Toddler harnesses and leashes

[RomanGoddess]

What do you all think of these from a Montessori perspective?

While I do acknowledge that an argument might be made for them in certain situations (twins or multiples?) I am horrified at the number of people who are in favour of these generally. I cannot imagine putting my 2-year old in one of them, based on my own feeling that controlling the movements of someone else should only be done in exceptional circumstances and I do believe that this would be also very, well, UNmontessori. I even disagree with forcing DD into the stroller except when safety or time make the stroller absolutely necessary (which is very annoying to friends walking with me because it means that we have to walk at my daughter's pace ).

[mightymoo]

I'm no expert on montessori philosophy and I've never used a leash. However, I would see a leash to be more montessori than the alternative. I'm assuming you do not just let your child run willy nilly in dangerous and crowded situations. In this case, I see the leash as an alternative to forcing the child to walk right next to you and forcing them to hold your hand, both of which my children often do not want to do. The leash allows them freedom of movement while allowing you to keep them safe.

I don't know how other parents use leashes and I've never used one myself, but I've considered it - if I did use one, I would never use the leash to control the child's movement, I wouldn't yank on it, or restrain them with it, it just would be a safety net if the child ran into a truly dangerous situation unexpectedly. Otherwise I would be using typical redirection to guide them. I think folks think of leashes on kids as being used like you would use a leash on a dog, to drag them around. On the contrary, I see a child leash as just a way to tether child and parent together to avoid seperation, not to control the child's movements. Ideally the child would be unware the leash had a restraining effect.

[Lillianna]

Well I must admit being surprised that so many mothers defend the use of the leash or harness. I could understand for a very small preverbal child who is cared for by an elderly or otherwise disabled person in crowds for safety and for limited use. I do think the potential for abuse is huge and worry about the psychological ramifications for an otherwise normally developing child who is "tethered" to the parent unnecessarily or for regular use. There is a reason that it reminds many people of the treatment animals receive.
I do believe that we must be very close with our young children, interacting with them often and teaching them to be smart in crowds: to listen to your voice, be aware of others and vehicles, and to stay close. I feel that all this can be done without a leash. Children should have opportunities to practice these skills in a safe environment before expecting them to "perform" in public places. For example, opportunities to take a walk on the sidewalk (unrestrained) and to step a bit away from the caregiver and have a feeling of independence. From a Montessori perspective, I would recall her adage that any useless help is an obstacle to the child's development. I worry that the harness could really become an obstable to the healthy development of self-confidence, self-awareness and self-reliance.

[BusyMommy]

fyi You may want to tread lightly here as the UA states you're not allowed to discuss other threads at all.