6 week visit

[KarmaChameleon]

Had a VERY fun conversation with a friend the other day...

her: let's have a playdate on Tuesday
me: I can't -- I have my 6 week visit with the midwives
her: Ahhhhh, the 6 week visit -- that's the one where they tell you it's okay to have sex again and you laugh hysterically at them
me: (snorting) totally -- because who actually waits that long?
her: (confused horrified look) that's not why *WE* laugh.


Seriously though, I had my 6 week visit and it was quite bittersweet. Everything is fine -- that's the sweet part. But....it was hard to say goodbye! There will be no more pregnancies and no more babies, no more homebirths and no more prenatal appointments. I have gorwn to care for my midwfie and her apprentice very much, and it was with them that my husband and I shared the most intimate night of our lives.

sniff.

[SummerTwilight]

Ok, I admit, I am with your friend. I would laugh at the very idea that I have TIME or energy for sex. At this point (2 days shy of 4 weeks) I don't physically feel up for it cause I don't feel like my stitches have healed up yet...I still wipe carefully after using the bathroom so I don't think I am up to anything more vigorous than that.
I agree with missing the midwives though. Sad that it is back to the doctors after this. Midwifes are such a joy that they make me dread using anyone but them.

[peilover010202]

Oh, i bet that was bittersweet. When dh, ds and I moved across the country - I was sad to know that I'd never have another baby with the ob I loved so much (the one who encouraged and defended my natural birth.)

On another note, I'm with your friend too! At 7 weeks pp, I still don't have the energy to DTD. Oh, I have - but I sure use the "Not until 6 weeks honey!" line a LOT in those first few weeks.

[the_lissa]

I had my 6 week appt today too. Very bittersweet. I run into my midwives in the community a lot, and they've talked to me about helping with a bf seminar for their clients, and they want my husband to help them with their blackberries, so it's not goodbye goodbye.

My midwives always told me we can have sex whenever we feel like it, which was 2 weeks for both babies. My midwife asked me today if I had resumed intercourse, and I was like uhhh yeah a long time ago.

[boobyfeeder]

I'm with your friend, even though I feel great I really am not ready to DTD. Emotionally I'm all wacky and just not into it. As far as missing the m/w, I had a UC with this one, but saw a CNM for prenatal care. She found out that it was a planned UC and fired me. I'm sad that I will never see her professionally again, but such is life. I wouldn't change anything, I had my perfect birth.

[~PurityLake~]

I'm with you.

I wasn't comfortable enough to enjoy sex with my husband the last 2-3 months I was pregnant. It's now been 4 weeks since Sophia was born and I really can't wait. Last time, we had sex 2 weeks out. That was definitely too early, but I'm so ready now.

[Azreial]

the mw's I see just seem to assume you dtd before the 6wk checkup. After dd's birth they told me 1 week after I stopped bleeding. I risked out of the bc with A&D but I saw them 5wks pp to get an iud and they assumed we were already dtd then, which we were
It was a few months with C, but I had a 2 uetrin infection in the month after his birth, a 2nd decree tear that just would not heal (ended up getting it cauterised 3 maybe 4mths pp) And his dad and I both lived with our parents. I have to say it hurt like a sob when we did dtd, but it was before the tear healed, but we didn't know that it was supposed to have been healed by then.
I think it was 3wks with E, and the first couple of time were uncomfortable physically but utterly amazing
It was 4 wks this time and it was painful mentally and physically. I was afraid my stitched would rip open and when dh touched the incision area it was a major mood killer. Concidering its a very low incision, my pubic hair completley covers it, there's a lot of oppertunity for touching it. Plus I sometimes get c/s flashbacks from laying flat on my back :

[Katiemare]

With #1, the time was right at 5 weeks. This time we are at 7 weeks and still counting. We'll see.

About the c/x scar, that is a difficult thing to deal with, and i know what you mean. Aren't you pretty much numb in the skin over the scar? Then you shouldn't notice it being touched. It took over a year to get all the feeling back for me.

[Tofu the Geek]

I am 3 weeks pp and just started thinking I might be interested in sex again. But, I still have light bleeding and pretty much figured I had to wait until the bleeding stopped. Anyone know if their is any truth to this? My midwife is out of town right now, so I can't ask her.

[Bay Area Babe]

We DTD around 3.5 weeks (had a c-sec).

[ambotchka]

we started trying after about 1.5 wks, since I didn't have any tears, but it was way to early, so nothing really happened. I'm 7wks now, and we've only dtd a couple times because it hurts. My 6wks appt hurt too b/c she did a pap smear, and anything going in hurts. She said it shouldn't hurt, but that the pain should go away with time. Don't they always say that? DH saw that I was crying last time so he won't ask anymore until I'm really ready.

[mamamilkers]

Well I'm currently seperated, so no nookie for me! My midwife did a pap today and, um, thought I must have been doing a whole lot of kegels (if you know what I mean). I haven't been, but man, if that wasn't a confidence booster! Now if I could just get back in the saddle again to try it out . . .

[AmieV]

what!?! You can do it before 6 weeks?? My DH has been counting down the days till that appointment! And I have to admit, I'm wanting to do it too. With DD1 I was overdue so we had done it a lot the week before she arrived but this time I was caught offguard so it had been awhile! The only thing is that I'm absolutely terrified of becoming pregnant and we haven't done anything about that yet.

and KC...I'm totally with you. I'm not looking forward to that appointment simply because it closes the door on so many fond memories.

[NaomiLorelie]

We DTD 2 weeks PP this time. The other times were at 4 weeks. People think I'm nuts.

[mimi!]

hmmmmmm,
this is an iteresting conversation. I hadn't even thought of having sex. With ds I was so terribly *dry* even with trying to use lubes, it was totally uncomfortable. Is anyone else in this dept.? Or are you having sex comfortably, if not enjoyably?

[KarmaChameleon]

Originally Posted by mimi!

Or are you having sex comfortably, if not enjoyably?

I'm enjoying myself

Although terrified about getting pg again. terrified. that cuts into the enjoyment a little bit: