OP, I don't want to put words in your mouth, so excuse me if I am wrong about any of this. If I recall the OP 's original post, she at first felt that her dh was choosing the right path in not fighting for his kids. He was going to wait until they were older, then they could choose to know him. We MDC mamas convinced her that her husband should establish a relationship now and that the kids would probably feel rejected that he hadn't chose to know them sooner. Now she thinks we are right, and theres a bunch a post telling her to ease up on the guy!
I guess we just really don't know everything. It would be hard for me not to judge the guy. It seems that when you got into the marriage you understood that the situation was X, but as you get to know more, it seems more likeY, so eventhough you married him with knowledge, you can change your view of the situation. It would be hard for me not to judge and think, if those were children we had together, would you be that kind of dad to them? I guess I would offer to support him in whatever way he needed like paperwork, calling lawyers and all the other little details that can overwealm. It still has to come from him. What is he afraid of?