonder if Ina May is onto something there?

As for momma, I am hanging in there but still dealing with the disconnection from the birth trauma. It's better, definately, but I don't think i feel the baby bliss that so many other people describe. Makes me sad to think that the bonding hasn't been automatic. How can you not be completely overwhelmed with love for such a beautiful little person? I know it is happening, just slowly I guess. Will this get easier? Anyone else dealt with this?

All in all life with a babe is great, despite the last paragraph! DH is a superstar and i fall in love with him more everyday. And we both fall in love with our baby more every minute!

That is awesome that she is sleeping so well! Congratulations!
As far as how you are feeling, please know that it is normal. And don't beat yourself up. When I had DD I felt like I was 2 people. When I held her immediatley after birth, first I wept and kept saying "my baby, my baby" in this moaning voice. Then I calmed down and looked at her and thought "what is this thing?". She was bluish colored, covered in vernix, and smelled like blood (which actually repulsed me). So there is half of you that is totally a mother and would walk thru fire for your child immediately (instinct), but there is the other half of you that has to get to know and get used to this new person in your life that you will be taking care of and worrying about forever (intellect). It's normal to "get to know" your baby. And you are bonding. By feeding her and loving her and meeting her needs. Don't worry mama, you are doing a great job!

[bookwormommy]

I'm psyched to be on this thread now. I was really miserable being pregnant, and even with the exhaustion and sore nipples and sore elsewheres now I'm really happy to not be pregnant!

Shayla is 4 days old now and seems to be settling into a routine. I nursed her in bed last night and we didn't do the latches as well because I was half asleep and slouching, and today my nipples are really sore. She liked it though! Any tips for night nursing?

She loves the sling - we had her in it on day 2 and she'll sleep in it for a couple hours while we're up walking around, doing dishes, etc. My very nice neighbor who doesn't speak much English is quite concerned about the sling, though. She keeps saying to me "spine straight, spine straight", as Shayla is slumped down in it.

I'm still trying to process the birth in little bits and pieces. Every time I think of it I cry because I had wanted a home birth so badly for both her and my sakes. I'm trying to get over myself and just focus on my sweet babe.

I'm really glad I found mothering.com - it's been so helpful all through this process to hear what everyone is thinking and going through.

Erin

[bookwormommy]

Oops, I forgot I was going to respond to blairinargentina - I feel like I'm bonding slowly also, which is partly just how I am. My DP was instantly in love with her, but I kept thinking that she wasn't my baby. I don't feel like I know who she is. It's kind of surreal to look down and there's a small stranger attached to my breast!

Every day she seems a little bit more familiar though. I'm sure that both our babies feel our love and caring for them, even if all the emotions aren't there yet on our part.

Erin

[crazyeight]

i kinda had to rebond with my ds. i had the instict for dd when she was born, the paranoia about her not breathing, what if something happened to her? i would about cry. rebonding with ds was that my mind was realizing hes not a little baby, trying to make room in my heart for more love. i look at him and hes so huge, so independent and he looks different to me somehow.

so we tried out our sling today. i feel like i am not doing it right. its just a long piece of fabric that i bought and got directions for wraps off the net. i wonder if the fabric is to stretchy. she kinda squirmed around in it while she was sleeping but we did breast feed a little bit. it wasn't quite right cause i still felt like i needed to support her head to make sure she wasn't pulling my nipple. my back and belly don't seem to like the extra pressure either. anyone else still feel like they are "bent over" from being pg?

i really think that slinging is going to be the only way i am ever going to get stuff done but i hope i can get it figured out before its to late.

so another thing is that she is feeding a TON. usually about every 1.5-2 hours she is taking a decent sized feeding. a little bit longer at night but not much. shes sleeping alot today and yesterday so this may be a growth spurt BUT this has been how much shes been feeding since birth. i hope if this is a growth spurt that it helps her go a little longer between eating. though at least its not painful anymore. all healed up and latching on really well. still a little engorged though.

[lobster]

Lyndy's a week old already and I can't believe how much he has changed! He's already 2ozs over his birth weight (he now weighs 8lbs 7ozs); the breastfeeding is going extremely well! We had a latch issue on the right breast for the first couple of days, but it was easily fixed with a little help from our doula.

Our first couple of nights co-sleeping were... sleepless. My husband almost rolled onto Lyndy a couple of times the first night, but since has become hyper-aware of his presence and wakes up too easily to do any damage. Now that Lyndy has more or less established a feeding pattern (every three hours or so), we're actually getting lots of sleep!

Cloth diapering has been a lot easier than I thought it was going to be. I just cannot imagine using disposables! The cloth diapers we got are so soft when they come out of the dryer, the thought of putting a disposable against his tender skin makes me shudder.

As for me, I have been feeling absolutely fantastic since his birth. My energy levels are up from what they were while I was pregnant, and I'm just loving life. I want to be out and active, but I'm still too sore *down there* to do much more than short walks. I've been using an herbal wash in a spray bottle; very soothing.

I continue to be amazed at this perfect little person and wonder what the heck I ever did without him.

[crazyeight]

i am jelous of you lobster. i remember feeling really good when ds was only just under a week old. i went out for walks, i could drive, i had energy, i was happy......not so much this time.

we haven't gotten any kind of feeding schedule really. she nurses every time she fusses cause it seems to be all she wants. occasionally she'll accept the bouncing, walking, rocking combo as comfort but not for long. she wakes up for "alert time" at 8 or so at night when ds is winding down. of course at this time she nurses every hour or so and then takes 5 min mini naps that trick me into thinking shes might actually go to bed at a decent hour and i might actually get some sleep. dh still isn't sleeping in bed with me cause hes not hyper aware of any thing while he sleeps and i just got the pack n play out last night and she used it half the night. we'll see how tonight goes.

any advice on what to do? ds was one of those by the book babies. he ate every 4 hours, wasn't over clingy, slept really great from the beginning, didn't need excessive holding (not that its bad....). ayla is just not quite like that.

i really feel like i am going to fail when dh goes back to work if i don't do something soon.

[lobster]

Danielle - Lyndy didn't really settle into feeding every three hours until I started doing breast compressions. At first I was just nursing him until he fell asleep on the boob, then switching sides til he fell asleep again on the other. My doula lent me Dr. Jack Newman's Guide to Breastfeeding, and I went to his website as well - he recommends doing breast compressions when the baby falls asleep, to get the baby to finish the breast before switching. So I went ahead and gave it a try, and Lyndy was much fuller and went for much longer before wanting to nurse again. If you go to Jack Newman's website there are video clips showing you how to do it. Worth a try if you're not doing it already!

Other than that, I don't really have much advice for you This is my first baby and I'm just kind of going with the flow, which is working very well for us. I hope you get everything sorted out.

[crazyeight]

do you have a link to the site? i think thats a big problem is that she doesn't get enough of the thick hindmilk to make her full. shes a very sleepy baby when it comes to feeding, i try to get her to stay awake and nurse but it doens't always work. i would like to try and get her to really empty the breast to see if that helps.

[Mimi37]

I think this is it -- http://www.drjacknewman.com/index.ph...d=18&Itemid=42
Looks like good stuff so far!

ETA: I am so jealous of that video mama's nipples, it's not even funny..... I feel like with nips like that, life would be much easier! Well, bf would be easier anyway.

[bookwormommy]

OMG - I started trying this (breast compression) yesterday and my baby is sleeping so much more! Like 3-4 hours at a stretch last night! Her feedings themselves are noticeably longer but it's worth it for uninterrupted sleep!

Erin

[crazyeight]

nak

when i did the first compressions it did help. she went 3 hours but then she fed 3 times in 4 hours and we had a horrible night. now when i start compressions she stops nursing. she always falls asleep while eating. oy....

[ErinBird]

Raina was born early Sunday morning. We ran into a rough spot on Tuesday night/Wednesday morning when my milk came in. Raina was sooooo pissed off that the milk would flow when she'd suck. Like, pissed in a screaming red in the face for hours and totally inconsolable way.

Oh my god. I thought I was going to lose it. We were all sobbing uncontrollably at one point- not fun.

I ended up making a doctor's appointment for later in that day and contacted a local LLL leader. I'm so grateful for my conversation with her- she gave me a bunch of suggestions for helping Raina deal with the milk flow and reminded me that it will get better, and that we all just needed to get used to each other and stay calm. Its okay if she cries a bit.

She hated the doctor (though we liked him...) and cried herself into the same pissed off refusing the breast state. He said unfortunately it was normal for some babies, but he'd give us some homeopathic chamomile to try and help her calm down.

We went into last night hoping for the best, and it wasn't so bad at all. Raina went on a screaming binge a few times, and the chamomile helped calm her enough so that other ways of calming her actually worked (tight swaddle, nursing, walking/dancing).

We're also starting to see aregular nursing pattern- more or less up every two hours for a good feed. Every so often she goes a little longer and wakes up wanting more than one side. Shes mastered the art of comfort sucking (thank god) and we've figured out nursing while lying down. Yay!

[Mimi37]

Originally Posted by Piper's mama

Mimi-does your daughter sleep in the bed with you at night?

She sleeps a variety of places but has done that spit up routine in all of them including bed w/ mama (and I don't mess w/ her much while she eats since she got over her jaundice.) It does seem to be improving w/ time (and Maalox?)................. and......

SHE JUST SLEPT FOR 4 HRS, 10 MINUTES STRAIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!! New record by over an hour. I am so thrilled I can't contain myself. : I may just survive this after all

nak, happily

[orangefoot]

Danielle

about the sling- you could try a really simple tie which will probably leave you with a really long tail but won't feel baggy.

Hold the cloth like a bath towel when you dry your back the pass it over one shoulder and under the other arm. Tie it tight with a knot o your chest. Pull the sling around so that the knot moves to your back and you have a nery short 'sash' on your front. Put your babe on your shoulder as if burping her, open the sash and let her slide down into it so that her head is still on your shoulder but her bum back and shoulders are in the cloth. You can leave her legs bundled up or you can pull them out of the bottom and leave the edge of the cloth pulled well up under her bottom.

here's a quick pic to show it
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v7...t/IMGP1296.jpg